You Know My Heart
by hergoldeneyes
Summary: AU AH - Since the day they met, everyone knew Alice and Jasper were meant to be. But can they both be convinced of that at the right time? How will they overcome the things life throw at them? One thing's for sure; they know each other better than anyone.
1. Chapter 1

**My first real Alice/Jasper fic. Hope you guys like it.**

**A couple of notes: No Charlie and Renee here. Sorry, guys. I love Charlie, but he didn't fit in my head D: Sorry. Hope you guys like it anyway, though.**

**Alice's POV – Three Years Old**

"Momma," I said, tugging on my mom's skirt. My Mommy's name was Marissa Brandon. She and my daddy, Erik Brandon, had been married for years and years and years! Daddy was at work, and Mommy had been on the phone with someone for a whole three minutes!

"Not now, Alice," she said, patting my head. "Mommy's on the phone with Esme." Esme Cullen was my god-momma, and her husband, Carlisle Cullen, was my god-daddy.

My bottom lip stuck out in a pout, but I nodded and wandered over to the stairs. I hopped up the steps, counting as I went.

"One step, two step, three step, four. Five step, seven step, eight step, more!" I jumped from the number eight step to the last step and walked down the hallway to my bedroom door. I stretched up on my tippy-toes to try and reach the knob.

"I'm so tiny!" I screamed just as my hand reached the doorknob. I turned it and went into my room, just as Mommy called my name.

"Alice!" she said from downstairs. "Get dressed, honey! Esme and Claudia are coming over with their kids so they can meet you and your sister!" Claudia Hale was Mommy's other friend and my sister's god-momma. She, Esme, and Mommy were inseparable. I wondered if Claudia's husband, Richard Hale, was coming too. My sister loved seeing her god-daddy.

"Kay!" I said right back and twirled into my room, trying to be graceful like the fairies in the pictures on my walls. I pulled open the door to my closet and climbed on my stool to be able to reach my clothes.

"What should I wear?" I asked myself, tapping my chin. "Oohh, this is pretty!" I pulled a blue dress with polka-dots and a white ribbon off of a hanger and jumped down from my stool.

As I changed, I sang my own version of _Mary had a Little Lamb._

"Mary Alice had a little cat, little cat, little cat. Mary Alice had a little cat whose fur was black as night," I sang, trying to pull up the zipper on the dress. "And everywhere that Alice went, Alice went, Alice went; everywhere that Alice went the cat was sure to go!" My door opened and Mommy walked in.

"Here, sweetie, let me help you with that," she said with a laugh. She left the door open and came up behind me, pulling up the zipper.

"Momma, where's Pixie?" I asked her. Pixie was my black kitty-cat that we'd adopted from a shelter the year before.

"I don't know, Alice," she said. "Here, let me fix up that hair of yours. It's so messy."

I nodded and sat in front of the mirror we had in my room. Mommy sat on my bed behind me and pulled what I called the "hair box" out from under my bed. She pulled out a flat iron—though it didn't look like an iron to me—and plugged it into the wall. She waited for a while, brushing my very short black hair out and humming a song I didn't know. When she finally got to using the iron, I was tapping my foot, tired of sitting.

"Alice, please sit still," my mom begged. "I need to get this done before—oh, Pixie!"

Pixie had jumped onto my lap and I'd jumped in surprise. I smiled and hugged my cat tightly.

"Pixie!" I said, pressing my cheek to hers. "There you are!"

My mother laughed and continued to fix my hair into its usual pixie-style. Momma always said I was like a pixie, so that's why I'd named my kitty that.

"Momma, where's Bella?" I asked. Bella was my twin sister. We didn't look much alike, though. The only thing our looks had in common were our pale skin. Mommy said it was because we were destined to be our own people, whatever that meant.

"So many questions today," Mommy said, laughing some more. "She's getting ready, too."

"No I'm not." I turned my head slightly to see that Bella had come into the room wearing a dark blue dress with different colored ruffles at the bottom. Her long, brown hair was tied in a ponytail on the side of her head with a blue flower that was attached to a rubber band.

"You look pwetty, Bella," I said to her.

"Thank you, Alice," she said, doing a clumsy curtsey. I giggled—my sister could trip over air, but it was one of those things that just made me love her even more. Her cheeks turned pink.

"You look pwetty, too," she said. I smiled at her.

"Thanks," I squeaked.

"There you go, Alice," Mommy said, putting down the iron. "You're all done."

I smiled at myself in the mirror and giggled when Bella came and hugged me. I heard the doorbell ring.

"Oh, and just in time, too," my mom said as she hurried out of the room. "Come downstairs, girls!"

"We'll be right there!" Bella called. I lifted Pixie into my arms and Bella and I stood side by side and stared at our reflections in the mirror. We really didn't look much alike. My hair was black, straight, and short, where hers was long, curly, and brown. I was short, even for my age, and Bella stood an entire three inches taller than me.

"Let's go," she said. "Momma's waiting."

I nodded and put Pixie on the floor. Bella and I raced out of the room, my fat cat behind us.

We ran down the stairs just in time to see Esme and Claudia entering the house.

"Alice, Bella, oh, come here, girls!" Esme said when she saw us. We skipped toward her, but I stopped when Bella fell. She got back up and we both gave Esme a great big hug.

"And what about me?" Claudia asked. There was a smile on her face as we gave her an equally large hug.

"Kids, get in here!" Esme called out the door. Soon enough, four kids like me and Bella came walking into the house.

"Introduce yourselves," Claudia said, pushing a sweet looking little boy with green eyes and reddish hair in front of her.

"Hey," he said with a smile. I could see he was looking directly at Bella. I took a peek at my sister and saw her blush. I tried not to giggle. "My name is Edward Cullen. I'm this many." He held up three fingers. "How do you do?" He bowed and I couldn't stop my giggles.

"Such a gentleman," my mom said to Esme who beamed with pride.

"I'm Emmett, Edward's big brother," another boy said. "I'm four years old." He had brown hair and green eyes, like Edward. He reminded me of my teddy bear, Ted that I had in my room.

"Hi," a very pretty blonde girl with blue eyes said. She was wearing a white and pink dress and big white sunglasses on her head. She looked older, too, but I had a very strong feeling in me that we were going to be great friends. She gave Bella and me a wave that reminded me of a princess. "I'm Rosalie, but you can call me Rose. I'm four years old, too." She looked at Emmett and smiled a small smile at him. "Oh, and this is my younger brother."

A blonde boy stepped out from behind Claudia. His eyes were a bright blue, different from his sister's. He saw me looking at him and smiled. "I'm Jasper Hale," he said, stepping toward me. "I'm three years old. Pleased to make your 'cuaintence."

I didn't know what the last sentence really meant, and I sorta knew he didn't either, but I did a Bella-blush when he kissed my hand and smiled at me.

"You kissed my hand," I said. "Why?"

He stepped back and shrugged. "I see my daddy do it to ladies all the time."

"You think I'm a lady?"

He nodded. "A very pwetty lady."

I giggled again.

"Well, my name's Bella," Bella said, pointing to herself.

"I'm Alice," I said, bouncing a bit and smiling as wide as I could. "Well, my name is Mary Alice, but I like Alice better. Bella and I are three years old. Nice to meet you all."

"Well, why don't we let the kids play together?" Momma said to her friends. "I have some things to share with the two of you anyway."

Momma, Esme, and Claudia all went into the kitchen, leaving the six of us all by our little lonesomes in the living room.

"So," Emmett said. "Whatcha guys wanna do?"

"How bout we just talk?" Jasper said. "You and Rose can talk, Edward and Bella can talk, and me and Alice can talk."

Edward shrugged, and it looked to me like he was trying not to smile. "Sounds good to me."

"Me too," Rosalie said, walking toward Emmett.

Bella gave me a small, quick hug before running over to Edward. She tripped over air in the process, but Edward caught her before she could fall and hurt her face.

"Hi, Jasper," I said when he walked over to me.

"Hi, Alice," he said. "You can call me Jazz, by the way."

"Well, hi, Jazz," I said, giggling again. "So, you really think I'm pwetty?"

"I think you're very pwetty," he said.

I bit my finger and I knew I prolly did another Bella-blush. "You dun think I have cooties?"

"No," he said, shaking his head. "Why would I think you have cooties?"

I shrugged. "Lotsa boys think girls have cooties."

"Well, not me," he said. "What about you? Lotsa girls think boys have cooties, too."

"I don't," I said. "And I dun think Bella and Rose do, either."

We both looked behind us and saw Bella laughing at something Edward said and Rosalie listening happily to whatever Emmett was talking about.

"Edward and Emmett dun, either," he said, laughing. No, it wasn't really a laugh. What was that word Momma had used when Daddy laughed that way? Chuckle? I think that was it.

"So, what's your daddy like?" I asked him, sitting criss-cross on the floor. He sat down next to me.

"He looks a lot like me," Jasper said. "He likes working with cars and is trying to teach Rose to do stuff with cars, too. He wanted me to learn, but I didn't wanna. What about your dad?"

"He's nice," I said. "I look more like him than I look like my momma. Bella looks like my momma, though. My daddy's a nice man. He drives planes."

"That's cool," he said.

"Hey, you wanna see my room?" I asked, jumping up off the floor and landing on my feet.

"Sure," he said, standing up, too. "Will we get in trouble?"

I shook my head. "Nah. I dun think so. But, here, lemme ask." I looked over at Bella. "Bells, will I get in trouble if I show Jazz my room?"

Bella shook her head, too. "I dun think so." She turned to Edward. "Edward, you wanna see _my _room?"

Edward smiled brightly. "Sure, Bella!" he said.

"Hey, what about us?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah, we wanna see your rooms, too," Rose added.

"You guys can come, too!" I said. "Let's go!"

I grabbed Jasper's hand and started to run up the stairs, but Momma's voice stopped me.

"Where do you kids think you're going?" she asked. I thought we were in trouble, but Momma was smiling, and Momma never smiled if we were in trouble.

"We're taking our friends to see our rooms," Bella said.

Momma smiled even wider. "All right, then. Just don't make a mess, alright?"

"Okay!" I said. "Come on, Jasper." We continued up the stairs until we got to the very top. Pixie was taking a nap next to my door and she meowed when we woke her up. I picked her up into my arms.

"This is Pixie," I said to Jasper as everyone else went into Bella's room. "She's my cat."

Jasper pet her head and she purred.

"She's sweet," Jasper said. "Where'd ya get her?"

"A animal shelter," I said, stretching up again to reach my doorknob. "Wanna hear a song about her?"

"I'd love to hear it," Jazz said. I started singing my revised _Mary had a Little Lamb _song. When I was done, Jasper clapped.

"Bravo," he said.

"What's that mean?" I asked, confused, as I opened the door to my room. Jasper shrugged.

"I dunno, but people usually say it when they like something," he said.

"Oh," I said. "Okay! Thanks."

I let him into my room and he gasped. I giggled.

The walls of my room were painted black, but they had pink and blue sparkles on them. I liked to pretend that it was pixie dust. I had pictures of fairies in frames on the walls, and a black bed with more sparkles on it in the middle of the room. I had a fairy rug on the wood floor and lots of flowers everywhere. It was my fairytale room, as Momma called it.

"It's pwetty," Jasper said, touching the wall. He looked at the top of the wall. "Did you write that?"

In a pink, curly font that my daddy called cursive at the top of my wall, the words _Just a bit of pixie dust_ were written.

"Nope," I said. "I can't spell that good. My momma did it."

"It looks nice," he said. "Can I sit on your bed?"

"Course," I said, taking a seat next to him.

"Have you always lived in Forks?" he asked.

"Yep," I said. "Lived here my whole life. How bout you, Jazz?"

"Me and Rose was born in Houston," he said. "But that was just 'cuz my parents had been visiting my grandmamma when I was born. They had their house here, though."

"Hou-ston," I said, trying to say it right. "Where's that at?"

"In Texas," he said.

"And where's Texas?"

"It's at the bottom of the map," he said. "Ya know, that weird shaped state next to New Mesico."

"_New _Mesico?" I asked. "Do they have an Old Mesico?"

Jasper thought for a second. "I think so, but I dunno. Maybe it's like New York. There's a new one, but there's not an old one."

"Maybe," I said, nodding. "Or maybe they accidently made the new one before the old one!"

"Yeah! Maybe they forgot that there had to be an Old York before they made a New York!"

I giggled. "The people who make the states needa be fired."

"What's fired mean, Alice?"

"Not sure, I just know it's something my momma and daddy never wanna be."

"Hm. My momma and daddy, too."

I shrugged. "Maybe it's all the adults."

Bella poked her head in through my door. "You two wanna play hide 'n seek with us?"

I looked over at Jasper. "You wanna play?"

"Do you wanna play?"

"I wanna play."

"We'd love to play, Bella," he said, smiling and standing up. I stood up next to him. He laughed.

"What?" I asked, pouting.

"You're short," he chuckled.

I put my hands on my hips. "Well you were born in the state next to New Mesico!"

He laughed and we both followed Bella to her room. Edward, Emmett, and Rosalie were on her bed with their shoes off and their feet forming half a circle.

"You two playing?" Emmett asked me and Jasper.

"We're playing," I said, slipping off my shoes. Jasper did the same, and we went to go sit on the bed with Bella and the others, making the other half of the circle. Bella put her finger on one of her feet to start.

"Bubble gum, bubble gum, in a dish. How many pieces do you wish?" She landed on one of Rosalie's feet.

"Um… three," Rose said.

"One, two, three," Bella counted. She landed on one of my feet. "Okay, Alice, take one foot out."

I curled my leg under me and sat on it as Bella continued. Eventually, Jasper was It.

"Alright, Jazz, how high can you count?" Emmett asked.

Jasper thought for a second. "I can count to ten."

"Me too," Emmett said, high fiving him. "Okay, so close your eyes and count to ten."

Without really thinking about it, I kissed Jasper's cheek. "And no peeking," I added with a giggle. His cheeks became pink. At least I wasn't the only one doing the Bella-blush today.

He put his hands over his eyes and went into a corner. Then, he began to count.

The five of us hurried around the room, trying to find places to hide. Rosalie tried Bella's empty toy box, but was too tall to fit. I was small enough and slipped in easily. Forgetting that I was afraid of the dark, I closed the lid and the small lock on the outside clicked shut.

"Oh, no," I whimpered, trying to find light in the dark box. Eventually, I started to cry.

"Help me," I whined. "Somebody help me!"

The top of the box shook and I continued to whine and cry. I hated the dark, that's why I slept with a nightlight.

When the box finally opened and Jasper peeked in, I couldn't help but give him a big hug and continue to cry.

"Alice!" he said, scared. "Are you okay?"

I cried into his shoulder. "It was scary, Jazz!" I said. "It was dark! I couldn't breathe, not really!"

"It's okay," he said. "You're okay, aren't cha?"

I nodded and pulled away from him wiping my eyes and nose. "I guess," I sniffled.

"And, anyway, Emmett's It," he said. I hadn't really seen the others. They had all already been found. I smiled instantly.

"So I won?" I asked. "I got found last?"

Bella laughed. "You did, Alice," she said. "Good job. Only someone as tiny as you could fit in there."

I laughed, too. "Let's play!"

"Not so fast." My Momma walked into the room with Claudia and Esme behind her.

"Sorry, kids, we have to go," Esme said.

"Aw, but Mom!" Emmett whined. "We were having so much fun!"

"No buts," Claudia said. "I'm running late for work and Esme has a doctor's appointment." She grabbed Rosalie and Jasper by the arms. "Let's go, kids."

"Momma, can we please say bye to our friends?" Rosalie asked. "Please?"

Claudia let go of their arms and smiled. "Alright. We'll wait for you kids downstairs."

My momma and Esme followed Claudia out of Bella's room.

"Well, buh-bye," Rosalie said, giving me and Bella a hug. "It was nice to meet you." She hugged Emmett and Edward, too.

Jasper shook Bella, Edward, and Emmett's hands before coming to me. I thought he was gonna shake my hand, too, when he took my hand in his, but he kissed it like he had earlier instead. I hoped that would be my last Bella-blush of the day.

"It was nice to meet you," he said. I knew he was talking to everyone, but he was looking at me.

Emmett and Edward said their goodbyes, too. Emmett hugged Rosalie and Edward hugged Bella, but both of them shook hands with me and Jasper.

"See you guys later," I said as they left Bella's room and I heard them walk down the stairs.

"Bella, we made friends!" I gushed.

"I know!" she said. We both plopped down on her bed and stared at her ceiling.

"Jasper's my best friend!" I said.

"Hey, I thought I was your best friend!" Bella said.

"You're my best friend, too, Bells," I said, smiling and giving her a hug.

"Teehee," Bella giggled. "It's okay. Edward's my best friend, too, now."

"Emmett, Rose, and Edward are my best friends, too," I said.

"Mine, too," she sighed.

"But I thought you could only have one best friend," I whispered.

Bella thought for a second. "I think that if you have lotsa good friends, then you're allowed to have more than one best friend."

I thought that over for a while. "Makes sense," I decided. "You're smart, Bells."

She smiled. "I know."

I threw a stuffed horsey at her and we both broke into a round of giggles, giving a nice end to a nice day.

**Author's Note: Love it? Hate it? I'm not putting up more till I get some responses ;D I added pictures of the girls' dresses to my website (hergoldeneyes(dot)webs(dot)com) so you can go see those ^^ Reviews are love!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I got a few great responses for the first chapter so I am most definitely continuing this story. Hope I get more reviews this time around, though. None of that putting me on your favorites or subscribing without a review, alright? lol. **

**Miss Books a Lot: Yes, this is an all human story. Hope you still read, though. (:**

**Also, you have no clue how hard it is to write a story as if you were a normal four year old, and not a four year old like I was who could use proper grammar and spelling and do crap that kids can't usually do till like the second/third grade. Haha; so, anyway, onward!**

**Alice's POV – Age Four**

"Momma, we don't wanna go!" me and Bella whined for the bazillionth time.

"Girls, please," Momma said. "You'll like kindergarten, you'll see. It's Edward and Jasper's first day, too."

I crossed my arms and leaned my head on Bella's shoulder. We were in Momma's car, on our way to school for the first time. It was September the fifth; our first day of kindergarten. Momma had to carry me and Bella into the car that morning. We didn't wanna go. The only reason I didn't jump out the car window and run back home to Pixie was because I knew Jasper was going to be there… and because I was too short to reach high enough up the window to jump.

Momma pulled into the parking lot of Forks Elementary School and I gave Bella a big hug.

"I don't wanna go," I said, trying not to cry. Bella hugged me back.

"I don't wanna go either, Alice," she said, her bottom lip shaking. "At least Edward and Jasper will be there."

I sniffled. "I guess."

Momma came and opened the door before unbuckling our seatbelts for us and taking us out of our car seats and putting us on the floor. Lots of little kids were in the parking lot with their mommies and daddies and lots of them were crying. I smiled proudly since I wasn't crying like they were.

Momma walked us into the school and we sat on a bench. I looked around at all the other kids and parents, looking and looking and looking for…

"Jasper!" I squeaked when I saw him. I tugged on my momma's skirt. "Mommy, mommy! It's Jasper!" I pointed over to the bench where he was sitting with Esme and Edward.

"And Edward!" Bella said. We were both smiling more than we'd smiled all day!

Esme looked up from a magazine she'd been reading and smiled when she saw my momma.

"Marissa!" she said, waving her hand in the air. My mom grabbed mine and Bella's hands.

"Hi!" she said as we walked over. "Nice to see you, Esme." They gave each other a hug and a kiss on their cheeks. "Where's Claudia?"

"Oh, she and I left Emmett and Rosalie at their first grade classroom hours ago," Esme said. "Class starts at eight for them, you know. She left Jasper with me, though, because she was running late for a meeting. I'm taking Rose and Jasper back to my house after school."

"Esme, would you mind taking Bella and Alice with you as well?" Momma asked. "I have a doctor's appointment later then Erik and I have to work late."

"Oh, it's no trouble at all," Esme said. "I love the girls. The six of them can all have one of their play dates."

Momma looked down at me and Bella with a smile on her face. "Does that sound like fun, girls?"

Me and Bella nodded happily.

Momma and Esme sat back down on the bench and started talking to each other. Jasper took a step toward me and kissed my hand, just like he always did when we saw each other. I gave Jasper a big hug, and I saw Bella to the same to Edward.

"I don't wanna go," I said.

"But I thought you wanted to go to the Cullen house after school," he said. His blue eyes were sad, as if I'd hurt his feelings.

"I do!" I said. "I mean, I don't wanna go to school."

"Oh," he said. "Well, it's okay, Alice. At least we'll be together."

I nodded and wiped my nose. "Uh-huh."

"And my momma said it's not as bad as it looks. So, see? No worries."

"What's that mean?"

"I dunno," he said, shrugging. "But my momma was sad this morning, and my daddy said 'no worries' to her, so I figured it was something you said when people were upset."

"Oh," I said. "I get it!"

A woman with curly brown hair, dark skin, and green dress came walking up to me and Jazz. I hid behind him and put my arms around his waist.

"Alice, Jasper," Esme said, "this is your teacher, Ms. Carter."

"Hello," the lady said. "I'm your teacher." She touched my back. "Now, honey, don't be shy."

I grabbed Jasper's hand and stood next to him, looking up and smiling at Ms. Carter.

"I'm Alice," I said. She shook my hand.

"Nice to meet you, Alice," she said. She turned to Jasper. "And who are you?"

"Jasper Hale," he said.

"Hello, Jasper," she said with a smile. "Alice, is he your brother?"

I giggled and kissed Jasper's cheek. "Nope!" I said. "But he's my best friend!"

Ms. Carter smiled again. "Isn't that lovely?"

I nodded. "Oh, but I do have a sister! Her name is Bella! She's over… there," I pointed to Bella, "talking to Edward."

"I'll have to go greet them, then," Ms. Carter said. She smiled at us again and left to go see Bella and Edward.

"So I'm really your best friend?" Jasper asked when she was gone.

"Of course!" I said, kissing his cheek again. "I have lotsa best friends, but you're the bestest!"

"You're my best friend, too," he said shyly. He looked at me for a second, and he looked like he was thinking about something. Slowly, he kissed my mouth.

I giggled just as Ms. Carter called all the kids over.

"Alright, kids, say your last goodbyes to your parents then come and line up against the wall," she said.

I ran over to my momma and gave her a big hug. Bella was right behind me.

"Bye, Momma," Bella said. I could see she was crying. Tears filled my eyes.

"Bye, Momma," I said.

"Bye, girls," she said, kissing both our heads. "I'll see you later okay?"

I nodded. "Okay."

"Now, go say bye to Esme, too," Momma said. Bella and I ran over to Esme.

"Bye, Esme," I said. "See you after school."

"Have fun," she said. She let us both go and me and Bella went to go line up with Jasper and Edward.

Ms. Carter walked in front of all the kids with a big, silver camera.

"Everyone, say cheese!" she said.

"Cheeeeeeeeeeeeese!" Me, Jasper, Bella, and Edward put our arms around each other and smiled just as Ms. Carter pressed a button and took the picture.

"All right, children, are you excited?" she asked.

"Yes!" all the kids screamed. The only sound I made was that of my laughter.

Ms. Carter led us into a classroom and let us each pick our seats. Each table had four chairs and a different color. Bella and Edward sat on one end of the yellow table, and Jasper and I sat on the other.

I was nervous in the morning, but as the day went by, I kept having more and more fun. By the time recess came, I was happy as Pixie that one time that she caught a mouse under the frigerator at home.

I was skipping alone around the grass, singing my _Mary Alice had a Little Cat _song when someone pushed me over. I fell onto the floor.

"Ouch!" I screamed. "Hey, what's the big idea?" I looked around, searching for the person who had pushed me down. I looked up and saw three girls—much taller than I was—standing over me, laughing.

"Nice job, sisters," the brown haired girl in the middle said. Her eyes were green, like Edward's, but they weren't nice like his were. They were mean eyes.

I stood up and wiped my hands on my skirt and started to walk away, but another one of the girls—a blonde one with the same mean green eyes—grabbed my arm and threw me on the floor.

"Hey!" I pouted. "Why'd you do that?" I tried to stand up again, but the third girl _kicked me down_. I scraped my knee when I hit the floor, and it started bleeding. Her hair was blonde, too, but her eyes were brown.

"Because we don't like you," she said.

"Why don't you like me?" I asked "I don't even know you!"

"Our sister, Maria," she said, putting a hand on the brown haired girl's shoulder, "likes Jasper and wants to be his best friend."

"So?" I asked, not even trying to stand up again, knowing I'd end up on the ground anyway. "What does that have to do with me?"

"Jasper can't have two best friends, duh," the brown eyed blonde said.

"Even a little girl like you should know _that_," the other blonde said.

"So right, Nettie," the Maria girl said. "Right, Lucy?"

"Right," the one named Lucy said. The three girls were smiling meanly down at me. I didn't like it. I stood up on my tippy toes to try and look them in the face.

"I have more than one best friend," I said. "I have… five. Jasper, Edward, Bella, Rosalie, and Emmett." I counted them off on my fingers.

Maria flipped her hair. "You're not supposed to," she said. "It's against the rules."

"What rules?" I asked.

Maria stared at me, and I knew I had her there.

"Besides," Nettie said, "Bella can't be your best friend. She's your sister."

"So?" I said. "Just 'cause Bella's my sister. That doesn't mean she can't be my best friend."

"Yes it does," Lucy said. "And Emmett and Rosalie can't be your best friends, either, because they're older."

"Why does it matter?" I asked.

"It just does, stupid!" Maria screamed, shoving me back.

"Hey," someone said. "Stupid is a mean word."

Maria and her sisters looked behind them and saw Jasper staring at them. I thought he looked like Superman.

"Hi, Jasper," Maria said, skipping up to him. "I'm Maria. Will you be my friend?"

"No," he said. **(That won't be particularly funny to you unless you watch Vampire Knight XD) **"Now stop being mean to my best friend."

"But I thought _I _was your best friend," Maria said, pouting.

"You were never my best friend," he said. "Now y'all should get outta here, because I can't hit a girl, but Emmett's done it lotsa times."

With a small scream, the three girls ran away. Jasper pulled me into a hug and squeezed me tightly. Bella and Edward came running over to us.

"What happened?" Bella asked. "Ali, you okay?" She touched my hair.

"I'm okey-dokey," I said. "Three girls were being mean to my, but Jazz helped me."

"Where are they?" Bella asked. Her face was red, but I knew she wasn't blushing. Bella was mad.

I looked around the playground and pointed at the group of mean, laughing girls. "Over there," I said. "But, Bella please don't do nothing." We started walking over to them anyway. "Don't be mean like them."

"Hmph," Bella said. "Fine. But if they pick on you again, they'll hear from me."

"What does that mean?" Edward asked.

Bella shrugged. "How should I know? Daddy says it when he gets mad at people."

"Hm, so does my daddy," Edward said.

We were getting closer to Maria and her sisters. Maria turned and saw me. Then, she threw herself on the ground. Without thinking about it, I ran toward her with Jasper, Bella, and Edward on my heels.

"Maria!" I yelled. "Are you okay?" She was crying. Ms. Carter hurried over to us.

"What happened?" she asked.

Maria stood up and leaned against Nettie, wiping her tears.

"Well, I was just here talking to my sisters, and Alice came over and started calling me names, then she pushed me down," she sobbed.

"I did not!" I screamed. "Liar!"

"Alice, we don't call people names, and we don't push people," Ms. Carter said. "Now, I want you to go inside and sit in the timeout corner."

"But—but, I didn't do it," I said, trying not to cry.

"Yes she did!" Lucy said.

"Yeah!" Nettie agreed. "We saw her!"

"No I didn't!" I said. "I was over there!" I pointed to the spot where we'd been walking. "With my friends! I wouldn't push her down! _She _pushed _me _down. She and her sisters were picking on me!"

"Alice, it's not good to lie," Ms. Carter said. "Nettie, Lucy, and Maria say that you pushed Maria down. Why would they lie about that?"

"Because they don't like her!" Bella said.

"That's not true," Maria said. "I wanted to be her friend. I haven't said a word to her."

"No!" Edward said. "_They _picked on _her_!"

"Now, hold it, hold it," Ms. Carter said. "Edward, were you there when Alice was supposedly pushed down by these girls?"

"Well, no, but—"

"Then how do you know that it actually happened?" she asked him.

"Because Alice told me so, and I believe her!" he said.

"I saw it happen!" Jasper said.

"And how do I know you're not just trying to protect her, Jasper?" Ms. Carter asked.

"Because!" Jasper said. "She didn't do anything! Alice, show her your knee!"

I pulled up on my dress and showed Ms. Carter my bloody knee. She still didn't look like she believed me.

"Even if Maria did push her down, which I'm not saying she did, then there's still the matter of Maria being pushed down. Why would Maria blame Alice for pushing her down if she didn't?"

"Because she doesn't like her!" Bella said again.

"Don't believe them, Ms. Carter!" Lucy said. "They're liars, all four of them!"

"Alice, for the final time, I want you to go inside and sit in the timeout corner until recess is over. Then, I will give you a note to give to your mother, explaining what you did," Ms. Carter said. A tear ran down my face.

"Okay," I sniffled. I ran back to the room, crying. I didn't do anything! Maria and her sisters were evil. I didn't like them, and I had a very strong feeling I never would.

"Ms. Carter, that wasn't fair!" I heard Jasper scream angrily. "She didn't do anything!"

"Why don't you go join her in the timeout corner?" Ms. Carter said. "Maybe that will teach you not to yell at your teacher! And you, young man, will also be getting a note to your mother. Go, now!"

I sat down in the timeout corner and put my head in my hands. It was my first day of kindergarten and I was already in trouble for something I _didn't even do_. I hoped Momma wouldn't be upset, and that she'd believe me. Eventually, Jasper sat next to me.

"Hi, Alice," he said.

"Hey, Jazz," I said. "Can you believe this?"

He sighed. "Nope."

"You didn't have to stand up for me, ya know."

"I know. I wanted to."

"Why?"

"Because you're my friend, and I don't want you to be wrongly accused of doing something."

"Thanks." I gave him a big hug and left my head on his shoulder. We sat quietly for a while, listening to the sounds of kids playing outside. I didn't really care—Jasper was with me.

"Hey, Jazz," I said, "How old do ya have to be to love someone?"

"My momma says that love don't 'criminate 'gainst age. I think that means anyone can love someone."

"Oh," I said. "In that case, I love you, Jasper."

"I love you, too, Alice," he said.

"Now that I think about it," I said. "I love Edward and Rosalie and Emmett, too."

Jasper laughed. "Yeah. I love my friends, too."

I gave him a tight squeeze. "But I love you more."

"Me too, Alice," he said. "Me too."

**Author's Note: Okay, seriously, dude, if I don't get ten reviews for this chapter, I'm not posting more. Sorryyy but I'm too obsessed with reviews XD Anyway, hope ya liked the chapter. The whole Maria thing with Alice actually happened to me on my first day in kindergarten, except it was five girls, and they harassed me cuz I was smart and cuz I wore boys clothes o_O **

**And, before anyone asked, no, I am not doing just one chapter per age. I'm gonna skip around eventually. **

**Reviews are love!!!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Alice's POV – Age Six**

"How was school?" Esme asked as Rosalie, Emmett, Edward, Bella, Jasper, and I piled into her car after school. She'd become our regular caretaker now, since she was the only one of our parents who didn't work.

"Boring," Rose sighed. "Alexis was being stupid again because she's jealous of the fact that I'm pretty and she's not. Isn't that right, Em?"

Rosalie turned to Emmett who nodded. Rose and Emmett were in the third grade. The rest of us were in second. Lots of girls were jealous of Rose nowadays. I didn't blame them. Rosalie got prettier and prettier as the days went by. Emmett, on the other hand, just got taller.

"Rosalie, you know your mother wouldn't like hearing you talk like that," Esme scolded.

"I know, Esme," Rose sighed, crossing her legs. "I know."

"And how are things in the second grade?" Esme asked, clearly to Edward, Bella, Jasper, and me.

"Same old, same old," I said just as Esme turned onto the road that would lead to the Cullen house. "I wish school had a little more excitement!"

Emmett chuckled. "It's school, Alice," he said. "What do you expect?"

I shrugged and Jasper put one arm around me. I rested my head on his shoulder—something we did all the time. Kids in our class teased us a lot, but we didn't care. We were friends, and that wasn't gonna change just because of some mean kids.

"Alright, kids, out of the car," Esme said when she pulled into the driveway. We all piled out of her SUV and started our daily routine of running up to the door. The first person who got there got to pull the key out from under the mat. As always, Emmett beat us there.

"No fair!" Edward protested.

"Yeah, he got out of the car first!" Bella added.

Esme sighed. "Emmett, you've opened the door everyday this week already," she said. "Give the key to someone else."

"Fine," Emmett grunted. "I pick..."

I looked at him with my puppy-dog eyes. No one could resist the puppy-dog eyes! Especially not coming from me! I was too cute.

But Emmett didn't even look at me. "Rose!" he decided. Rosalie squealed and took the key from his hands, putting it into the keyhole.

"Thanks, Em," she said before opening the door. We all walked inside and started to run up the stairs.

"I'm making lunch for you kids!" Esme called. "Anything you guys want?"

"Anything!" we all said at the same time. Anything Esme made was delicious, so was there really a point in having favorites?

We started the daily routine. Eddie and Bella hurried into his room where Claire de Lune started playing a few minutes seconds later. Edward had been taking piano lessons, and Claire de Lune had been the first song he'd learned to play. He was trying to write something himself, but he wasn't quite there yet.

Emmett took Rosalie into his room, and Jasper and I went into the loft and sat at the window seat. I curled my legs under me and rested against the wall.

"Look, Jazz!" I said, pointing out the window. On one side of the sky, the sun was shining orange in the fall sky, but on the other side, the moon could still be seen.

"The moon forgot to go to sleep," I giggled.

"Yes, it did," he said. I turned away from the window and saw him looking at me.

"Jazz, you're not even looking at it!" I squeaked. I leaned forward and grabbed his face, turning it toward the still-visible moon.

"Oh, yeah," he said. "You're right, Alice."

I laughed. "I'm always right."

I stared out the window for a long time. The sky was perfect, looking like a water color picture. I started thinking about Cinderella, my favorite fairytale. I could've sworn I saw Cinderella and the prince dancing in the sun, but the prince had honey blonde hair and Cinderella was short with pixie, black hair. I hoped that when I got married, I could have my princess wedding. Cinderella got her happily ever after; I wanted mine, too.

"_Swirling shades of blue slow dancing in your eyes_," I sang absentmindedly as my fantasy in the sun's colors continued. "_Sun kisses the earth and I hush my urge to cry_."

"You have a very pretty voice, Alice," Jasper said. My princess fairytale disappeared and all that was left was Jasper and me—but, then again, that was what had been there all along. Just Jazz and me; two best friends ignoring homework and wasting time. Wasn't life great?

"Kids!" Esme called. "Food's ready!"

Jasper and I joined the stampede from the hallway to the stairs to the kitchen, where the six of us sat down at our usual spots. Esme gave us each a plate of pasta with a white sauce that we finished quickly. Emmett even asked for seconds. I, on the other hand, was _still _too small to fit so much food into me at once. Bella was growing, so why wasn't I?

"Esme, why aren't I growing?" I asked her. She was the wife of a doctor, so she would know, right?

Esme smiled. "It's because you take after your mother, dear," she said, smiling. "She was very small when she was your age. I remember, in the fifth grade, when we had to get weighed and measured, your mother was the shortest and lightest girl in the class." Esme laughed. "Your father liked that about her."

"Oh," I sighed, smiling dreamily. I loved hearing stories about my parents.

"Yes, Erik was quite the sucker for the small ones," she laughed.

"Esme, why aren't I small?" Bella asked.

"Because you, Bella, take after your father when it comes to height," Esme said. "You'll be tall as a tree before you know it."

Bella cringed into Edward. "I don't wanna be tall as a tree!" she said. "That's too big."

"Bella, Esme's just exaggerating," Rosalie said, rolling her eyes. "Right, Esme?"

"Right," Esme said.

"Oh," Bella said, blushing in embarrassment.

"Alright, you kids can go back upstairs," Esme said. "I'll clean up."

We all started to run out of the kitchen.

"Hold it!" Esme called. "What do you say?"

"Thank you, Esme," we all said before continuing up the stairs.

Jazz and I ran back into the loft just in time to watch the sun go down.

"Jazz, have I told you lately that I love you?" I asked him.

He smiled widely. "Not lately," he said, brushing his hair out of his face.

"Oh," I said. "In that case, love you, Jazz!"

He laughed and ruffled my hair. "Love you, too, Alice," he said. I swatted his hand away.

"No touching the hair!" I teased. "I work hard on it."

Jazz chuckled. "Hey, Alice, I have somethin' I wanna give you," he said.

"Oohh," I said. "What is it?"

"Close your eyes," he said.

"'Kay," I said. I squeezed my eyes shut and waited as he took my arm and fastened something around my wrist

"M'kay, now, open," he said. I opened my eyes and gasped.

"Jazz!" I squealed. "It's so pretty!" There was a white pearl bracelet on my wrist now and it sparkled, even in the dim light. It was a little big for my tiny, tiny wrist, but I'd grow into it.

I gave Jasper a big hug as I continued to stare at the pearls.

"My dad gave that bracelet to my mom when they were seven," he said. "They'd been best friends, too."

My head snapped up. "Jazz, since we're best friends, does that mean we're gonna have to get married?"

Jasper thought about it for a second. "I don't think so," he said. "My aunty Lidia was best friends with my dad, too, but my dad didn't marry her. But she was my momma's bride-maid when she married my daddy, though."

"Oh," I said. "Jazz, when I get married, will you be a bride-maid?"

"I don't think it's called a bride-maid for boys, Alice," he said. "I think it's called a best man."

"Then will you be a best man?" I asked hopefully.

"Sure," he said, smiling.

I sighed. "I want a fairytale wedding!" I said. "Like Cinderella had! With the big, white dress and everything!"

"Sounds nice," Jasper said.

"How can you tell who will marry you?" I asked.

"I don't know," he said, shrugging. "I don't think you can tell till the day it happens."

"Aw," I said. "I wanted to know." Tears formed in my eyes. Jasper hugged me.

"Don't cry, Alice," he said. "You like surprises, dontcha? Well, that way, it'll be a surprise."

I sniffled. "A surprise?"

"Yeah, a surprise," he said. "Like the ones you get for your birthday!"

I smiled. "That'll be fun! I always love surprises!"

"Kids!" Esme called. "Your parents are here!"

A chorus of "Aww" drifted out of all the rooms, but reluctant steps started down the stairs anyway. Mine and Bella's daddy and Claudia were in the doorway.

"Daddy!" Bella and I exclaimed when we saw him. We ran toward him and gave him a hug.

"Alice, Bella!" He laughed. "Did you girls have fun?"

We both nodded.

"Do you want to stay?"

We nodded even faster.

"Well, too bad," he said. "We have to get home."

"Aww," I said. "Daddy! You tricked us!"

He laughed. "I'm sorry. Now, say goodbye to your friends so we can go."

We all said our goodbyes, and I made sure I gave Jasper an extra big hug and another thank you for the bracelets before we got in the car and drove away.

"Daddy, looky what Jazz gave me!" I said, showing him the bracelets.

"Oh, they're beautiful, Alice," he said. "Did you say thank you?"

"Only a million times," Bella snickered.

"And Jazz said he would be the best man at my wedding!" I added.

My daddy sighed. Then, he said something I didn't understand, and hardly heard.

"Oh, he'll probably be much more than just the best man."

I turned to Bella with a confused look on my face. She shrugged.

Oh, well; I figured I'd find out one day.

**A/N: Sorry it was kinda short, and kinda a filler chapter. I promise there will eventually be a chapter with a real point to it XD **

**Reviews are love!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Alice's POV – Age Eleven**

"Hey, Mom," I said when I opened the front door. Bella, Jasper, and Edward followed me inside.

"Hey girls, home so early?" She gave Bella and me a peck on the cheek.

"Minimum day, remember?" Bella said.

"Oh, that's right," she said. "Sorry I didn't go pick you girls up. I had so much to do here at home." After quitting her job a few years back, Mom was working on a wedding planning business at home. She and Esme were partners.

"Oh, you four are so wet," she fussed. "I didn't think it was going to rain. I would've given you an umbrella."

I laughed. "You worry too much, Mom," I said. "We love the rain."

"Maybe you do," Bella muttered. "Rain is the only thing in the world I honestly hate.

"And snow," Edward said.

"And wind," I added.

"Don't forget the cold in general," Jasper chuckled.

Bella grimaced. "Whatever."

Mom laughed. "Are Emmett and Rosalie coming over again?"

"Of course!" I said, dropping my polka-dot backpack on the floor. "In fact, I think they'll be at the door in a few seconds."

The doorbell rang. My mom eyed me appreciatively.

"Nice job, Alice," she complimented as she started for the door. "You should work on that. You could set up a psychic hotline."

I beamed and Rose came into the house, followed by a drenched Emmett. Rose, on the other hand, had not a single drop of water on her. I could relate—I wouldn't want to get any water on that Juicy Couture track suit, either. Emmett dropped an umbrella on the floor.

"Middle school is so lame," Rose complained. "Alice, you're so lucky you don't have to go until next year."

Forks Elementary went up to sixth grade, sadly. None of us could stand the stupid school, and the kids in our grade were a bunch of sick-minded, perverted fools. Don't get me wrong, they were definitely entertaining, but had the maturity of four year olds who'd watched too many R rated movies.

"I think we could hold up," I contradicted. "I'd rather be bored from the lack of drama."

"Drama Queen," Jasper muttered.

"Oh, little brother, some day you'll understand," Rose sang.

"Like you're so mature," he answered.

Rose flipped her hair. "Of course I am."

"Sure you are," Jazz whispered under his breath.

"Hey, Rose, did you happen to see Pixie out there?" I asked. "She doesn't like the rain. I should bring her back in."

Rose shook her head. "Didn't see her. Look out the window. Maybe you'll find her."

Pixie was still the fattest cat in the world. She was a lazy thing, and didn't like to play much anymore, but I still loved her. I wandered over to the window, running my fingers through my hair. No need for knots.

I pulled the curtains to the side so I could look out the window. There was a car flipped over in front of my house, and next to it, was a flattened, lifeless piece of black fur.

"Pixie!" I screamed, dashing for the door. I didn't care about my hair anymore—and that was definitely a first for me. I didn't care about anything except my cat.

Some people might have said I was too old to have an attachment to a pet as much as I did with Pixie. But I'd had her for nine years, and I loved her. So as I ran out into the middle of the street, I cried. A lot.

"She's gone," I sobbed, kneeling down next to her body. I felt the presence of several people behind me, but I only cared about one. I turned and cried on the shoulder I knew was there—the shoulder that was always there.

"Don't cry," Jasper whispered, stroking my hair. At times like that, I didn't care about all the teasing we received at school about supposedly being together. I knew that if any of the kids in my class that lived on my street happened to go outside at that moment and see us, they'd say something completely retarded like "Aw, comforting your girlfriend, Jazz?" or something equally immature. I just put my arms around him as he put his arms around me and cried.

I was soaked to the bone, but I didn't care.

"Alice, honey, come inside," my mom said. "I'll take care of Pixie."

"No," I croaked.

Mom sighed. "Jasper, Bella, can you take her inside, please?"

"Sure, Mom," Bella said. I could hear her tears, too, but they were no where near as bad as mine. Bella had loved Pixie, but not as much as I had. She'd always wanted a dog, but Pixie had been my dream pet.

I was small enough that Jasper was able to lift me up off the floor.

"I can walk," I muttered when Bella put one hand on my elbow to steady me.

Once inside, I shook off Bella's comforting hug and ran up the stairs. I threw myself facedown on my bed and cried.

There was a knock at my door.

"Go away, Bella," I muttered.

"Come on, Pixie, don't be like that." Jasper opened the door and let himself in. I rubbed at my eyes, trying to erase the tears. I didn't want him to see me cry—not this much.

"Alice, I've seen you cry before," he said. "I've known you since we were three, remember?"

I sniffled and nodded, keeping my eyes on my hands. He sat down next to me, and I curled up my legs to meet my chest.

"Your mom said she was taking you and Bella to the pound tomorrow to see if you guys want to adopt another pet," he said.

I looked up at him, rage-filled tears in my eyes. "She may as well tell me I can still keep Pixie, even though she's dead," I muttered.

"I'm really sorry, Alice," he said. "You know that if I could bring her back I would."

I rested my head on his shoulder, something I'd been doing since we were little, something that had always comforted me. Jasper always seemed to have the right aura coming off of him. If I was sad, he'd be projecting happiness. If I was uncomfortable, he'd send comfort my way. It was one of the things I loved about him.

"Can you come with us tomorrow?" I asked. "Please? I need you there."

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I don't know if I can, Alice. It's Saturday, so my mom might need my help with cleaning."

I looked up at him pleadingly.

"Jazz, please."

"I'll ask," he promised. "But I can't guarantee you anything."

I smiled sadly. "Thanks."

We spent the rest of the evening in my room. He made me talk about Pixie. At first, I could've sworn he was trying to make me feel worse, but thinking about all the memories that little cat had made in my life had actually made me happier. And the next day, when he called to say that Claudia was going to let him come, I was completely drowned in relief.

He rode in the back seat with me while Bella rode in the front with my mom. I could tell she was trying not to bounce with excitement for my sake.

Normally, something like this would raise my perk level, especially since shopping for the new puppy would be a necessity afterwards. But although the pain had somewhat eased off, it still hurt thinking that Bella and Mom were able to replace Pixie so quickly.

We parked in front of the pound and I got out begrudgingly and walked across the gravel with my hands in my pockets. Jasper walked next to me with his arm hooked around mine.

"Excuse me, we're here to look at dogs," Mom said to the lady at the front desk. She didn't even look up from her computer.

"Please proceed through the wooden double doors and if you find a dog you like, please write down the number on his collar and bring it here," she said.

My mom nodded and we followed her through the doors and into an outdoor kennel.

"Alice, why don't you help your sister look at dogs?" Mom suggested.

"Sure," I grumbled. I towed Jasper along with me.

Bella wasn't usually the one to show loads of excitement—not compared to me, anyway—but her face lit up like the sun when she laid her eyes on a russet colored pup. I had to admit, he was quite adorable, and his little ears lifted when Bella approached. He stood from his sitting position and pushed his nose through the chain-link fence.

"Hey, boy," Bella cooed. She petted his muzzle. "You're so adorable! Mom!"

I bit down on my lip and let go of Jasper and started walking away. I could wait inside.

"Alice," Jasper called after me. "Come one. Smile. Sadness isn't a nice color on you," he teased.

I sighed. "I'm not sad," I clarified.

He sighed, too. "I know," he said. "You're upset, but not exactly sad, right?"

I forced a smile for him. "Right." He read me so well.

Mom and Bella soon came back through the door. They gave the woman the number for the russet colored hound and she went out back to get him. She brought him back on a leash, and left to do other things, and a lady with a much better attitude took her place.

"So, what do you want to name her, sweetie?" she asked Bella. Bella stared at her incredulously for a second—I knew how much she hated when people called her 'sweetie' or 'honey' or something equally demeaning—before actually thinking about the dog's name.

"Jacob," she decided. "His name is Jacob."

"Jacob," the woman repeated with a smile as she wrote down his name on the adoption papers. "Very nice."

She made Bella do this dorky pledge that only kids were supposed to do, and I fought back the urge to scream, _Lady, we're not two years old!_ I bit my lip to hide my giggles when Bella had to jump in a little circle. Bells looked like she was ready to flip that woman off.

When the woman—who I eventually recognized as Jessica Stanley's mother—turned her back, Bella stuck her tongue out at her.

"That's my sis," I whispered to her. She smiled proudly.

Since Bella holding a bunch of papers, Mrs. Stanley handed Jacob to me. The pup was—I had to admit—cute and cuddly and he barked merrily all the way to the car.

"Here, Jazz, you hold him," I suggested once we sat down. I sat Jacob in his lap. Jacob jumped off the seat and made his way over to Bella.

"He loves you, Bells," my mom said, laughing.

I laughed, too, and so did Jasper. I rested my head against his shoulder again, wanting to feel the familiar comfort.

"Did I ever tell you that you're the brother I always wanted?" I asked him.

He chuckled. "Only a few times," he said.

I laughed, and my usual perky Alice-ness returned. I was glad I was back—I'd missed myself.

"Love ya, Jazz," I said through my laughter.

"Love you, too, Alice," he said back.

**A/N: *giggleattack* Sorry for anyone who was expecting Jacob to be in this story in human form. I dislike the guy, so he's a dog! ^_^ Reviews are love!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Alice's POV – Age Fourteen**

"Alice, stop it!" Bella whined. "It's just the spring fling! I can't believe you're even making me go!"

I ignored her. "Part your lips, please," I said. She sighed, but did as I said anyway.

Rose, Bella, and I were in the bathroom in the Cullen house getting ready for the first dance of the year. Forks Junior High went from seventh through ninth grade—for a reason no one exactly understood—and normally, the eighth graders and ninth graders had separate dances, but—after some debating on the matter—the school decided to merge it into one. It was a formal dance—all the more fun for me.

Rose and I were pretty much ready, but Bella was being a baby about it, so she was taking a lot longer.

"Come on, Bella, play nice," Rose said. "Edward won't be able to resist you when we're done with you."

Bella's cheeks reddened and that gave me the perfect place to add the blush. I dusted some on her cheeks.

Bella started to squirm as I mercilessly pulled the rollers out of her hair.

"Please, Bella," I said, crouching down a bit so I was level with her. I gave her my puppy dog eyes.

She pursed her lips, but nodded anyway. I smiled, pleased with myself. No one could resist the puppy dog eyes, especially not on me.

"There… we… go! Bells, you're perfect," I declared, stepping back. I'd covered the mirror with a sheet, so when Bella turned to see her reflection, she was instantly disappointed.

"I'll let you see yourself soon enough," I promised. "Let's go get dressed. Esme put our dresses in the loft."

I skipped out of the bathroom and down the hall. I opened the door to the loft and handed a garment bag to Bella, then one to Rose. The last one was mine. Esme had taken me shopping for the dresses earlier that day, since Mom had to work again.

Rosalie and Bella walked out of the room with a thankful glance in my direction which I returned with one of my million dollar Alice smiles. Inside, I was nervous. There was something I planned on doing tonight, and I needed to look perfect for it.

I pulled the dress out of the bag, slipped off my robe, and slipped into the garment. It had been a huge trouble to get one in my size—an extra-extra-small—but eventually I was able to buy it. The green, satin, strapless dress fit me perfectly and I'd added the crystal brooch to the sash for a special touch. I could only pray it looked as perfect as it felt. I needed to look absolutely stunning. If I had anything to say about it, this night was going to be my first—

"Oh, Alice, this dress is absolutely perfect!" Rosalie said, twirling into the room. "You did such a great job picking it out!"

I smiled and gave her a hug. "You look gorgeous, Rose!"

I'd picked a pink strapless dress for her with a black lace waist with black tulle under the skirt to make it poufy.

"Where's Bella?" I asked.

Rose sighed. "Probably battling with that zipper."

"No I am not!" Bella stated as she walked into the room. "I was able to pull up the zipper myself, thank you very much. And, Alice, I have to admit, this dress is amazing."

I beamed. I knew she'd like it. It was royal blue, strapless like mine, and went down to her knees. There was a sparkling crystal belt at the waist.

We went back to the bathroom where we removed the sheet from the mirror and spent at least half an hour perfecting ourselves.

"And the final touch," I said. "Sparkles for the hair! Angela's on the prom committee and she said that they were putting sparkles on the floor because the lighting made them look like diamonds." I sprinkled some on my hair, then on Bella's, then Rose's.

"Stunning," I said, internally pleased at my work. Rosalie looked like a movie star and Bella looked like a princess.

And me? No, I wasn't all that vain, but I knew I looked beautiful. Oh, I just hoped he'd think so, too…

"Alright, let's get out of here," Rose said, slipping on a long-sleeved, black mini sweater. She handed identical ones to Bella and me.

We walked out of the bathroom and, instead of making our way down the stairs, we leaned against the railing until Carlisle, Esme, my mom and dad, Claudia, Richard, Jasper, Edward, and Emmett looked up.

"Oh, my, girls!" Esme gasped. "Don't you look lovely!"

I smiled widely and started down the stairs. Rose and Bella came behind me.

"Marissa, are those really our little girls?" Dad asked my mom.

"Oh, they can't be!" Mom said.

"You're right, Marissa," Claudia added. "Someone took our little girls and replaced them with little ladies! Don't you agree, Esme?"

"Oh, certainly." Esme nodded. "There is no way these can be our little thirteen year olds."

I laughed. "Oh, you're acting like we're five years old," I said. "Right, Rose?"

But Rose wasn't listening to me. She was too busy staring at Emmett to acknowledge anything else that was going on. I smiled wider. Emmett and Rose were together—and everyone knew about it, parents included—but I guess they all thought it was too cute to think much of it. To say the truth, so did I.

I was about to turn to Bella for backup, but she threw herself at Edward before I could get a word out. Bella liked Edward, and Edward liked her back, but they hadn't made any progress on the whole dating thing. My dad cleared his throat when Bella seemed to have held on to Edward for too long. She blushed.

And I skipped over to my best friend in the entire world. I grabbed Jasper's hand and gave him a peck on the cheek, just like I always did. Dad didn't care because I sorta did that to everyone.

"Look at you, Jazz," I said, eyeing his sleek look. "You look so nice, everyone will think you were dressed by me."

He chuckled. "I assume that's a compliment."

"Of course," I said with a nod. Jasper looked especially polished tonight. He was wearing a vest that was a darker green than the Forks forests over a long sleeved, white collared shirt.

"Pictures!" Claudia declared. She waved a camera around in the air.

"Oh, I almost forgot," Mom said, digging in her purse until she found her camera. Esme found hers, too.

"Alright, kids, squeeze together," Esme instructed. I linked my arm through Jasper's and smiled for the picture.

"One… Two… Three!"

Three cameras went off several times, momentarily blinding me.

Our moms took pictures of Emmett and Rose, Edward and Bella, then Jazz and me. When our parents had their backs turned, Emmett and Rose sneaked a kiss. I sighed happily—they were too cute. I looked over at Bella, and wondered when she and Edward were going to finally get together. Those two were a match made in heaven.

"Alright, we better get going," Esme said. "Don't want you kids to be late."

"Oh, so we're kids again," Emmett joked. We all laughed and waved goodbye to our parents before walking outside into the chilly night and climbing into Esme's car.

She drove us to school where a bunch of kids were already standing outside, waiting for the doors to open. Among the heads I spotted Angela Webber and Ben Cheney—two of the few decent people in our school. Maria and her sisters stood nearby in matching dresses, and started whispering when they saw me. Typical—I brushed them off.

When the doors opened and everyone poured into the gym, I was immediately impressed with how well the transformed the place.

"May I have this dance?" Emmett asked Rose. She laughed at his attempt at being formal, but nodded anyway. They made their way onto the dance floor and I couldn't help but let out a tiny squeal. I knew those two were going to end up together forever, and I could not wait to plan their wedding!

After a bit of playful arguing, Edward took Bella to dance, too, leaving Jasper and me alone.

"Would you like to dance?" Jazz asked.

I smiled at him. "Sure."

He took my hand and we walked to the edge of the dancing crowd and started swaying to the rhythm of the music.

"Jazz, there's something I wanna tell you," I said.

"What's that?"

I bit my lip. "Mm, never mind."

He chuckled. "Come on, Alice, you can't just leave me hanging like that."

I clicked my tongue. "Watch me."

"Please," he said. "_Please_."

I laughed. "Oh, fine." I paused and lowered my voice. "There's… a guy here tonight, and I really like him, but I don't know if he likes me back."

Jazz smiled. "And who would that be?"

"I'm not telling," I sang.

"You'll tell," he said, pushing some hair out of his eyes. "Especially if you're getting tickled."

He tickled me right under my ribs and I couldn't help the hysterical giggles.

"Alright, alright, alright!" I screamed, pulling his hands down. "Alright."

He grinned, accomplished.

"Well… he's blonde," I hinted. "And his name is—hey, Peter!"

Peter, a sweet boy in my Spanish class, was walking toward us.

"Hey, Alice," he said to me with a smile. "Jazz."

"Hi, Peter," Jazz muttered.

"Mind if I cut in?" Peter took one of my hands from Jazz's and started to pull me away. Jasper nodded grimly and stepped away. I turned to Peter just as the first slow song of the night started playing. Perfect.

"How are things, Peter?" I asked. "I missed you in Spanish today."

"My mom was sick," he said. "She wanted me to stay home with her."

"Oh," I said, nodding. "Is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine," he said.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jasper dancing with Maria. She was laughing. Why would Jazz be dancing with Maria? It wasn't like I _like _liked Jazz, but it hurt a bit, considering all the crap Maria had put me through since kindergarten. I turned back to Peter, trying to shrug off what I'd seen. I knew I was probably just stalling because I was nervous. I liked Peter—he was sweet, funny, and cute. And if my sources told the truth, he liked me, too.

"Listen, Peter," I said. "There's something I wanna give you."

"Yes?"

I bit down on my lip for a second, trying to kill the nerves.

I stretched up on my toes and gave Peter a kiss. When I pulled back, he blinked several times before grinning widely.

"You've got to love middle school," he said.

I laughed. "I know, right?"

We danced for a while longer, talking and laughing the entire time. Eventually, Jasper cut in.

"Alice, can I talk to you?" he asked politely.

"Mm hm." I nodded and said goodbye to Peter before letting Jazz lead me off to a corner of the room where we resumed the dance we'd been having a while before.

"So… you and Peter," he said. "You like the guy?"

I nodded. "He's sweet. And you and Maria?"

"She ambushed me," he murmured. "I couldn't get rid of her."

I laughed. "Oh, thank heavens…"

"Why?" he mused. "Were you jealous?"

"What?" I asked, surprised. "Jealous? Me? No! Of course not! I was, ya know, just wondering."

He smirked. "Right."

I pouted. "It's true!"

Jasper chuckled. "Oh, I know, I know. Just teasing you, Pixie."

I pursed my lips. "Thanks, Jazz. Thanks."

"So you really like this guy, right?"

"I thought we had this established."

"We do, we do, I was just clarifying the matter."

I kissed his cheek. "Don't worry, Jazz. You'll always be my number one guy."

Jazz grinned. "I'm holding you to that."

"As you should."

We danced to one more song—One Man Drinking Games by Mayday Parade—before Rosalie came to tell us that Esme was here to pick us up. We'd had a curfew of nine o' clock because our parents didn't want us staying out too late, so none of us were surprised.

At the door, Peter caught up to us.

"Um, Alice, I don't know if you're doing anything next Friday, but a bunch of us are heading over to Seth's house for a spring break party," he said. Seth Clearwater was a boy from the reservation. I'd spent some time with him and his sister, Leah, as a kid, but only when Harry Clearwater—their dad—had come over to watch the Super Bowl with Carlisle, Richard, and my dad.

"I was just wondering if you could come," he said. When he caught sight of Jasper, he quickly added, "You can bring friends. I'm sure the Cullens and Hales would like to come. And your sister, too. Bella, right?"

"That's right," I said. "And I'm sure we'd all love to come. Right, Jazz?"

"Yeah," Jasper said stiffly. "Sounds fun."

"Great," Peter said, clasping his hands together. "So… see you then."

"See you."

We walked back out and got into the car where everyone was already waiting. Esme closed the side doors and we drove away.

"Alice has a boyfriend!" Emmett taunted immediately. Rosalie slapped his leg.

"Emmett, shut up," she said. Then, leaning over to whisper in my ear, "I want details, girl."

"Does she, now?" Esme laughed. She looked suspiciously at Jasper. "Will you tell me who, or will I have to guess?"

"It's Peter," Bella said.

"The Rinaldi boy," Esme gasped, surprise written all over her face. "Really?"

"Uh-huh," Emmett said. "I saw their make out session."

Esme's jaw dropped. "Alice!"

"It was not a make out session!" I said immediately. Somehow I knew Emmett was going to say that. More quietly I said, "It was just a little kiss."

"Oh, well, that's more reasonable," Esme said.

I laughed along with everyone else. Everyone else, except for Jazz, that is.

"Sorry I ditched you for a while tonight," I said to Jasper, laying my head on his shoulder. "I probably shouldn't have…"

"No, no," he said. "It was fine. You were happy, and I like seeing you happy."

"Thanks," I said. "Wish you'd been happy too."

"I was happy enough seeing you happy."

"You're so sweet."

I sighed and closed my eyes. I wasn't usually tired so early, but the day's events had worn me out. Hopefully, someone would wake me up if I fell asleep when we got home so I wouldn't have to be carried inside like some little girl. I tried to not even let myself fall asleep, but eventually, the ON switch in me was turned off and I slept the entire ride home with a smile on my face that even sleep couldn't remove.

**A/N: They're too cute. Hope you agree ;D I uploaded pictures of the girls' dresses onto the website, so you guys can go look at that. Please, readers, please, help me get to my goal of at least a hundred reviews soon! ^_^**


	6. Chapter 6

**Alice's POV – Age Fourteen**

"Hey, guys, glad you could make it."

Peter swung open the wooden side door for the six of us—Rosalie, Emmett, Edward, Bella, Jasper, and I—and we walked into the backyard of Seth Clearwater, where an entire party awaited.

There were kids everywhere, most of which I didn't know. Oh, well. I would get to know them today. Knowing it'd be more of a pool party, we all brought our swimsuits. Rose, Bella, and I were wearing ours under our clothes. Well, Bella and I were. Rosalie had her pink and white bikini top on display, and covered her matching skirted bottom with an equally pink sarong. Bella hid her navy blue and white bathing suit under a beach dress, and my pink, black, and white swimwear was covered by shorts and a tank top.

"Okay, so, refreshments are over there, the pool's open to all, and Mike's working the stereo," Peter said, cluing us in all the most important parts. "Have fun."

I smiled and bounced a bit as he walked away. As soon as he was out of earshot, I sighed and collapsed into a nearby beach chair. Peter and I had been going out since the night of the dance, and I could barely admit it to myself, but I really wasn't that into him—not as much as I thought I'd been. He was sweet and cute with his tousled head of blonde hair and his kind, hazel eyes, but there was no spark. I wanted a spark. Bella noticed my apprehensiveness and sat down cross legged next to me.

"What's up?" she asked. "Things like this usually get you going."

I sighed. "It's Peter," I confessed, and told her everything. She sat there, nodding, and actually listening, even though I knew guys weren't exactly her forte.

"Alice, the guy adores you," she said. "Have you seen the way he looks at you? He's, like, eternally devoted to you or something."

I grimaced.

"Hey, what's going on here?" Rosalie asked, walking over to us. She had three cokes in her hands. One was opened—hers—and she handed the other two to Bella and me. I opened mine and sipped it once before launching into the story again.

"Well, for one thing," Rosalie said between gulps of her drink, "I think Bella's totally right."

I pursed my lips. "We're fourteen, Rose. You guys make it sounds like he's in love with me."

"I'm not saying he is," Bella said. "But, then again, what if he was? Haven't you heard, Alice? Love doesn't discriminate against age."

"You've been reading my romance novels again, haven't you?" I teased. "And yes, I've heard that, but really. We're too young to be in love. Peter knows that, and I know that."

"Well there's _someone _who doesn't know that," Bella muttered suggestively. Rosalie elbowed her in the ribs.

I decided not to ask.

"Well, if you really don't like Peter as much as you think you did, then you should tell him," Rose said. "No use leading him on."  
"But I wouldn't know how to do it," I said nervously—and that was a big deal because, Alice Brandon? Never nervous. "I haven't had any experience with breakups."

"Well, I have," she said. "Remember Royce?"

"Oh, yeah, because _that _turned out brilliantly," Bella said. "He has everyone at school thinking you date older men."

"Hey, if you can deal with the rumors, then you can dump a trashy guy," Rose answered primly. "But Peter's not a trashy guy. I know his brother—he's in my math class—and if Peter's anything like his brother, then he's a perfect gentleman. I'm sure he'd understand, Alice."

"But… well… I can't do it _here_," I said. "I mean, come on, what if someone hears? They could make fun of him."

Bella sighed. "Kids our age are like monkeys—fun to watch, but annoying as hell when they're near you."

"I don't want to know where that analogy came from," Rose said, "I really don't, but, speaking of monkeys, would you look at Maria throwing herself all over my brother?"

I looked over to where Rose was gesturing, and I saw Maria's little brown haired head trying to have a conversation with Jasper. At first, I felt guilty—I'd completely been ignoring him this entire time—and then, I felt a pang of envy. I didn't know why it was there, so I did my best to push it away.

"Not like you care, though, right, Alice?" Bella said.

"Nope," I said. "Jasper can talk to whoever he wants to talk to. I don't mind."

Bella pursed her lips. "Sure thing."

I decided to turn the tables. "Bella, I've been meaning to ask you; how's it going with you and Edward?"

Bella blushed and her eyes fell on her hands. _How's it feel having the tables turned on you?_

"Fine," she muttered. I giggled.

"Oh, Bella, you know us," I said.

"Yeah, Bells, you know we don't take one word answers," Rose added with a laugh.

"It's just… fine," Bella insisted. "Nothing going on that's extremely important."

"Is that so?" I mused.

"Nothing like with Rose and Emmett," she said.

And so the tables turn again.

"Speaking of which, how was your date on Saturday?" Bella asked Rosalie mischievously.

Rose didn't seem phased. She actually seemed happy to launch into a minute-by-minute description of it. I listened with wide, happy eyes.

She'd just finished when the voice of a boy in our school, Mike Newton, rang loud enough for us to hear.

"Truth-or-dare!" he announced.

I looked excitedly at Bella and Rose before bouncing up out of my seat. They followed me—Bella begrudgingly—to where all the kids were sitting in a large circle. I sat next to Jasper.

"Sorry I've been ignoring you," I whispered to him. "Got caught up in girl talk."

He chuckled. "That's my girl."

I smiled.

It turned out; the game was more of a spin the bottle, truth-or-dare crossover. The one person who wasn't playing, Eric Yorkie, would spin an empty ketchup bottle and the person who it landed on first would say truth or dare to the second person the bottle would land on. I waited in anticipation as the bottle started spinning.

It landed on Lauren, an unimaginative blonde girl in our grade.

Eric spun the bottle again and it landed—miraculously—on me.

"Alice," Lauren said from across the circle, "truth or dare?"

I didn't hesitate. "Dare."

She grinned wickedly. "I dare you… to kiss Jasper!"

My jaw dropped halfway to the floor. Lauren smirked and crossed her arms across her chest. I had _not _seen that coming—and that was a big deal because I was Alice; the girl who saw everything coming.

I turned to Jasper, biting my lip. He chuckled at my expression.

"C'mon, Alice, I'm sure your boyfriend won't mind," he said.

Oh. I hadn't even thought about Peter. I snuck a peek over at him, and he smiled stiffly at me. Ugh, I was going to hurt him twice—once with this kiss, and another time when I broke up with him. Oh, boy.

I turned back to Jazz and leaned in. He closed the distance between us and we kissed. Something stirred in me, but I didn't pay much attention to it. Jasper was my best friend, and nothing more, no matter _what _Bella, or Rosalie, or Emmett, or my parents, or… ah, damn. Just thinking about it annoyed me. I pulled away and saw him smile at me. I returned the gesture and pulled a lock of honey blonde hair out of his face.

I didn't realize how close we'd still been until someone—more than likely Peter—cleared their throat. I sat back the way I'd been before and watched the game progress. Lauren's dare had given others some ideas, and it turned out that Jasper and I weren't the only ones who had to kiss each other. I sighed—teenagers.

After about fifteen minutes into the game, I couldn't stand Peter's upset eyes on me any longer. I stood and walked around the circle to him.

"Peter… can we talk?" I asked him.

His face lit up. "Sure, Alice."

He followed me to the shed in the corner of the yard. God, I didn't want to do this!

"What's up?" he asked when we were well out of earshot of anyone else.

"Peter," I said slowly, trying to put my thoughts into words. "I've been starting to think that… that night at the dance… I think me kissing you was a… mistake."

Something in his eyes seemed to shatter. He stared at me open-mouthed, waiting for me to continue. When I didn't say anything, he found his voice.

"I thought you liked me," he said.

"I do, I do," I said. "It's just… it's, well…"

"There's someone else, isn't there?" he guessed.

"What?" I asked, bemused. "No! No! There isn't, I swear. I just don't think it'll work out."

He sighed heavily and ran a hand through his tousled, damp hair.

"Alright," he said. "I get it."

"Oh, God," I groaned. "Peter, I really am sorry. I hope we can still be friends."

To my utter surprise, he smiled. "Sure, Alice," he said. "I'd like that."

I gave Peter one last hug before Bella called my name, saying that Mom had come to pick us up. I left him standing right there, and I didn't look back for fear of seeing any feelings he might've kept inside.

I caught up with Jasper and he immediately pulled me aside.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "I can feel your stress radiating off of you like crazy."

"Peter and I are over," I said truthfully, not even feeling like I wanted to try and cover it up.

"Really?" he asked. He sounded… amused? "I thought you liked him."

"I did," I said. "He just… wasn't the one. I want to go out with the person who will be _the _one."

He chuckled. "Bella was right. You are reading too many romance novels."

"Not funny," I said. "There was just no—"

"Spark," he finished for me. "I know."

I shook my head, smiling. "You know me too well."

We climbed into the car and my mom's phone started ringing before any of us could say anything.

"What?" Mom gasped into the phone. "Why?" Her voice quivered a bit, but I knew she was trying to hide it. I could only grasp her side of the conversation.

"Isn't there someone else who can take care of the house?

"Oh, that's not right.

"No, Claudia, don't—don't cry. You're going to make me cry too.

"No worried. I'll tell them."

She shut her phone and turned her body around. Her eyes were red.

"What happened to our mom?" Rosalie asked. "Is she okay?"

"Your mother is fine, Rosalie," Mom said.

"Then what is it?" Jasper demanded.

Mom sighed and blinked away a few tears. "It's just—she wanted me to tell you two that you and your parents are moving to Houston."


	7. Chapter 7

**Alice's POV – Age Fourteen**

I froze.

"What?!" Rosalie demanded.

"Your grandmother died, and she said in she will that her house was to go to your parents," Mom said gravely. "They're moving you guys to Houston until they can find someone to buy the house."

"But—" Rose's bottom lip was quivering. "But can't they take care of that from here? We don't have to move down there!"

"It was your grandmother's wish," Mom stated. "You know how much your dad loved to please her."

"You'd think her death would've made him get over that," Rose muttered. I knew she'd had ill feelings toward that woman since she'd called her fat at age seven.

Jasper was stiff by my side. Biting my lip, I put both my arms around him.

"It's okay," I murmured, even though I knew it wasn't. I was going to lose my best friend and that was certainly not okay. I fought back tears.

Mom explained everything as best she could. The Hales' plans were to not stay there forever, but just until they found someone to take the house off their hands.

"But that's going to take forever!" Rose cried through some tears. "No one's going to want to buy that ratty old house!"

I couldn't believe my ears. Jasper couldn't leave. He just couldn't! He was my best friend. I loved him so much—he was that brother I never had. I couldn't lose him.

"I'm sorry, Alice," he said in my ear, putting one arm around my shoulders. Those three words made my tears run free.

"Don't be," I said. "You won't be gone forever, right?"

Mom sighed before Jasper could answer. "Claudia said that if Richard likes it and no one wants the house, they might stay there."

_Please, please, please don't let that be the case!_ I thought to myself.

"When do we leave?" Jasper asked, brave as ever. I saw the tears in his eyes, and I saw how hard he was fighting to keep them back. I lifted one finger and wiped away a stray tear. He ran his fingers through my hair.

"Later today," Mom whispered; her voice cracking. "The moving van is all set up."

"What?" Rose half-shrieked. "How long did they wait to tell us?"

Mom bit her lip and turned onto our street. "A week."

"An entire _week_?" Rosalie asked, completely aghast. "How could they?"

"They didn't want you guys to try to fight your way out of it," Mom answered. I noticed that we'd driven past our house already and could see the Hale house in the distance. There was a moving van parked out front and I could faintly make out Jasper's parents taking boxes from the porch and putting them in the back of the large truck. Tears sprang to my eyes and I did everything I could to hold them back.

Mom opened the back doors for us and the first thing Rose did was storm over and start an argument with her mom.

"Rosalie, honey, I don't like it either," Claudia told her. "But we'll be back. Anyway, maybe going to Houston will be good for you. Maybe you can meet a nice boy—"

"I already met a nice boy," Rose said through gritted teeth. "His name's Emmett. Remember him?" Everyone kept walking into the house to sit on the remaining furniture to have a sort of last conversation, but I stayed behind. I had to hear this.

"I know, sweetie, but Emmett… he's just not the boy I pictured you with," Claudia sighed. "I imagined you'd be with someone mature and sophisticated. Someone who'd do you justice."

"You're right, Mom," Rose said. "Emmett doesn't do me justice. He's much too good for me."

"Rosalie Lillian Hale, you are too good for him," Claudia said sternly. "Now, what about Adrian King's boy?"

"Royce?!" Rose half-screamed. "There is no way in hell I will ever go out with him again!"

Claudia ignored her daughter's mild profanity and put her hands on her hips. "And why not?"

"Because he's a pig!" Rosalie answered. "You want me going out with a pig? Go rent one at the county fair, because I'd much rather date that than date Royce."

Claudia sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, eyes closed, trying to collect herself. "Rosalie, go inside so you can say goodbye to everyone," she finally said.

"Ugh!" Rose screamed before storming away. I tried to hide so she wouldn't see me, but she did. For a second, I worried she'd be mad, but she just hugged me and buried her face in my shoulder. I felt her tears soak through my shirt.

"It's okay," I said, gently rubbing her back. I took the hair tie I had on my hand and used it to tie Rose's hair into a ponytail. No use getting her hair all wet with tears.

"She can't make me!" Rose said. "She just can't! I won't give up on Emmett! I just won't!"

"No one said you had to, Rose," I said. "Your mom was just giving you her opinion."

Rose took a step away from me, and my heart swelled with sadness for her. Seeing Rosalie like this—perfect, beautiful, strong Rosalie—with her hair pulled back, her eyes swollen, her face tear-stained was a whole new experience. She looked so vulnerable, so… different.

"I'm really going to miss you, Alice," she said. "I promise I won't make a single new friend over there."

"Rose, you don't have to promise me that," I told her. "Make the most of the time you'll have over there. Don't be miserable. Now, come on, let's go inside. You should," I sighed, "say goodbye to everyone."

We walked inside and saw Claudia, Esme, and my mother in a corner of the room, talking and laughing and crying like the best friends they were and always had been. Richard, Carlisle, and my dad weren't showing as much emotion, but the heavy air was definitely between them as they tried to share a decent conversation. Rose and I made our way over to where Jasper, Bella, Edward, and Emmett were standing.

"This can't be it," I told Jasper. "You can't just leave."

"I'll be back," he said. The vacuity in his voice sent shivers up and down my spine. "This isn't the end. I'll see you again."

"I'm really going to miss you, Jazz," I said.

"Just promise me one thing."

"Of course."

He smiled my favorite smile and put one hand on my shoulder. "Don't make a new best friend."

I smiled back. "Don't worry," I said. "I won't."

We just stood there for a while. I stared into his blue eyes and saw all the memories we'd shared over the years. Was it possible that after—what was it?—eleven or so years we'd have to separate? I hoped he'd be back soon. Hell, I hoped he'd _be _back. What would I do if his parents liked it over there and decided they didn't want to sell the house? Who would be the best man at my wedding? Who would be my best friend? Bella was my twin, yeah, but Jasper was like my better half. I loved him too much.

"Write letters every now and then, okay?" I said. "Just so that I can make sure you haven't forgotten me yet."

He chuckled and ruffled my hair. "Yeah, Alice, because forgetting you is possible."

I grinned. "Well, then, pretend it is possible to forget darling little me and write a letter at least every month."

"Deal," he said. "As long as you write back."

"That won't be a problem," I assured him. "When do you guys leave?"

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair before checking his watch. "Won't be long now. Mom said' we'd leave around four o' clock and it's a quarter till then."

"Oh," I whispered. "Do you think you'll be able to sell the house? And don't lie to me, Jazz, because I'll know."

I felt like I already knew the answer, but I just needed to hear him say it. I think he knew that, too. "We can sell it, but it'll take more than a year to find someone who will really want it."

"Of course," I sighed.

"Rosalie, Jasper!" their father's voice called from the doorway. "Come on, kids, we have to go."

A tear slipped down my cheek as we all walked out of the empty house and into the yard. Even so, I was smiling. I was losing my best friend, but not forever. I knew they were going to come back, I could feel it. And I didn't care how long it took them, because as long as they came back, I'd get to see Jasper again, and I'd be happy.

Rosalie didn't seem to care that her parents were watching. She gave Emmett a huge hug and a kiss to match it. I made a mental note to send her a sketch of the dress I had in mind for her wedding.

Rose said goodbye to Bella before walking over to me. She started to pull the hair tie out of her hair, but I stopped her.

"Keep it," I said. "Use it to remember me."

She smiled and gave me a hug. Her body shook with tears. I smiled and bit back tears.

"Ah, Rose, you're gonna make me cry," I laughed. She laughed with me.

"Sorry," she said. "You know how much of a crybaby I am."

I giggled. "Yeah, I know. Now, if you find some cute cowgirl skirt in Houston that's my size, be sure to bring that home for me, okay?"

"That is such a stereotype," she accused, giggling with me. "But sure. If I find something like that in a size negative zero, I'll be sure to bring it to you."

I stuck my tongue out at her. "That's all I ask."

She'd stopped crying by then, and I was openly pleased with myself that I'd made her happy. She gave me another tight squeeze before reluctantly climbing into her mom's car. Her parents said goodbye to us, too. Soon, it was just Jasper that hadn't said his farewells yet. He made promises to see everyone again soon, and told Emmett and Edward that he'd write to them, too. When it was time for him to say goodbye to me, it seemed like he could hardly get the words out.

"So… this is it," he said. "Fate tearing us apart."

"Don't think of it that way," I said, gently touching his cheek with my fingertips and looking up at him with a smile on my face. "I'm sure Fate's heart is in the right place. She probably thinks she's doing something nice for us."

"Yeah, because taking away someone's best friend is really nice," he grumbled. I laughed.

"Try to be more optimistic, okay? Have some fun over there. Bring me back a souvenir."

"I thought that was Rose's job," he teased.

"You can help her out," I said. "Get me some cowgirl boots to match the skirt."

He laughed. "Will do."

We stood in silence for a moment, just letting the Forks breeze run between us. Soon, Claudia beeped the car's horn.

"Jasper!" she called. "Let's get a move on, sweetie!"

"One minute!" he called back before turning to look at me. "Alice… there's something I want to tell you."

"Yeah?"

"I love you," he said.

I smiled. "Love you too, Jazz."

He sighed, shook his head, and gave me one last hug. "Goodbye, Alice," he said somberly just before turning and walking toward the car.

I stood there, confused, wondering about his sudden change of mood. I shrugged it off and focused on watching the moving van and the small, family car pull out of the driveway. And as they drove past all the small houses, my eyes swelled with tears and my heart gave a squeeze.

_Goodbye, Alice._

Those two words would ring in my head until the next time I saw him, and God knew when that would happen…


	8. Chapter 8

**Alice's POV – Age Fourteen**

It was exactly one week after Jasper had moved. The word was starting to spread around school that he and the Hales had gone to Houston. Seeing my walking down the hallway alone and grim half the time didn't help much with stopping the simple story of his moving from turning into something about him having to move to an entirely different state just to tell me that he didn't like me like that. God, I hated middle school

The bad part was that, with Jasper gone, I had to defend myself against Maria and her sisters. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I was some sissy girl that needed her big brother to protect her, and I definitely was glad that I was going to be able to give Maria a piece of my mind without Jasper calming me just by putting a hand on my shoulder and snapping me out of it. It was just that it was always the Alice and Jasper show—and now it was just me, just Alice.

I looked up from the floor and saw Maria walking forward, hips swaying so unnaturally and so much that she almost pushed two seventh graders into the lockers with her fat ass. _Ha, ha. Maria's a fat ass._

Her sisters, as always, flanked her. When she saw me she automatically sneered and I prepared to stand my ground.

"Thanks for driving my boyfriend away, Alice," she said. "Who knew he'd have to move to Kansas for you to get the message. Unless, you still _don't _get the message, in which case I feel really bad for you."

"Newsflash, sweetie," I said in my usual sweet, perky voice. "Houston's in Texas, not Kansas."

She grimaced and turned to Lucy. "Look at that, little Alice is so much a nerd that she feels the need to correct _me _about something as insignificant as that."

I giggled. "That the best you can do, hun?" I asked. "Because if it is, then your best sucks."

I started walking past her, but something she said made me stop.

"Jasper was right," she said. "You _are _ugly and annoying."

I turned around. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me," she said. "Before he left, at Seth's pool party, we were talking. I asked how you two were doing, and he said you were ugly and annoying."

I grimaced and fought against the little voice inside me saying that she might be telling the truth. Maria didn't tell the truth… right?

"And he also said," Nettie started, "Oh, wait, no. Maria, you said it was too terrible for her to know, right?"

Maria's eyes saddened. It was too convincing. Sadness like that couldn't be faked unless you were a _really _good actress, which Maria wasn't. She hadn't even been good enough to play the only one-appearance, one-line role in the school play: girl with bucket.

"That's what I said, Nettie," Maria said. "I wouldn't wish those words to be heard by anyone, even someone like her."

"What?" I asked tentatively. Several possibilities swirled through my head, but I pushed them aside and waited for the actual answer.

"Oh, Alice, I don't think you want to know," Lucy said.

A passing girl, Jessica, actually, paused. "She's right, you know. I heard Jasper say it. Is the one you're talking about the one about the… P-I-G?" she asked Maria. As if I couldn't spell.

Maria nodded.

"Oh," Jess gasped. "That's bad. You don't want to hear it, Alice, unless you really want to ruin your friendship."

"Tell me," I said simply. "I won't get mad."

The four girls looked at each other before turning back to me. It was Maria who spoke.

"On top of saying that you were ugly and annoying, he said you had unrealistic fantasies and that your sketches were hideous. He said you should go live in the mud with a dozen pigs, since they were the only things that _might _accept you."

Jasper had read that somewhere—I remembered. He told me about it. Maria couldn't have possibly known that. And Jessica… Jessica didn't lie. I wouldn't exactly count her as one of my friends, but she was one of the girls I could go to for any true gossip. Tears sprung to my eyes.

"I—I have to go," I said, turning away before any tears could spill over. The bell rang, but I wasn't in the mood for class. I checked my watch. Eight o' clock. Texas time was Washington time minus one hour… good. I still had time to catch him before school, if I was lucky.

I ran down the hall, not bothering with the common courtesy of saying "excuse me" when trying to walk through people. There was a pay phone next to the girls' bathroom. They'd installed it after the shoot out that had happened last year—talk about scary—in case anyone needed to make a call during an emergency, or something like that. Kids used it for personal calls all the time, and it happened so often that even the principal didn't care anymore.

I dug in my pocket for four quarters—it was two for a call around here, four for long distance—and put them into the machine then dialed Jasper's new home number that I already had memorized. He answered on the first ring.

"Hello?" he said, yawning. "Who is this?"

"Jazz," I sighed, my voice cracking. That seemed to wake him up.

"Alice," he gasped. "Are you alright? Where are you? What happened?"

"I'm at school," I said, answering his simplest question. Even though I was unbelievably mad at him for saying those things about me, his voice was still music to my ears.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"No, Jasper, I'm not okay," I said, swallowing my tears. "I just wanted to let you know that I don't want anything to do with you anymore." I was pretty much sobbing into the phone by that point. "How could you say that about me? Why, Jazz? Do you really hate me that much?"

"Alice, I—"

"You know what? Forget it. I can't talk to you right now."

I dropped the phone, not even bothering to put it up properly. The halls were empty now, except for a frenzied Bella who I ran into.

"Alice," she said. "Where have you been? Mr. Delrio told me to come looking for you. Wait—what happened?"

"It's Jasper," I said, wiping my tears.

"Is he hurt?" she gasped. "Is Rose okay? And Aunty Claudia and Uncle Richard? _What happened?_"

I told her everything, and she kept her hands on my shoulders the entire time. I wanted to reach up and take them away—the gesture reminded me too much of _him_—but I didn't have the strength to. By the time I was done, she'd pulled me into a hug.

"Alice, are you insane?" she asked. "Listening to _Maria_, of all the damn people! What is up with you? Are you on some kind of medication Mom forgot to tell me about?" She pressed a hand to my head. "Sick, maybe?"

I swatted her hand away. "This isn't a joke, Bella!" I said. "Jasper… he didn't even like me! All the time, I saw him like the brother I never had! And he saw me like the annoying girl that tagged along everywhere."

"Alice, listen to me. That is so not true!" Bella said. "Jasper loved you—he still loves you! Do you really think he'd throw away all these years of friendship?"

I wiped away more tears. "No," I sniffled. "I guess not."

"Listen, you go on to class. There's something I have to do," she insisted.

"But, Bella—"

"What?" she snapped.

"I don't want to go to class," I said. "I have a major headache, I'm not thinking straight. I feel like I'm going to pass out."

The truth was, I was feeling extremely faint. My head was swirling and being jack-hammered by an invisible source. I was seeing stars—literally.

"Oh, crap," Bella muttered. "Crap, crap, crap. Um, okay, here." She put one arm around my shoulder and supported my weight, which was extremely easy, even for her.

"I'll take you to the nurse," she said. "Then I'll go call him."

"What?" I asked. "Bella, no. Besides, you probably already missed him."

She grimaced. "Whatever. You need to get your ass onto some kind of bed so you can lie down. Alice, you're literally green. Damn; that's a real shitty color on you." Whoa; I'd never heard Bella curse so much. Maybe I was hallucinating. As I'd said, I wasn't thinking straight.

She took me to the nurse's office, which was empty, and helped me lie down on the cot in the corner. She sat in a chair until a nurse came in.

"Goodness!" she exclaimed. "What happened?"

"Alice isn't feeling too well," Bella said, stating the obvious. From the way I tossed my head over the side of the cot and started dry heaving into the trashcan, it was pretty clear that I wasn't feeling well.

"Honey, do you want me to call your mother?" the nurse asked me.

"No thank you," I said, coughing and lying back down. "I'll be fine. Just need to rest."

The nurse pursed her lips, and nodded. I closed my eyes and soon I heard her leave the room.

I didn't know what to believe. Jasper had been my best friend my entire life, but didn't his saying that stuff sort of cancel that out? But what if Maria was lying, and manipulating Jessica into lying, too? That definitely wouldn't be a first.

It didn't take long for me to fall asleep, and it didn't feel like it took me long to wake up, either, even though it had been six hours since Bella had to come get me _after school_.

"Feeling better?" she asked, sitting on the cot. I propped myself up and shook my head.

"Not really," I said. "Headache hasn't gone away. I think it's gotten worse, actually."

"Want me to call Mom so she can come pick us up?" Bella asked, comfortingly rubbing my leg. "The school called her and she told me that if you weren't feeling okay, that she could come home and pick us up."

"No, no, I'm fine," I assured her with a smile, standing up and fighting against my inner nausea to try and maintain my usual poise.

"Alright," Bella said. "I got your backpack out of your locker, and I picked up your homework. Emmett and Edward said to feel better. They were going to come over after school, but I said that you might feel better quicker with a quiet house."

I smiled and took my backpack from her, straining against the jumble of feelings still brewing inside me. "Thanks, Bells. But you didn't have to do that! I love having those two over. Emmett's fun, and Edward makes you so happy! By the way, do you have any clue when you're going to start dating him? I know the perfect place for you two to go!"

Bella groaned and stuck her fingers in her ears as we walked out of the school. I spoke loud enough, though, that I knew she heard me. Doing so was a nice distraction from the scene this morning. I still didn't know what I was going to do about it, though.

We got home, wet from the falling rain. Bella announced she was going to take a shower before calling the guys and saying they could come. I nodded, and grabbed a towel from the bathroom before she got in there to dry off the worst of the water on my hair. Then, having nothing else to do, sat down at the computer and turned it on. By habit, I went to my email. Two messages. I clicked the first one—it was from Jessica.

I didn't really want to hear from her, but I read it anyway. It was short, so it was over quickly.

_Alice,_

_I lied, okay? I'm sorry. She made me. Said she'd make my life hell if I didn't._

_-Jess_

I didn't have to wonder for more than a second who the 'she' was. Maria. Oh, God, I blew up for no reason. Jasper probably hated me…

I clicked the next message, from Jasper. I clenched my eyes tightly, before opening them, and expecting the worst.

_Alice,_

_Bella called. She told me everything. Alice, you can't believe everything you hear. And from Maria! I don't blame you—she can be convincing, especially if she has someone outside her and her sisters backing her up. Alice, I hope you believe me, and not her. I love you, okay? I'm miserable without you. Nothing will change that. _

_-Jasper_

Tears sprung to my eyes, but they weren't from sadness at all. I through my head back and laughed, mostly at my stupidity. I didn't notice Bella behind me, hair wet from her quick shower, until she patted my back.

"You're welcome," she said, smiling.

I smiled at her and threw my arms around her neck, squealing with happiness.

"Thank you, Bella," I said, kissing both of her cheeks. "I owe you one."

"Welcome," she said, wiping her cheeks playfully. "I'm gonna go call the guys."

"I'll email Jasper back," I said with a nod. She went off to the kitchen, and I sat back down and pressed the 'reply' button.

_Jazz,_

_I'm sorry. I shouldn't have believed her. Love you, too, big bro._

_-Alice._

He replied almost immediately, which surprised me since he should've just gotten home from his new school.

_Alice,_

_Brother. Yeah. Right. Talk to you soon._

_-Jazz_

I wasn't sure what the first part was supposed to mean, but I decided that as long as he still loved me, and he forgave me for being an idiot, it was all good.

I turned off the computer and went to my room. I threw myself on my bed, face up, and stared at the ceiling.

I laughed again and kept laughing until the doorbell rang.

"Alice!" Bella called. "The guys are here!"

I skipped down the stairs, happy that such a terrible day was having a great close. The only thing that could make it better was Jasper coming back.

But since that might not happen very soon, I decided to live in the moment, and make the most of what was to come.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Okay, so, I'm scratching that last part about a hiatus, mostly because I found the guts to just write this on my mom's computer (don't ask why it would take guts in the first place—it's complicated)**

**Alice's POV – Age 15**

"Happy birthday!" I squealed, jumping onto Bella's bed. It was September thirteenth—and the first Saturday since we started high school on Monday. It was also our birthday. Mom and Dad wanted to be here with us, but Dad had a business trip and Mom didn't want to be left behind. They trusted us enough to let us have a birthday party with no supervision.

"Alice," Bella groaned, throwing a pillow that might've been aimed at me, but I wasn't sure since it hit the wall opposite me. "It's Saturday. Let me sleep."

"But it's not just any Saturday!" I argued. "It's our birthday! Not get that little butt of yours out of bed. We need to get everything ready, and then I have to make you beautiful!"

My sister groaned again and I scooted over to give her room to sit up. She pulled a rubber band out of her hair and shook it out, hitting me in the face several times on "accident."

"Alright, what's the game plan?" she asked, legs crossed, with her hands in her lap.

"Well, right now, we have to go get the backyard cleaned up," I said. "Huge storm last night; it totally tossed everything around. Edward and Emmett are going to be here in a bit to help us get things ready. Now, normally I wouldn't let Edward see you un-glamorized, but I'm making an exception. Mom left us some decorations under the sink and food in the fridge. She and Dad should be calling in a bit, so—"

"Whoa, Alice, slow down," Bella said, putting one hand on my shoulder. I giggled. Sometimes I forgot that no one could understand me when I was talking a million miles a minute. "Let's take it one step at a time. Okay, so, there was a storm?"

I nodded. "Yeah. All the chairs we had around the pool were blown around and the wind blew leaves all around the place, so we'll have to clean that."

"I get that," Bella said. "But if there was a storm last night, don't you think there may be one today? Maybe we should move the party inside."

I pulled her yellow lacey curtains apart. "See? Sunny. Perfect."

"Yeah, but, will that stay?" she asked.

I smiled. "I'm sure it will." Bella nodded. She knew that I was probably more reliable than the weather man who predicted ninety degrees in the middle of winter and didn't know he retired three years ago.

The doorbell rang and I squealed in excitement.

"Edward and Emmett are here!" I sang, jumping up from the bed and dancing out the door. "And Bella—at least put on a nice shirt, would you? Remember this is Edward who's coming!"

I could almost hear the blood rush to my sister's cheeks. I giggled to myself as I answered the door.

"Let me in on the joke?"

I gasped and threw my arms around the tall, beautiful, blonde-haired girl in the doorway.

"Rose!" I screamed putting all my strength into the hug. "Oh my God. Bella! Get your butt down here!"

"Alice, what's your problem?" Bella grumbled as she trudged down the stairs. "You tell me to go get dressed, then the next second—holy crap! Rosalie!"

Between Bella's repeated hugs, and mine Rosalie didn't get a chance to say a word. But she didn't have to. The atmosphere said enough.

"What are you doing here?" I asked animatedly. "I mean, not that I'm not totally thrilled to have you here and all, but haven't you been living in Texas?"

She smiled, revealing the pearl white teeth I remembered. "Mom let me come for your birthday. Said I can stay the week. She doesn't care if I miss school. I have a perfect four-point-oh." Pride seeped into her voice and I couldn't help but tease her a bit about her newfound accent.

"Someone's talking like a Texan," I joked.

She scoffed and her prissy miss voice that she'd had since we were little returned, covering up all traces of that teensy-weensy accent. "Ahem, yeah, not really."

I laughed, and so did Bella.

"So our mom gave you the okay to stay?" she asked. Rose nodded happily.

"Yeah! It'll be just like old times!" Rose said. "Now can I get to a phone? Mom said to call when I got here."

"Sure, no problem," I said. "I trust you remember where the phone is."

"Remind me." She smiled, and I knew she just wanted an excuse to stay with us. We hadn't seen each other in months—and that was millenniums in best friend years.

"Hate to say it, but I gotta go get dressed," Bella said reluctantly. "One of us didn't wake up at five in the morning to fix herself up." She excused herself and went back upstairs, leaving Rose and me to chat.

"Does anyone else know you're here?" I asked immediately.

She shook her head. "Nope. I wanted it to be a surprise."

I'd been fighting against asking the one question that had been trying to fight its way out of my mouth—it might sound rude. But I couldn't—I _wouldn't_—take it anymore.

"Is… Jasper with you?" I asked hopefully. Maybe his bags got lost and he had to stay at the airport longer. That'd work… right?

Rose sighed and shook her head. "Jasper's grades are terrible. Mom wouldn't let him come. She said there was no way he was missing a week of school with a two-point-eight."

I gasped. "He has a _two-point-eight_?!" So I wasn't a straight A student, but a two-point-eight? God. And for _Jasper. _The worse grade he'd ever gotten was an A-. "What happened?"

Rose shrugged. "Ever since we moved there, his grades slipped more and more. He's so distracted. I don't even know who he is anymore. Sometimes he just turns on his computer, goes to his email, and refreshes the page for hours. Other time he locks himself up in his room and just… does nothing. He hasn't touched his stereo in months, and I can't remember the last time I saw him pick up a book. It's like he's dead."

My heart twisted and I almost couldn't breathe. My poor Jazz! What was going on with him? "Girl trouble, maybe?" I suggested.

"Definitely," she said, but her tone implied there was more to what she said. I was too frazzled to really care.

"Oh, I should've called more," I said. "Maybe I could've helped him get through it. Did a girl break up with him?"

Rose picked up the phone she'd been ignoring throughout our entire conversation and started dialing. "Something like that. Oh, yeah, Mom? Yeah, I'm here."

I sighed. I felt guilty—incredibly guilty. I'd been neglecting my best friend. How could I? The doorbell rang again, and I knew it had to be Edward and Emmett this time. Rosalie motioned for me to go answer the door, an excited smile playing at her lips. She wanted to see Emmett—I knew it.

I flew to the door and threw it open. Edward and Emmett were there, both smiling with present bags in hand.

"Happy birthday, Alice!" they both said. I threw myself at them—giving them hugs and pecks on the cheek.

"You guys are so sweet," I said.

"Where's Bella?" Emmett asked. "She needs her birthday hug."

"Whoa." Edward's voice sounded hypnotized, and his face held that same thing. He stared through me—no, he was staring at something behind me. I turned around, and there was Bella, coming down the stairs, barefoot, in shorts so short they were obviously mine and a plain white tank top. Her thick hair framed her face and she smiled. I smirked. Yeah, Edward so thought she was hot.

"Hey, guys," Bella said, completely oblivious to the fact that Edward was looking at her like she was something to eat—in a good way, though. She gave them both a hug and took the bags.

"Did you tell them yet?" she whispered to me on her way to the kitchen to put the presents on the table. I shook my head.

"They'll figure it out," I said, winking. She smiled.

"Alice, is there someone in your kitchen?" Emmett asked. "I could swear I'm hearing voices. And don't you dare tell me I'm crazy again! This is not like that one time at Chuck E. Cheese; I swear it's not—"

I laughed. "Emmett, chill. Yeah, there's someone in the kitchen. Actually, I think she'd like to see you."

I motioned for them to follow me, and they both looked at each other with confused looks on their faces. They walked behind me, and I led them to the kitchen.

When Emmett laid eyes on Rose, he couldn't contain himself. He ran forward and swept her into his arms. They kissed, and I smiled. I knew he'd love seeing her. I took the phone from the counter, and left the room, dialing Jasper's cell phone number. It rang twice before he answered.

"Alice!" he exclaimed. "Happy birthday!" His accent was a bit more pronounced than Rose's, but it wasn't those "howdy, y'all!" accents that annoyed the crap out of me. I could still here the old Jazz in there. Actually, the southern accent suited him well.

I smiled. "Hey, Jazz. Thanks. I miss you. I was so sad when Rose said you couldn't come."

His voice lost some excitement. "She's there?"

"Yeah," I said tentatively. "You didn't know?"

"No," he answered, his voice breaking. Oh, how I longed to push his tousled blonde hair out of his face and tell him it was okay, that I knew he wanted to be here. "When I left the house, Mom told me that she was sick."

"Wait… where are you?"

"Out with some friends."

My smile widened. "You made friends? Oh, Jasper, you have to tell me all about them! What are they like? What are their names?"

"Okay, so they're not really friends," he admitted. "Just some guys from the baseball team. Garrett, Eleazar, Liam, and Carmen."

"Whoa, whoa, _Carmen_? That doesn't sound like a guy's name." I smirked.

"Alice, please—"

"No, you please! Tell me all about her! Do you like her? What does she look like? Is she nice to you?"

"She's… nice. From Spain. Tall, black hair, pale, green eyes. But I don't like her like that. She has a boyfriend—Eleazar." I pursed my lips.

"Darn," I muttered. "Jazz, we need to find you a girl. Come one. If you still look anything like that handsome Jasper you were when you left Forks, then you should be able to get any girl you want." I didn't feel awkward saying that. I complimented Jazz the way someone would compliment… I don't know—Orlando Bloom. But it didn't make anything uncomfortable. We were friends, and we told each other the truth. Jasper was a total cutie. I was surprised he didn't have a girlfriend.

"Not any girl," he sighed, obviously not intending me to hear.

"What?" I asked. "You like a girl! Oh, Jazz, I absolutely knew it! Tell me, tell me, oh, Jasper, please tell me all about her!"

"Alice," he groaned. "Please? Not now?"

"Jasper!" I whined. "You can't just leave me hanging like that!"

He sighed, but didn't say anything.

"Fine. Don't tell me about her. Tell me one thing though."

He was silent for a while—debating. Eventually, he sighed again. "Depends."

I smiled. "How much do you like her?"

Again, Jasper was silent. I wasn't sure what the big deal was. I wasn't asking him—anymore—who she was. Just… how much he liked her. What was the big deal?

"I think I love her," he said slowly.

It was my turn to not say anything. I was speechless. Jasper _loved _this girl? Goodness. She had to be special. I hoped she was good. I wouldn't be able to bear seeing Jasper with a girl who wasn't right for him.

"Jasper, you love her?" I asked. "You haven't even been in Texas that long! Does she know?"

"No," he said, obviously angry with himself because he told me in the first place.

"You love her… and she doesn't even know you're _interested_?"

"Not as far as I know," he sighed, sadly, more to himself than to me. "She's clueless. Every time I talk to her—"

"Alice," Bella's voice interjected. I realized she'd picked up the other phone. "We need you."

"Bells, come on, two minutes," I pleaded.

"Alice, please." It was Rose's voice this time. Wow, I was surprised Bella had dragged her away from Emmett. "We can't find the decorations, and your mom just called Bella's cell asking why you're not picking up the house phone."

I sighed. "Alright, be right there." I stayed silent until I was sure they'd hung up. I returned my attention to Jasper.

"I'll call you back, okay?" I said.

"Alright," he muttered. "I miss you."

I sighed. "Aw, I miss you too, big bro. Promise you'll call back later, okay? Give your friends and your parents my love. And swear to me one thing."

"Anything."

"Swear to me that this girl is someone you'll always love, and not just another crush."

I could hear the sad smile in his voice. "I swear, Alice. Actually, I think you'd be rather fond of her."

I smiled. "Alright, I believe you. Love you, Jazz. Don't forget to call."

"I won't," he vowed. "Bye, Alice."

I hung up the phone before he could hear me sniffle. I always started crying right before we hung up, and continued for a few minutes after. I missed him so much.

We ended up finding the minimal decorations—right where I knew they'd be—and doing up the backyard in less than twenty minutes. We still had six hours till the party—night parties were more fun than day ones—so we sat on the couch with cheese puffs and sodas, watching old movies and laughing like the friends we were. Edward had his arm around Bella the entire time, and Emmett and Rose didn't stop sucking face for more than five minutes.

Leaving me sandwiched in between the four of them.

But I didn't mind. I thought it was cute. Bella and Edward, their innocent flirting… come on. How was that _not _adorable? And Emmett and Rose, well, sure, the slurping noises were gross, but they were in love.

In love.

Those words reminded me of Jasper. He was in love with a girl I didn't even know. I hoped he was right—I hoped I'd like her. How terrible would it be if my future husband and I visited Jasper and this girl for the holidays later in life and I couldn't stand her? Or what if she cheated on him? Would he believe me if I told him, or would that end our friendship because he'd pick her over me?

God, I hated when I did that. We were fifteen, and I was thinking so far forward. Again. My mind always focused on the future. Sometimes it was fun, but when it was over and I snapped back to my senses, jeez, I felt like I was experiencing some kind of drastic hangover.

An hour before the party, Bella, Rose, and I excused ourselves to go get ready and left Edward and Emmett alone with the football game on TV. I wasn't even sure they noticed us leave.

Rose took her bags up to my room and dug through her suitcase until she found a cute, strapless black dress with a strip of pink lining the top. She was the first one ready—her outfit complete with a chic pair of sandals and a pair of completely to die for earrings.

Bella, of course, refused a dress, so I put her in a simple black tube top—which she almost murdered me for, but oh well—and a black and turquoise tulle skirt. Oh, and heels. They weren't even that tall, but Bella was such a whiner. "Alice, I'm such a klutz" and "Alice, I can't walk in these" and "Alice, the first step I take down those stairs in these shoes is going to be the death of me." Whatever.

As for me, I pulled on a dark blue halter dress with a detailed waistline that looked absolutely darling on me. The three of us made it back downstairs just in time. Twilight leaked in through the open windows, and so did the voices of a bunch of eager party guests waiting outside. I smiled.

"Let the party begin."

**A/N: Just wanna let you guys know that the outfits in this chapter have been uploaded to my website ^^  
Reviews are love!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Alice's POV – Age 15**

It was midway through the night, and so far, things were going amazingly. Practically our entire school had shown up, which made me thankful that we had a large backyard.

Mostly everyone was glad to see Rosalie again—everyone except Maria, who snuck in along with her sisters. I wasn't going to kick her out, and neither was Bella. We were trying to be the bigger people here, and as long as she didn't give us any grief, she was… well, not welcome, but we wouldn't have Emmett haul her out as long as she kept her distance.

"Happy birthday, Alice," said the voice of someone who was unmistakably Jessica. She squeezed through the crowd and popped up in front of me. I pursed my lips.

"Thanks, Jess," I muttered. Her face reddened. Obviously she knew I hadn't exactly forgotten the mess she'd gotten me into when she'd decided to aid Maria in convincing me that Jasper hated me.

There was an awkward silence, during which Jessica just kind of stared at me, as if trying to guess what I was thinking. I stood there airily, waving to several quests that'd just arrived and smiling at others who made eye contact with me.

"I'm sorry," she blurted out. "I'm sorry, okay! Alice, please don't look at me like that."

I furrowed my eyebrows. I hadn't realized I'd been looking at her in any odd way. "Look at you like what?"

"Like I'm some revolting piece of crap!" Jessica cried. Several people turned to look, but I waved them away with a reassuring glance. "Even though I totally deserve it," she added as an afterthought. "I hope Jasper doesn't hate me for it."

"He doesn't," I said automatically, even though I really didn't know Jasper's feelings on the whole situation.

"I—I brought you something to make up for it," she said.

"Jess, you didn't have to do that," I said. "I forgive you, I truly do."

As if she hadn't heard me, she grabbed my wrist and unclenched my fist. In my hand she placed a note. It was crumpled and yellowed, but when I opened it, I found I could read it.

"Maria said she took it from Jasper at Seth's party," said Jessica. "She left it in her science book one day, and I took it. I figured it would be for you. Sorry if it's not."

And with those words, she swept herself away, leaving me alone again, with my eyes skimming the words on the paper.

_Why am I writing this? Even I don't know. I won't send it, and I'll do anything to make sure you don't see it, but I guess I just have to get it out of my system. Well, here it goes._

_I love you. I've always loved you. Since the first time I laid eyes on you, I loved you. You're beautiful. I've lied to you for so long—I've lied to myself for so long. 'You don't love her like that, Jasper.' Yeah, right._

_We're young, yeah, I know, but, as someone once told me, love doesn't discriminate against age. _

"Aw, I told him that," I said to myself, smiling.

_So… yeah. That's it. Maybe one day I really will declare my love to you. Or maybe not._

"With love, from Jasper," I finished reading. My smile was wide.

Oh, Jasper was in love with someone! And obviously she was here in Forks, or else he wouldn't have had the note here! Who was she? I couldn't help but feel a bit hurt that he didn't tell me, but that didn't matter. I ran into the house, squealing as if Christmas had come early. I turned on the light to the kitchen, where I wasn't surprised to find Emmett and Rose all over each other.

"Out!" I giggled, too giddy to even pretend to be upset. Rose hopped off the counter.

"Who got you drunk?" she joked as she took Emmett by the hand. No doubt they'd continue what they started in a different room. I didn't care. I picked up the phone and dialed Jasper's number with shaking fingers.

"Hello?" I said the second I heard him pick up, not even giving him time to formulate a proper greeting.

"Alice?" he said, sounding rather tired. I looked at the clock; it was about two in the morning his time. Oopsie.

I didn't waste time. I read the note to him, trying to keep the smile out of my voice.

"Where did you find that?" he asked when I was done.

"So it's yours?" I said hopefully.

"Yes, it's mine," he muttered. "Where'd you find it?"

I told him about what Jessica said; about how Maria had taken it from him before he'd moved. He sounded absolutely dumbstruck.

"That demon," he muttered. "I'm going to kill her!"

I ignored him. "So who is she?"

"Who is who?" I couldn't help but notice he sounded extremely anxious.

"The girl, of course!" I said. "Do I know her?"

"Alice, this really isn't the time…"

"Is she pretty? Oh, it doesn't matter, does it? Is she nice to you?"

"Alice, I—"

"Does she like you back? Oh, of course she does! Who wouldn't like you?"

"ALICE!"

I stopped dead. I could hear him grinding his teeth together.

"This isn't the time," he said. "I'd rather not talk about it."

"But you'll tell me eventually, won't you?"

Jasper sighed. "One day. Maybe."

And with those three words, he hung up.

I sat, shocked, with the phone still at my ear. Jasper had never done that before. I mean, sure, we'd had our little tiffs, but he'd never _really _gotten angry with me. Maybe I was too forward…

"Alice," said Bella, rushing into the kitchen.

"Sup, Bells," I said, finally putting down the phone.

"Some older guys came," she said.

"Are they causing any trouble?" I asked.

She shook her head. "No," she said. "But one of them wants to meet you."

I giggled. "How old?"

Bella smiled. "Not much older than we are. Emmett's age."

"He cute?"

"Definitely."  
"Lead me to him, then."

Bella laughed, and I joined in. It wasn't like I was a whore or anything, but I enjoyed some harmless flirting. He was sixteen—big deal. One year older than me. Big deal.

Bells led me outside and pointed him out for me. He looked like a really sweet guy, and he pretty handsome. Black hair, blue eyes, lightly suntanned skin—not exactly extraordinary, but he looked nice. I walked over to him. He was at least half a foot taller than me—curse my shortness—but overall average height for his age.

"Hey," I said, hopping up and sitting on the table he was next to.

"You must be Alice," he noted.

"Indeed I am."

"I was talking to you sister—what's her name—"

"Bella," I said for him.

"Yeah, Bella," he said. "And she told me about you. I wanted to meet you."

"That's nice," I said.

"So happy birthday," he continued, pouring orange soda into two cups. He passed one to me. "A toast to you."

I laughed as we clinked our plastic cups together. He watched intently as I took a sip of the drink. It tasted a bit off, but what could I expect? It had been out here all day. The sun probably warmed it up…

I took another large gulp of it. "So, you know my name," I said. "What's yours?"

"Fred," he said, shaking my hand and taking a sip of his drink. "Fred Albus."

"Fred," I said again. "Nice name."

He smiled. "Thanks. I was named after my granddad. Never liked it much."

"Well, I think it suits you," I said, taking another sip of the drink in my hands.

And the night went on. Hours ticked by, and the party was still alive. I didn't leave Fred's side for more than a moment.

I kept feeling thirstier and thirstier, so I kept going back for more soda to drink. Fred was such a gentleman—he poured me each of them. At around midnight, I was feeling pretty dizzy, but I assumed it was because of all the dancing I'd been doing.

"Can you show me your room?" Fred asked during a break in our ongoing conversation. "I'd love to see it."

I hiccupped. "Sure," I said, taking him by the hand and running to the house. I felt unusually giddy and carefree. I _was _older now. Maybe it was part of the experience.

I knew I wasn't supposed to have guys who I hadn't known since I was three—Jasper, Emmett, Edward—in my room, but I felt reckless. I wanted to break rules. I wanted to laugh and spend the rest of the night on top of the world, but for now, my room was okay.

I sat on my bed, and Fred sat next to me. Before I could speak, he'd pinned me to the bed, and his lips were on mine. My head spun from the sudden movement, and when I opened my eyes, everything was spinning. I weakly tried hitting him, and telling him to get off, but all my strength had left me.

"Off," I muttered.

"You don't want that," he said, his hands trailing down my stomach. I slapped him with as much force as I could smother.

"Oh yes I do," I said, trying to push him off. Ugh—why was he so big? Well, big compared to me, anyway.

"Dammit, no, stop…"

But he didn't stop. He was taking advantage of me. But how—? How was I letting him? I hadn't totally lost my mind, I was sure.

I took a deep breath in one of the moments when he'd taken his horrible lips off me…

And screamed.

It wasn't long before Bella, Rosalie, Emmett, and Edward burst through the door of my room.

"Get your hands off of her!" Emmett yelled, lunging for him. Though they were the same age, Emmett was a lot bigger. He had Fred in a headlock in no time, and then it all happened really fast.

I was shaking, afraid, and Bella had her arm around me, leading me down the stairs.

"Edward, please, tell everyone to go home, and get Alice some water," she said, rubbing my arms with her hands and whispering "It'll be okay" in my ear.

"But…," Edward sighed. "Alright. Fine."

Bella sat me in a chair next to our heater and got me a blanket. I knew it wasn't cold, but I was shivering. Edward returned minutes later with water and saltine crackers. He put them next to me.

"Her breath smelled like alcohol," he explained to Bella, who gave him an odd look. "When Mom has a bit too much to drink, she eats some of these. It makes the hangover a bit more bearable."

"Alice, you were drinking?" Bella asked, shocked, as I nibbled on one of the crackers.

"Just soda," I said.

"Breathe on me," she said. I blew air in her face.

"Holy crap, Alice!" she said, waving away the smell. "Whatever you were drinking was _so _not soda."

I was too dazed to argue with her. I felt like I was permanently cross eyed, but the weird view of the room probably just came because of my killer headache.

"Bella," Jessica's voice said, and I heard her coming into the room. My head fell on Bella's lap, and she stoked my hair absentmindedly.

"Jess, I told you, party's over," Edward said coldly, pushing the water into my hands.

"I know," she said. "But I saw Fred give this to her. It's orange soda, but I think he spiked it."

Bella smelled the contents of the drink and wrinkled her nose.

"Thanks, Jessica," she said. Jess nodded and walked off. I saw her dump the drink into the bushes outside.

It was quiet, except for the noise from upstairs. I vaguely heard Rosalie scream "YOU ASSHOLE!" followed by what sounded like a smack. I smiled weakly and gagged.

"Uh-oh," Bella muttered. "Edward, you can go home… just bring the trashcan first, okay?"

Edward nodded and ran for the trashcan from the bathroom and put it right next to me just in time for me to throw up. Bella pulled my hair up from my face—not that I had much of it, but still.

"Yikes," she said. "I didn't think I'd have to be doing this till our twenty-first birthday."

Edward laughed and I coughed.

"You sure you don't need my help?" he asked, backing away from me a bit.

"No, I think Emmett and Rose have it covered," she said, smiling. "We're good. You can tell Esme Emmett will be home soon."

"Okay," he said, giving her a hug. He patted my head. "Feel better, Pixie. Happy birthday, to both of you."

I managed a low "Thanks" before I threw up again. After that, it wasn't long before Fred came tumbling down the stairs, with Emmett gripping his arm.

"Apologize," Rosalie said through gritted teeth.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. I noticed his nose was bleeding. Ha, thanks, Emmett…

"And how'd you hurt your nose?" Rose asked sweetly, her arms crossed. I knew she was enjoying herself.

"I fell," Fred muttered.

"Good," Rosalie said. "Alright, Emmett, let him go."

The second Emmett loosened his grip, Fred ran, and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Thanks, you two," I said, wiping off my mouth.

"Well, I'm gonna go," Emmett said, giving Rose a peck on the cheek. "Happy birthday, guys."

He waved and left. I stood, holding onto Bella's shoulder for support.

"Cleaning can wait till tomorrow, right?" Rose said, helping me. "Let's get you to bed."

"Yeah," Bella said. "A couple of ice cubes on your eyes in the morning, and you'll look perfectly fine."

We were going up the stairs now. I smiled gratefully. I couldn't have asked for a better pair of friends.

"Oh, and can I ask you guys a small favor?" Rose said.

Bella and I nodded.

"_Please_ let me move my sleeping bag to Bella's room. No offense, Alice, but I'm not going to like be woken up by puke."

**A/N: Sorry I took foreverrrrrr. School was crazy, and I'm finally out for the summer! w00t w00t. Aha.**

**And yes, Fred is an ass who will never be mentioned again… or will he? Dun, dun, dun! Lmfao xD**

**Reviews are love!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N;; So sorry bout not updating peoples. I know I said I'd update as soon as I got back from vacation, but I guess I kinda lied. Heh. I have about a month till school starts again and I'm over my head with shit—fanfiction being a part of that (but don't worry, fanfic is good shit :D) **

**So, anyway, I beg you guys not to stop reading or reviewing, and not to get impatient with me. I promise I'll try to turn these things out quicker now. Hopefully I can update a story ever other day or so? ;D**

**Alice's POV – Age 15**

I'd passed out the night before halfway through carrying Rose's sleeping bag to Bella's room. All I could really remember was slacking and hitting the floor. After that, I remembered someone pressing ice to my eyes and feeling the floor change to my bed.

And now, as I opened my eyes, I was blinded, even by the very dim lighting of my room. I stumbled over to the window and closed the blinds. I swayed on my feet—something I never did; that was Bella—and landed on the floor, flat on my butt. I bashed my head against the wall lightly.

But, thankfully, Bella and Rose had been right. The saltine crackers and water had definitely helped wear off the worst of it. I'd expected to feel much woozier to the point of where I'd need to throw up, but it was just a slight dizziness that would easily be cured by breakfast… or so I hoped.

"Look whose up."

I looked up from hitting my head and saw Rose, standing in the doorway, smirking.

"What's got you so happy?" I mumbled.

"Oh nothing," she said indifferently.

"You're such a horrible liar."

"You really want to know?" she asked. Considering her tone, she wasn't going to wait for me to respond. "Fred ratted us out. Told his mom what Emmett and I did."

"And you're happy about this _why_?" I asked, caught off guard. I hadn't expected that, and that was bizarre, because I was one to always expect _everything_.

"Because when she called the house to yell about it, Bella told her why we did that." Rose's smirk became more pronounced, and after a second of silence, it turned into a full-on grin.

"Apparently, this wasn't the first time he did something like this," Rosalie continued. "His mom is making him take this class thing at a juvenile detention center now, because of what he did to you."

I couldn't help but feel a grim satisfaction building inside me that he got what he deserved. Rose helped me up and kept one hand on my shoulder as we went downstairs, as if waiting for me to fall over the side of the railing and puke again. I shook my head and smiled silently at her over protectiveness.

"Bella's got breakfast cooking," she informed me as I inhaled the scent of eggs and bacon, maybe even French toast? Yum. I'd expected the smell of food to repulse me, but a lot of my expectations turned out to be wrong. This was my first hangover, after all, no matter how subtly it was hitting me.

"Order up," Bella sang, sliding three plates of food onto the kitchen table. I took a seat in front of the plate with the less food piled onto it. Don't get me wrong—Bella was an excellent cook, far better than me, but I didn't want to overdo it this morning. The last thing I needed was to be throwing up when Mom and Dad called to see how the party had gone.

I picked up my fork and took a small bit off food into my mouth. I chewed it and swallowed, waiting to see how my stomach would react to the new substance. When it seemed like I'd be fine, I started eating again, my eyes wandering around the room.

"So did Jasper call yesterday?" Rose asked, covering her mouth as she chewed.

"I called him," I said, wiping the corners of my mouth with my napkin. "I wanted to ask him about this note Maria took from him."

"Ooh, what was the note about?" Bella asked, standing and taking her plate to the sink. "Done?" she questioned, looking at my plate. I nodded and felt around in the pocket of my jeans—that I just realized I'd slept in the night before—and pulled out the note. I smoothed it out on the table and read from it.

When I was done, I folded the paper back up and put it back in my pocket. Rose and Bella were staring at me with wide eyes. I was giggling like a schoolgirl and smiling so much it made my face hurt.

"Erm… Alice? Can I talk to you?" Rose asked.

I leaned forward. "Sure, Rose. I'm all ears."

She looked over at Bella. "Alone, please?"

"Rose, I know where you're going with this," Bella said, dropping the plates in the sink and wiping her hands on her jeans. "If you're thinking what I think you're thinking—and I'm pretty sure I think I know what you're thinking—then I think I should stay."

"I think you know what I'm thinking about," Rose said, motioning for Bella to sit down. I giggled internally at the many variations of the word 'think' that had been used, then returned to being confused.

"What's this about?" I asked. My hand instinctively reached out to grab Bella's shoulder as she tripped over the leg of her chair, but my eyes never left Rose's.

"Alice, what were your first thoughts when you read that?" Rosalie started.

"I was ecstatic," I answered automatically. "I couldn't have been happier."

"You couldn't have been happier…," Bella sighed. "Alice, dig deeper inside yourself. Look beyond your happiness." She said the last word in a sarcastic voice. I couldn't imagine why.

I looked at her funny and tried to dig beyond my original feelings. I found that, hidden within my excite, there was a small pang of something. It made me feel sick, like I wanted to throw up. If I focused on it, it was like a hangover six times over.

"There's a little twinge," I said. "Why do you ask?"

Rose and Bella looked at each other. Rosalie sighed; Bella shook her head.

"Alice, do you really have no clue who the girl is that Jasper wrote about?" Bella asked tentatively.

"I haven't really thought about it," I answered. "But, no, actually, I don't. Why? Do _you _guys know?"

Rosalie pinched the bridge of her nose and took a few deep breaths. She looked up at me, her blue eyes piercing mine.

"It's you, Alice," she told me. "You're the girl of Jasper's dreams. He's in love with you."

I stared for a second; first at Rose, then at Bella. They both looked utterly, scarily serious. I couldn't help but laugh. In fact, I laughed so hard, I was clutching at my sides and gasping for breath. Bella and Rosalie exchanged an exasperated glance.

But that only made me laugh harder.

I kept laughing, and laughing, and laughing at the looks on their faces until Bella slapped me across the face. She sat down and twiddled her thumbs, keeping her eyes on her hands and her hair shielding her face as if she was ashamed that she'd just hit me.

I stopped laughing and straightened up in my chair, rubbing the side of my face.

"Thanks," I muttered. "I needed that."

Bella smiled at me sheepishly and gave me a thumbs up. I giggled.

"Anyway," I said, "that's the craziest thing I've ever heard. Jasper isn't in _love _with me."

"Yes he is," the two of them sang together.

"And you're in love with him," Rose added matter-of-factly.

"Okay, now I think you need a slap. Bella, will you do the honors, or should I?" I smirked.

"No, Alice, I'm with Rose on this one," she said. "He loves you. You love him. You guys _are in love with each other_."

"You're both crazy," I said, moving to stand up. Rose beat me to it. She came around and sat me back down in my chair. She and Bella scooted her chairs closer to me, sandwiching me in so that I couldn't leave. I pouted and crossed my arms like a four year old.

"Alice, don't you wonder why he's so protective of you?" Rose asked.

"He's my best friend," I said. "Of course he's protective of me."

"Didn't you ever wonder why he was always so affectionate with you?" Bella asked.

"Or why you were so affectionate with him?" Rose added.

"We have an affectionate friendship," I answered. "Duh."

Rose grabbed my wrist lightly and held up it up so that the sparkling pearl bracelet that dangled from it shone brightly in the sunlight coming in through the windows.

"He gave this to you in second grade," Bella reminded me. "I never remember you taking it off. Why is that?"

I snatched my wrist back and absentmindedly brushed a few of the pearls with the tip of my finger. "It was a gift from him," I told her. "Remember? It's special to me."

"_Why _is it special to you, Alice?" Rose demanded.

"Because he's my best friend, so anything he gives me is precious by default," I said, my palms starting to sweat.

"You're lying," Bella said.

"No I'm not!" I squeaked. Tears stung my eyes.

"You are, Alice," Rosalie said. "Now _why_ is it so special to you?"

"Be—because," I stuttered. "Because… because I don't know!"

"You _do_ know," Bella stated, her voice shaking. All our voices were shaking. I knew what they wanted to hear, but they weren't going to get it out of me. Not as long as my free will was still intact.

"Say it, Alice," Rose insisted.

"I—I can't!"

"Say it," Bella pressed.

"N—n—no! No!"

"Say it!" they both yelled.

"Because I'm in love with him!"

**A/N;; I really, desperately need your views on this, guys, like no joke XD Reviews are epic love, especially for this chappie.  
**

**PS: Say happy birthday to me; I'm blowing out twelve candles today :D**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: I can't wait to see if you guys will get as pissed at Alice in this chapter as I did… or more. I shouldn't be complaining, though. I am the one who writes this xD **

**Alice's POV – Age Fifteen**

Now that the words were out, I couldn't help but regret giving in. Did I honestly believe I was in love with Jasper? Hell no. That was like being in love with my brother. Did I honestly believe he was in love with me? _Double _hell no.

"Oh. My. God!"

And, of course, I was swung into a squealing session even I couldn't top. Ah, well. May as well give them their five minutes of happiness before I snatched it away from them.

"So are you gonna tell him?"

"Or do you want us to tell him?"

"Wait, Bella, she doesn't believe he loves her back, remember?"

"Well, we'll just have to make her believe then."

"I know, but that can wait till later."

"You're so right, Rose, first thing's first."

"And what would that be?"

"I think you have a clue."

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Sadly, I must be. This is what growing up with Alice for a sister does to you."

"We have to start planning your wedding!"

Okay. Five minutes—or five seconds… I never did keep track of time well—was over. Time to break it to them.

"Both of you," I said. "Take a chill pill."

They stopped their jabbering and looked at me confusedly.

"Come on, Alice, you've been planning your wedding since you were three," Bella started. "I can't believe you'd pass up an opportunity to discuss it in det—"

"Bells, Rose, listen to me for a second, please," I begged. "Listen. I cracked under pressure. You guys were drilling me, and it was getting really uncomfortable. I do _not _love Jasper as anything more than a brother, and a best friend."

"But you just said—"

"I know what I said," I clarified. "You try keeping cool under that amount of pressure."

Rose was turning red from anger and frustration. She was sputtering out words like a hot kettle sputters out water. I could barely understand anything until she started yelling.

"Good God, Alice!" she screamed. "You don't just declare your love for someone _under pressure_! You—you—you little—UGH!"

She stomped loudly out of the room. Bella glared at me.

"Look what you've done," she muttered before turning on her heels and running after Rosalie.

I sat, spent, on one of the chairs, banging my head repeatedly on the tabletop. I didn't see why they were getting so mad about this. So what if I didn't like Jasper? Rose and I agreed that Edward and Bella were perfect, but we never fumed about it like this. Hm. But, then again, Edward admitted he liked Bella to Rose and Bella admitted she liked Edward to me, so that was different, kind of…

My love life wasn't any of their business to begin with, so I didn't get why they were so hung up on it.

My heart was pounding at a million miles an hour. I was angry at my sister, and at my friend. Rose and Bella were just… ugh! I couldn't even describe it.

I needed someone now. I didn't want to be alone. The anger I felt from them rivaled my own, and it was scary. I took the phone from the counter and dialed Jasper's number, knowing he'd be there to comfort me.

But the phone rang, and rang, and rang some more. There was no answer until…

"Hello?"

There was a smile in his voice, as if he were bursting with cheer. I smiled, knowing he was happy.

"Hello," I said back, tears filling in my eyes for an unknown reason. I groaned internally and wiped at my eyes. I hated how I almost always cried immediately when I suddenly became happy.

I was expecting him to answer, but in stead, I heard the voice of a girl: Me.

"Ha, ha, just kidding," my voice giggled. "How many people do ya think we fooled, Jazz?"

"Probably a few," his voice answered mine. "Sorry. Not available right now. Alice is taking me shopping. Call for help; I only have a few hours left!"

"Oh, be quiet!" I laughed in the background. I heard a beep, and I turned off the phone so I didn't have to leave a message.

I couldn't believe he still had the voicemail that we'd set up a month before he left for Texas. I remembered the day so perfectly. Like it was yesterday…

_I knocked the phone out of his hand where it snapped shut on the floor. I tackled him onto my bed, screaming happily as we both went down. Jasper had one of his amazing smiles on his face—the kind I'd only get to see if it was just the two of us. _

_I faked an evil laugh. "You'll never escape my evil clutches! I'll drag to you every single store there is, and you'll have to help me decide what to spend my money on!"_

_He feigned horror, and I was sure I was finally going to convince him to go with me. But he was too strong, and pinned me under him. I brushed hair out of my face with my free hand, throwing my head back and laughing. I punched his chest playfully._

"_Let me go, crazy!" I laughed. "You're way too strong for me!"_

"_Never," he said, imitating my previous "evil" voice. "You'll be trapped forever!"_

_I was having a laughing fit now, which made him laugh. He rolled over so that he was lying down next to me instead of holding me down. I laughed and turned so that I was resting my head on his chest. I gasped for the breath I lost during my laugh attack._

"_You need to relax," he told me, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. "Breathe."_

"_I do breathe," I said, "in case you haven't noticed. Anyway, I was thinking: In about a week, that new store at the mall should be opening, and I really want to go to the sale that they're bound to have. I don't want to go alone, and you know Bella won't want to, then Rose has that after-school thing—"_

"_This is what I mean," he said, hushing me. "You're always living in the future, Alice. What's so wrong with enjoying and relishing in what you have now; what's going on now?"_

"_I do enjoy the here and now," I objected. "I'm enjoying myself right here, right now, aren't I?"_

_He sighed. "Yes, of course you are," he said, obviously not bothering to argue his point further. I didn't push the subject._

_"I just wish you'd learn to see things that were right in front of you."_

_I knew it was his voice, but it was such a low whisper, that I wasn't sure if I'd truly heard it or not. It sounded like something the wind would carry. If he had said it, he mustn't have meant for me to hear._

_Therefore, I didn't answer._

From then on, I was lost in a whirlwind of memories. I just propped my shoulder up onto the table and let myself drown in them, completely oblivious to the voices of Rose and Bella in the next room.

_We were at the public pool that was three blocks away from my house. We were thirteen, and it was a perfect summer day. Just hot enough to be able to spend the day in the water with your best friends._

_Rose and Emmett were in one corner of the pool, doing some harmless flirting. Edward was trying to persuade Bella to get over her shyness and get in the water with the bathing suit I'd bought her. I smirked, knowing that Edward would probably have a mild stroke when he saw her in it._

_Then, of course, there was Jasper and me. We were sharing a seat on one of the beach chairs that was set up around the pool. _

_"Can you believe we'll be going to high school in a few weeks?" I said, crossing my legs. "It seems like just yesterday you were rescuing me from a dark toy box."_

_He grinned. "I remember something like that happening yesterday," he teased. "Except it was a closet, and it was more like me rescuing you from yourself than from the actual closet."_

_I laughed and shook my hair out before resting my head on his shoulder. We'd been in the water most all the day, and now it was sunset. His scent—honey and peppermint; the smell that had comforted me since I was little—mixed with the water his hair dripped into the crease next to my eyes, creating something like perfumed tears._

_His arm wrapped around my shoulders, squeezing me to him. We said not a word, but there was a silent communication between the two of us. He was afraid of what high school might bring for us, but was willing to face it with me._

_My feelings exactly._

_I kept my eyes intent on the sun set for most of the time, but I would occasionally look up at him, and see him looking down at me with adoration in his eyes. I locked my gaze with his; silently willing him to know that he was the best fake big brother any girl could ever ask for. I knew he understood me when his eyes changed, but they didn't change to what I'd expected. They saddened a bit, and I couldn't imagine why…_

xXx

_I was in the fifth grade. Jasper and Rosalie were staying over at our house while their parents were on a business trip. Rose was sleeping in Bella's room. Jazz, sadly, had to sleep on the couch._

_I woke up with a horrible fright, tears streaming down my cheeks. Jasper had been dead. I'd found him, his torso bloody and mangled, on my own couch. His blue eyes had been open, silently asking why I hadn't gotten to him sooner._

_I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep again; especially not without knowing if my dream had been real. My dreams were almost always real. The lump in my throat grew larger and larger as I snuck down the stairs in the dark of the night._

_Jasper was sleeping on the pull-out bed from the couch, but he was absolutely still. My heart skipped a beat, and then another, and then another…_

_I scurried to his side and started shaking him._

_"Jazz," I sobbed quietly. "Jazz, please wake up."_

_He stirred slightly and I dropped to my knees in relief. My face was down on the covers, and I was shaking._

_"Alice," he said, alarmed, sitting upright and trying to tilt my chin up. "What's wrong? Are you alright?"_

_"The dream," I whispered. "It was so—so real. I thought—" _

_I could say no more, but just whimpered quietly._

_"Alice, don't be on the floor," he said. "Here, at least sit on the bed till you're okay."_

_I nodded and meekly climbed onto the pull-out bed. Instead of sitting, I threw myself face down next to him, resting my forehead on his arm._

_I put one arm around him, for the sole purpose of needing to know he was there and curled into his side. He rubbed my back comfortingly with his hand._

_"Alice, don't worry," he whispered. "I'm here; I'm okay. You're here; you're okay. Bella, Rose, and your parents are upstairs, and they're okay. Don't cry, please. Smile for me."_

_I looked up at him and tried my best to smile through my tears. _

_"There's my Alice." He grinned._

_"I was so scared," I said softly. "I thought… It was so real. The realest dream I've ever had."_

_"But it wasn't real, now was it?" he mused. "You can't always trust your dreams, Alice. Trust me." _Trust me. _He'd said the words with such sadness in his voice that made me wrap my arms around his neck._

_"But sometimes the only things I can trust are my dreams," I said._

_"No," he said. "You can trust me, can't you?"_

_I smiled. "Of course."_

_"Now why don't you try to go to sleep?" he suggested. "You need it."_

_"But—"_

_"No buts," he said, feigning sternness. "Now you march right up to bed and get some shut eye, you hear?"_

_"I don't want to go back up there," I said. "I can't."_

_He said nothing, but instead started humming a sweet, lovely tune. It made my heart swell with joy. My eyes closed involuntarily. He continued to hum. I continued to lose myself to the sleep I didn't think I'd be able to have that night._

_Sometime in the night, I almost thought I heard him say, "This is what you mean to me" after he finished his song. _

_But, then again, it may as well have been my dreams playing tricks on me again._

The mere memory of his touches, his sweet words, and actions, sent shivers up and down my spine and made me see beautiful things that were no where near me. Could it be possible that maybe I could be… that I felt… that I was in love with him?

I shook my head, shaking all the feelings away. No, of course not. That would be like being in love with my brother.

I was just not thinking straight that day…

**A/N: OMG ALICE WHY MUST YOU BE SO GOT DAMN RETARDED?! -_-;**

**That song Jasper hummed for her is a song you can find that I linked to on my profile. It's along the bottom. You should go listen to it lykenaoplz.**

**For those who didn't notice, this chapter is serving more as a peek into how the Alice/Jasper relationship developed in this story. These were mostly bits and pieces that I cut out of previous chapter when my editor told me that they were unnecessary and other kinds of crap like that. lol**

**Review, please 0:-)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Alice's POV – Age 16**

"Hello?"

My phone had been ringing and, as always, I answered on the first ring.

Well, as always for _him_. He was the only person I ever answered so quickly.

"Hey, babe," he answered. I could hear the smile in his voice. "Guess what I just heard?"

I giggled. "What's that?"

"Well, apparently, heaven's missing an angel," he said. I could almost see the smirk on his face. "Her name is Alice Brandon—maybe you've heard of her."

"Aw, you're so beyond sweet." I smiled. "Now I _know _you didn't call me just to make me smile. What's up?"

"I was just wondering if you wanted to join me for lunch at the park in about an hour," he said in his most romantic voice. "Anything you'd like to eat."

"You know you're the best boyfriend in the entire world?" I crooned. "But I'm sorry, I can't. Mom says we have to go pick up my cousin from the airport. My aunt and uncle died, and my mom has to take her in till she's eighteen."

"Oh, Alice, I'm so sorry," he said. "Do you need me?"

"No, no, I'm fine," I answered truthfully. "I never knew them well anyway. I just know Charlotte's ridiculously pretty. I hope she doesn't steal you away from me. Ha, ha." Charlotte was my cousin. I hadn't seen her in person since we were three, but Mom had showed Bella and me some pictures. She was about my height, pale, and blonde. And gorgeous.

"Now, we know no one could ever do that," he said. "Besides, you're a thousand times prettier than anyone else on the planet."

I sighed contentedly. "You're so amazing."

"Alice!" rang my mom's voice from downstairs. "Let's get a move on, honey! We need to get to the airport in an hour."

"Coming!" I called back. "I have to go."

"Oh, okay. Call me later, alright?"

"Of course."

"I love you, Alice," he said, his voice filled with true admiration.

"Oh! I love you, too, Peter." I blew him a kiss through the phone and hung up, shoving my phone in my pocket, my heart throbbing.

How could I have ever thought there was someone out there better for me? I absolutely adored Peter. Was I in love with him? Well, no. But I did love him. Just… not to that extent. _Yet_.

I grabbed my purse off my bedside table, taking a moment to admire the framed picture of Peter and me at the beach. I reached out to touch the frame with the tip of my finger, when the bracelet that hung from my wrist caught my attention. The sunlight coming in from the window shone off of it. I'd tried not to think about him, but it was seemingly unavoidable, since everything in my life somehow reminded me of him.

Jasper.

I hadn't heard from him since the day I told him I was going out with Peter again, and that things were getting serious.

He'd hung up without saying anything, and that alone was more hurtful than any words he could've said.

I pushed him from my thoughts for the time being and went downstairs where Mom and Bella were waiting impatiently.

"Alice, what took you so long?" Mom asked, ushering a coat into my hands and opening the door.

"Sorry, Mom, I was—"

"On the phone," Bella finished for me. "We heard. _Oh, I love you, Peter!_" she mocked.

"I think that sounds more like what you do with Edward on the phone, Bells," I snapped right back as Mom pushed us both out the door. Bella turned bright red, and said nothing more. She and Edward were finally going out, and I couldn't have been happier for her. Poor Emmett was always a fifth wheel, but he made his point clear that the only girl for him was Rose. None of us dared try and change his mind.

Once we were a good five minutes away from the airport, it started raining.

"Well, that's not what I had in mind for excitement," I mused to myself.

"What do you mean, Alice?" Bella asked, her blushing cheeks finally going from a flaming red to their normal paleness.

"I keep thinking that something exciting is going to be happening today," I said, jumping a bit in my seat. "And, no, I don't mean Charlotte."

"Charlotte," my mom said, almost robotically. "Good God, I'm going to have another girl to take care of."

She pulled into the parking lot of the airport, unbuckled her seatbelt, and turned to face us.

"Okay, girls, listen to me," she said sternly. "For the first few weeks, Charlotte's going to have to room with one of you. Just until the bed we ordered for her arrives."

"She can room with me," I chirped.

"That's fine," Mom said. "You girls are going to have to show her the ropes around here. She's moving here from Biloxi, which means starting over in a new town with new people and a new school. On top of that, she's just lost both her parents, poor girl. She must be heartbroken."

…

"Oh, my gosh, Auntie Marissa!"

Charlotte was coming at us full speed, decked out in a mostly white outfit. Cashmere white dress, matching white poncho, stereotypical-French-style white beret, and stand-out brown leather boots. Her white-blonde hair was a couple shades darker than her pale skin, and she was about my height, meaning she was _short_.

She had a million dollar smile on her face as she threw her arms around Mom's waist.

Heartbroken, eh?

Mom seemed caught off guard by Charlotte's happiness. I guess she expected to be wiping tears. Ha.

"Um—hey, Charlotte, honey," Mom said. "How are you doing?"

"Oh, I'm doing great, Auntie Marissa!" Charlotte responded in the sort of voice you'd expect from a cheerleader. She was entertaining to listen to. "Do you see this outfit? I _just _bought it and—oh! You mean about that."

Mom had been staring at Charlotte with confused, saddened eyes, and Charlotte had finally acknowledged that.

I didn't expect her eyes to fill with tears or her perfect complexion to turn blotchy and red, even before the tears fell. She dabbed at her eyes with the corner of her poncho and tried as best she could to shield her face with her hair.

"I—I'm sorry," she sputtered. "I'll be right back."

And with that, she left her luggage beside us and ran to the nearest bathroom. I saw her disappear through the door, and I looked to my mom, who I knew was just about ready to go on after her.

"I'll go, Mom," I told her. I reassured her by giving her pat on her arm and scurried off to the bathroom, where Charlotte was sitting next to a sink and blowing her nose into a piece of toilet paper.

"Oh," she gasped when she saw me, sniffling and throwing the paper away. "Alice. I didn't know you were there."

"Are you okay?" I asked, taking a seat beside her. Thank goodness we were both tiny. The counter we were sitting on with the sinks might've collapsed by then.

"I lost my parents, Alice," she sobbed. She looked me in the eyes. "Do I look okay?"

I grimaced. "Not really." I took another piece of toilet paper from her small stack and wiped her new tears. "Stop crying, why don't you? Your parents wouldn't have wanted you to be sad."

"That's nice. Have any more clichés?" she snapped.

Jeez. Attitude much.

"Listen, I don't know what it feels like to lose a parent," I said sternly. "Much less two. But if you shut people out like you're trying to shut me out, you'll never get over this."

"And what if I don't want to, then?"

"Listen to me," I said. "You can shed tears because they're gone, or you can smile because they lived."

Charlotte looked away from me, and pretended to ignore me, but I could hear small whimpers escaping her lips. My eyes stung with tears over the aunt and uncle I'd barely known, and for the girl next to me, who needed so much help but didn't want anyone to help her.

"You could close your eyes and pray they'll come back," I told her. "Or you could open your eyes and see all that they've left behind."

"They left me behind!" she croaked.

A single tear slipped down my cheek. I hadn't thought she'd take it that way.

"Your heart can be empty because you can't see them," I continued. "Or you can be filled with the love you shared.

"You can turn your back on tomorrow and live in yesterday, or you can be happy for tomorrow _because _of yesterday."

She was shaking now, but I wouldn't stop. Not until she let me in. Not until she opened up. Not until she let it out.

"You could remember only that they are gone, or you could cherish their memories and help them live on."

Charlotte was sobbing quietly now, and more tears were leaking from my eyes. My hand was inching toward her. I didn't know if putting a comforting hand on her shoulder would calm her and create a bond of trust, or if it would snap her out of it and she'd stop showing any emotion. I brought my hand back to my lap and continued.

"You can cry and close your mind—be empty and turn your back—or—"

"Stop," she whimpered. "Please, please stop."

But I wouldn't stop.

"Or you could do what they'd want—"

"Alice, please…"

"Smile, open your eyes, love, and go on."

She broke down sobbing then. Her body shook with the force of her tears, and her cries echoed across the bathroom walls. I scooted toward her and put my arm around her shoulder.

"How—could they—leave—me?!" she yelped. My heart went out to her. She sounded like she was in physical and emotional pain all at once.

"I—depended—on—them!" she cried. "I—loved—them!"

Her sobs were horrifying—the sort of thing that would frighten small children. But I didn't leave her side. I knew she needed someone right now, even if it was someone she hardly knew.

"And they love you too, Charlotte," I said. "Wherever they are now, they're looking down on you, and they're immensely proud of you, and they're happy that you're being taken in by people who will care for you. That car accident wasn't their fault. Drunk drivers…" I knew I should stop there.

"It's not fair!" she said, and I knew she was trying her hardest to keep from sobbing out loud again. "Why them? Why not—why not me?"

"Charlotte!" I gasped. "Don't you _ever _say that. Things happen for a reason, no matter how irrational or unfair they may seem. If it wasn't your time, it wasn't your time."

"I wish I'd been in that car with them," she whispered.

"No you don't."

I saw her open her mouth to answer, but she didn't get a chance. The bathroom door swung open and Bella let herself in.

"Hey, Charlotte," she said in her most soothing voice. "Are you okay?"

Charlotte blotted at her face and put on a surprisingly genuine smile.

"I'm much better now," she said sincerely.

"Well, that's good to hear," Bella said. "Mom says we need to get going. You ready?"

I gave Charlotte's shoulders an encouraging squeeze.

"Ready," she said, hopping off her seat. I followed suit.

And though Charlotte's face was still stained with tears, a smile was painted onto her face, and her expression radiated closure.

I knew Bella and I had just gained another sister, that we would care for and love, just like we did one another. I hoped Charlotte would be able to make it through her past hardships, and though I should've been focusing all my attention on her and paying more attention to what Bella was talking to her about, but there was still something nagging at me in the back of my head… something amazing was supposed to happen today. I just didn't know what.

I saw the WELCOME TO FORKS sign after another hour in the car through the window. I knew our house wasn't far off.

"Ugh, there's someone parked in front of our house," Mom said, trying to peer through the rain. "Who could it be?"

I squinted and tried my best to see who it was. I could make out the figure of a tall, lean, honey-haired male leaning against a car.

But… no. It couldn't be.

Or was it?

I looked again.

But it was.

There _he _was.

Jasper.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: I'm not sure what the legal rules for being able to drive a car are, but how about, for the purpose of this story, we make it sixteen, because I know it was like that at some point in time. lol**

**Alice's POV – Age 16 **

I didn't believe what I was seeing. It couldn't be Jasper. It just couldn't.

And yet it was. As we neared the house, I could see his parents standing in the background. Rose stood next to him, waving excitedly at the car. I rolled down the window, despite the pouring rain. Jasper's eyes locked with mine and he gave a sheepish smile. My mind wasn't functioning enough to formulate a response.

"Ooh, who's the cutie in your driveway, Alice?" Charlotte crooned. My head snapped to the side, where I saw her combing out her flawless hair with her fingers and straightening her beret. She took a mirror out of her pocket, admired her reflection for a second, and put it away again. I felt a pang of anger that I shook away instantly. Why should I care if she thinks Jasper's handsome? He definitely was—I told him all the time. Or, I used to tell him, before he started ignoring me.

Mom stopped the car at the curb and climbed out as if she were in a dream. The rain turned to drizzle, which cleared away after a few moments. Bella and Charlotte got out of the car. I couldn't move.

I saw Mom embrace Jasper's mother, then his father, then Rosalie, then Jasper. Bella followed suit. Charlotte waved politely to his parents and Rosalie before flashing a flirtatious smile at Jazz and saying something I couldn't hear. Jasper didn't seem to hear her either.

He was walking toward my car door now, his pace quickening with every step he took until he broke into a jog. He was so much taller than I remembered, and more muscular. His face had lost the roundness it'd had so many years before and his hair was sharper. He was paler and there were some dark circles under his eyes, but the Jasper I'd loved like a brother all my life was still there.

The second he opened the car door, I leapt out, throwing myself into his arms. He responded with such enthusiasm that he swept me off my feet and into the air. I held on tight to him, as if letting go would mean he'd leave again.

I couldn't see the red face of Charlotte, or the smug faces of Rose and Bella. There was just Jasper, my big brother, my best friend. He was everything. Everything was him. Until…

"Alice?"

Peter's voice snapped me out of it. Jasper set me on my feet and took a few steps to the side. Peter was standing in front of me, looking dumbstruck and jealous. There was a rose in his hand—he'd always bring me one, even if it was a casual visit. It was sort of a tradition.

"Hi, Peter," I said, moving forward awkwardly to give him a hug. He stepped back and handed me the flower instead. As I took it, I felt my face turning red. Peter looked hurt.

"I swear it's not what you think," I whispered.

"Oh, I know it's not," he answered, his attempt at appearing unbothered failing miserably. "You were just happy at seeing an old friend. I get it. How've you been, Jasper?"

Peter held out his hand toward Jazz, who responded with a firm shake. His hands were bigger than Peter's by a long shot, yet he still moved them with grace.

"Fine, thanks," Jazz responded. His voice was deeper and had a slight Southern twang to it. It was melodic, musical.

"I see I'm interrupting a bit of a reunion," Peter said. "So I think I'll just go."

"No!" I said, a second too late to be considered a coherent response. "Stay. You told me you wanted to go to lunch. I'm sure I can catch up with them later. It's okay if I go with Peter, right, Mom?"  
Mom looked slightly confused and caught off guard.

"Um, Alice, the Hales just got back from being in Texas for years," she said hesitantly. "Don't you want to catch up, or something?"

"She can do that later," Jasper said coldly, as if we hadn't just shared a warm, friendly hug. How sad. "Let her go."

Mom's eyes were wide, as if she didn't know what to think or say about the situation.

"Oh, Marissa, let the girl go. We'll still be here when she gets back," Jasper's mom said, winking at me. I smiled gratefully, yet uncomfortably.

"Alright," Mom said. "Be home by five, please. You need to show Charlotte around town."

"I could do that," Jasper offered. I saw Charlotte turn red and smile shyly. Ugh. That was _not _sickening at all; that did _not _piss me off at all.

"Perfect," Mom said. "Well, off you go, Alice. It was nice seeing you, too, Peter. Be home by five!" she tacked on as a reminder.

I barely heard her. We were already heading toward Peter's car. He held my hand in his, stroking my thumb. And yet, I felt cold. It wasn't as if his every touch sent shivers up and down my spine and made my cheeks go red, but at least I felt something on a normal basis.

Today, I felt nothing.

I felt nothing as I sat down in his hair next to him; I felt nothing as he took my hand in his once more. Jasper had always held my hand with such tenderness and care. Peter's hold was more protective. It made me feel awkward.

"So, Jasper's back, is he?" Peter said, breaking the silence. His voice startled me.

"What?" I said instinctively, unable to process his words immediately. "Oh. Yeah."

"You happy?"

"Insanely."

"You don't sound too happy."

"Well I am."

It was quiet again for a few more seconds other than Peter's sharp intakes of breath and my slow breathing.

"And that short girl with the blonde hair is your cousin?" he asked.

"Uh-huh."

"She has a thing for Jasper."

"No kidding."

"That bug you?"

"Little bit," I said before I could stop myself.

I didn't have to look Peter straight in the eye to see that he looked hurt.

"No, no," I said, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. "It's just… I don't know a ton about her, you know? She might be the type of girl that plays games. I don't want my big brother to get hurt if she tries to mess with him." I put a subtle emphasis on the word _brother_.

"You know, on second thought, Alice, her parents just died," Peter said. "I'm sure dating is the last thing on her mind."

"You'd be surprised," I muttered. "Girls are stupid sometimes."

Heh. No kidding.

Yes, I thought I was being ridiculously stupid. Why did I care about the type of girl Jasper went after? If he wanted to join in whatever game Charlotte could play with him, then I wouldn't have anything to say about it.

But, then again, I was jumping to conclusions. Who said that Charlotte was the type of girl to play games? Who said she was even deeply interested in Jasper? Maybe she was just a flirty girl. Yeah, that was it…

"Alice, did you hear anything I just said?" Peter asked.

"Wait… what?" I searched my mind for any detail I might have picked up from the conversation I didn't realize I was participating in. "Oh. Yeah. Um. How bout them cats?"

He sighed and turned on the street that led to the park. To my surprise, he drove on by.

"What happened?" I asked. "I thought you wanted to go to the park."

"Changed my mind," he answered. "Figured I'd take you somewhere else."

When I saw the sign that signaled the entrance to La Push, I was still confused. Where were we…?

I saw it when he turned again. The beach. We hadn't been to the beach since our first date. I looked at him curiously. He just smiled a half smile and parked the car. He climbed out of the car and was already opening my door when I'd unbuckled my seatbelt. He held out his hand for me. I pretended not to see it and let myself out. I could feel his confusion long before I saw it on his face. I just smiled a very fake smile and pecked him lightly on the cheek, my lips barely touching his face.

We walked an arm's length apart up the cliff until we reached the top. There was a bench at the top, and we both took a seat. Before I could scoot away a few inches, he put his arm around me and drew me close to him. Out of instinct, I rested my head on his shoulder. But the movement felt wrong. I remembered all the times I'd leaned my head on Jasper's shoulder, and how that small motion alone would comfort me in any situation.

We sat in silence, but it wasn't the silence I'd sit through for hours with Jazz. Those silences were comfortable, happy, and calm. But this was different. It was the sort of silence you'd find between two people who hadn't seen each other since they were five and scarcely remembered anything about one another. Vaguely familiar, yet very, very, very ill at ease.

"Alice, could I give you something?" Peter asked me out of the blue. The sun was setting, though it wasn't even five yet. That was what you got during those autumn evenings in the Olympic Peninsula.

"What is it?" I asked, straightening in my seat. He took his arm from around my shoulders and dug in his pockets for something.

"Close your eyes," he instructed.

I did as he told me.

"Now hold out your arm."

I held out the arm that had the bracelet Jasper had given me all those years ago dangling from it. I heard Peter sigh.

"Your other arm."

Done.

I felt something cold clasp around my wrist.

"Now, open."

It was a thin, silver bracelet with small seashells embedded every couple spaces. It was nothing extravagant, but it was nice.

"I love it," I said as sincerely as I could manage. Was it truly so horrible that I had to compare it to the one Jazz had given me?

"Glad you do," he said. He stood up, obviously not expecting any other form of gratitude. I stood as well.

"Now let's get you home," he said. "It's five. Your mom will be expecting you."

"Yeah. Good thinking."

We rode in silence, and he didn't even bother to walk me to my door when we got to the house. I hurried to the door and sighed in relief when Bella answered.

"What took you so long?" she asked, with a piece of bread hanging out of her mouth. "It's nearly six. Mom was ready to bust her top."

"Sorry, we got held up," I lied.

"Where's Peter?" she asked, swallowing her snack.

"He left."

And that was all that was said on the subject.

"Where are Jazz and Rose?" I asked, putting my jacket on the coat rack.

"Rose and her parents went home," she answered. "They have to get settled in their house again. Can you believe they were able to keep that thing this whole time?"

"Yeah, surprising," I muttered. "And Jazz?"

"He's still out with Charlotte," Bella said, leaning against the doorframe. "Does that bug you?"

I flung one of my gloves at her and stomped up the stairs. No, it did not bug me. Not at all. Jasper was a friend, and Charlotte was just a girl who was interested. Why should I care? Huh? Why. Should. I. Care?!

I slammed the door to my room harder than I'd intended. It might've been a minute, it might've been an hour till Charlotte settled herself into the rubber mattress next to my bed. I was still awake, and she didn't go more than thirty seconds without sighing contentedly.

"Your friend Jasper is very kind," she sighed.

"Yep."

"And very… nice looking."

"Uh-huh."

"He's taking me to school on Monday," she said. "He said he'd show me around."

"That's _great._ Listen, Charlotte, I know you might be jetlagged or something, but I'm tired. Let me sleep."

"Oh. Okay. Sorry. Good night."

I didn't respond. Instead, I punched my pillow repeatedly and imagined tipping over my bedside table right onto her stupid, perfect little face.

But that was irrational. I didn't even have a legit reason to do that… yeah. Nope. No reason whatsoever.


	15. Chapter 15

Alice's POV – Age 16

It was Monday morning. My alarm buzzed loudly, waking me from the worst sleep I'd had since the fifth grade. I'd kept waking up in tears, my face red. I'd spend most of the night in the bathroom, blowing my nose. I'd cried a lot because of dreams I didn't remember, and I had a killer headache. I stumbled out of bed, tripping over Charlotte's impromptu mattress. The little witch wasn't there. She was probably in the bathroom putting stupid makeup on her stupid face and combing her stupid hair.

I was practically falling over my own feet, something I'd never done before. That was Bella's thing. The light in the kitchen gave me morning glare. I'd been looking forward to being the only one awake.

Of course, it was Charlotte in the kitchen. She was scurrying around making breakfast in her pink pajamas and Hello Kitty slippers. Her hair was in a messy French braid, and she still looked perfect. It was mildly sickening.

"Good morning, sleepy head," she said when she saw me. She put a plate of food on the table. "Made you breakfast."

"Thanks, Charlotte," I muttered. She was happy. Damn her for being happy.

I sat at the place she'd set for me and took a swig of milk. I contemplated where she might have gotten poison and how she could've disguised it in my breakfast. Okay; I didn't really believe she'd poison me, but it was better to be safe than sorry, right?

The noise in the kitchen had woken Jacob. The dog stumbled into the room looking at grumpy as a dog could. He settled himself by my feet. I took a piece of bacon and fed it to him. If it was poisoned, he'd drop dead, and I wouldn't eat it. What? I never liked the stupid thing.

But sadly, the only reaction I got was him jumping up and begging for more. I rolled my eyes and took a bite of the breakfast. It was delicious. Damn. She just _had _to be perfect, didn't she?

I was halfway done when Bella finally found her way downstairs.

"Mm, smells good, Charlotte," she said, taking a seat across from me. I glared at her. She didn't notice me. Charlotte set a plate for Bella, then one for herself.

"Eat up," she sang. Bella dug in and made a noise of appreciation.

"This is excellent," she said, giving Charlotte a thumb up. Charlotte beamed. I wondered if stabbing her with my fork would kill her or not.

"Glad you like it," Charlotte said. "Orange juice?"

The morning dragged on. We finished our breakfast, and Miss Perfect insisted she do the dishes while we got ready. Of course it wouldn't take long for _her _to get ready. She was like Rosalie—she woke up looking beautiful. At least Rosalie wasn't a filthy little beast.

Once upstairs, I threw on a pair of neon pink skinny jeans, an electric blue shirt, matching ballet flats, and a neon yellowish green jacket with black spots. It was one of my favorite outfits that I wore when I was happy. Today, I was just hoping it would make me look happier than I was.

I was the first one ready. I waited by the door for Bella and Charlotte. Bella was done quickly. She threw her brown jacket on over her black shirt and dusted off her jeans.

"I found these in the back of my closet," she said. "Can't believe they still fit. I haven't worn them since we were thirteen."

"That's great, Bells," I muttered, pulling my phone out of my pocket. It was seven o' clock exactly. Stupid Charlotte was going to make us late.

As if on cue, she came bouncing down the stairs. I pursed my lips when I saw her. Plaid skirt, plaid flower in her hair, black cashmere turtle-neck, and black flats. I had a sudden urge to cut off all her hair. _Calm yourself, Alice. She's not worth it._

"Ready," she said, spinning herself around.

"Wow, Charlotte, you look great," Bella noted. Maybe I should cut off _both _their hair…

"I know right?" Charlotte said, peeking out the window. "Ooh, look, there's Jasper!" She waved and I resisted the urge to look out the window as well, just to make sure it was really him and that the day before hadn't been just a dream.

Charlotte bounced out the door and skipped over to the red BMW Jasper was driving. Wow, Rose had actually let him borrow her car. Someone was feeling generous. Or maybe someone just wanted to piss me off. Well, I wasn't about to give her the satisfaction. I wasn't pissed at all. I was _happy_, dammit. I even hugged Charlotte and waved at Jasper as I walked past the car.

"Whoa, what are you doing?" he asked, climbing out of the car. "It's freezing out. You can't walk to school in this weather."

"Are you kidding?" I said. "I'm not cold." _Stop shivering, Alice, gosh!_

"Sure you're not," he said. He pulled me into a hug and rubbed his palms against my arms. Could he tell that I couldn't breathe? Could he hear my heart beating faster and faster? "Let me give you a ride."

"But you're giving _her _a ride," I muttered.

"There's something called a backseat," he teased. I grimaced. "Besides, I'm giving Rose a ride, too."

"Hi, Alice!" Rose yelled, putting her head through the window. I waved.

"Fine," I said, stomping over to the car.

"You want a ride, too, Bells?" Jasper asked. "It's a big backseat."

_Hopefully you and my cousin didn't do anything in that _big backseat _last night. I have to sit there_, I thought.

"Nah, Edward gives me rides to school," she said. "I'll just wait."

"Alright then," Jasper said. "See you at school." He got back into the driver's seat and I climbed into the back. Charlotte sat in the front seat.

"Good morning," Rose said.

"What's so good about it?" I grumbled. I didn't have to turn my head to see her smug smile. I had a perfect view of it through the reflection of the window.

I was silent the entire way to school. Jasper and Charlotte held up a very long and flirty conversation with Rose contributing every few minutes. I had my cheek against the seat and my knees pulled up against my chest. Once Rose commented on it. I told her it was because I was cold. Jasper turned up the heat, and since I refused to move, the hot air was hitting me right in the face and giving me a feeling of suffocation. Good morning _indeed._

I climbed out of the car as soon as I was allowed. Rose, Jasper, and Charlotte headed to the main office to pick up their schedules. I pulled my hood over my head and hurried to my first class, thinking I was late. In fact, I was early. I was the first person in Biology. Even Mr. Myers wasn't there.

I took my usual seat at the back of the class. I had no lab partner as there were an odd number of students in the class, but I'd never minded. It seemed easier to me doing the work along than having another person to worry about.

The first bell rung, and finally people started coming into the classroom. I took my sweater off knowing that the body warmth and the now-activated heater would start to warm me soon enough.

Mr. Myers came in with an antique-looking television. I sighed. Monday. Video day. The day when Mr. Myers was too tired out from his weekend of drinking to teach us. I'd taken my Bio book out, forgetting that I wouldn't need it. I shoved it back into my bag and pulled out my binder to finish the trig homework I'd neglected because of the weekend's excitements.

Emmett, who was usually the first person in the class, came in seconds before the second bell rang. He walked over to my table as he usually did before class. This morning he looked as if he were stuck in a dream.

"Emmett, you have lip gloss on?" I laughed. "Is there something you're trying to let out here?"

He wiped off his mouth. "Rosalie," was all he said.

I rolled my eyes and went back to trying to solve an impossible problem as he gabbed about how happy he was that she was back. When the third bell rung, the late bell, Emmett hurried back off to his seat, as if doing things quicker would mean class would be over sooner and he'd get to be with Rose again. I smiled.

Mr. Myers took attendance, and I muttered a barely audible "Here" when my name was called. He was just popping in the video when a tall, blonde guy walked into the room. Jasper. I sighed and closed my binder before starting to clear up all my crap from the opposite side of the desk. Goodbye extra seating.

"Ah, yes, Mr. Hale," Mr. Myers said, hiccupping. "I was told you'd be joining this class. Why don't you take a seat next to Ms. Cullen? Uh, Alice. Raise your hand, please, so he knows who—"

"I know who she is," Jasper said, nodding. "Thank you."

He strode back to the table and hopped into the seat beside me. I toyed with the sleeves of my jacket, my hands shaking with the force of my heavily beating heart.

"Mr. Newton, spit out your gum," Mr. Myers sighed. "Ms. Cullen, take off your hood."

I pulled my hood off my head and crossed my arms. Mr. Myers turned off the lights and played the video. I laid my head on my desk, deliberately facing away from the television, away from Jasper.

I heard the tearing of paper, the quick scribbling of a pencil, before I felt the note hit my elbow. I sat up slowly and unfolded the paper to find three words written in Jasper's messy scrawl.

_Are you okay?_

I dug for a pencil in my bag. Once I found one, I wrote out a short response.

_I'm fine._

I tossed back the paper to him, twiddling my thumbs as I awaited his response. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him stare at the words I'd written for multiple seconds before he wrote back.

_I missed you, Alice. A lot._

_Good to know, _was all I wrote.

I heard his heavy sigh next to me. I saw him move to crumple up the paper, but halfway through the gesture he responded again.

_Please talk to me._

_I thought that's what I've been doing._

_You know what I mean, Alice._

_Oh, do I, now?_

He sighed again. I knew I was being a bitch. Frankly, I didn't care.

_Ditch second period with me._

_What? Are you insane? It's your first day back, and you're already trying to ditch, and make me ditch with you?_

_Yep. You in?_

I hesitated, even though I was positive of my answer. The pencil in my hand hovered an inch over the paper. I sighed.

_I'll meet you at your car after class._

I knew there was a satisfied smirk on his face before I saw it. He reached over and put his arm around my shoulders, gave me a squeeze, and let go.

I couldn't breathe properly for the rest of the period.

Jasper was gone seconds after the bell rung, the smug smile never leaving his face. I was putting my books in my bag, my head whirling.

Jazz was my best friend, my big brother. Why did my skin burn at his touch? Why did my heart beat fast whenever I saw him?

And, most importantly… why wasn't _Peter _making me feel this way?

I knew we probably weren't going to come back for third period, so I went to my locker and got all the things I'd need to catch up on the homework I'd been ignoring for the past week. When I closed my locker, and turned to walk, who did I bump into but Peter, who was purposelate to class just to talk to me. The hallways were empty. It was just the two of us. I glanced at the clock. Jasper was waiting for me.

"Hey, Alice, can we talk?" Peter ly being said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Listen, Peter, I'd love to, but I'm late for class," I lied.

"No, it'll only take a second," he insisted. He put one arm on either side of me so I was pinned to the locker. My palms were sweating so bad, I thought my notebooks were going to slip out of my hands.

"Alice… is there something going on?" he asked. "I feel like you haven't been being yourself lately."

"Who said I wasn't being myself?" I said, trying really hard to be nonchalant.

"I don't know," he said. "Ever since Jasper got back…"

"This is about Jasper?" I said, laughing, and pretending that he was being ridiculous. "Peter, you know that's insane. Jasper's like my brother. Besides, you know you're the only guy for me."

I stretched up on my toes and gave him a sweet kiss. I hoped it didn't feel as wrong to him as it did to me.

"Don't forget about date night, okay?" he said once I'd slipped out from under his arms. "I made reservations at the best place in Seattle."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world."

No matter how sincere I sounded, or how good of an actress I was, I felt Peter's bitter, confused eyes on my back as I headed for the exit of the hallway.

And I knew that he knew my next class wasn't outdoors.


	16. Chapter 16

**Alice's POV - Age 16**

"What took you so long? I thought you were going to leave me hanging."

I slammed the door of the car and started warming my palms in the warmth of the heater. "Sorry. I ran into a friend."

He nodded, his blonde hair shifting to cover one of his eyes, but didn't say anything.

"So where are we going?" I asked, putting my notebooks on the floor. It was then that I realized I'd left my jacket in my locker. Damn. I needed that.

"Not sure," was his answer. "I was hoping you had a plan."

"We have enough gas to drive to Port Angeles?"

"Port Angeles it is."

He smiled and turned onto the freeway. I made myself as comfortable as I could in Rosalie's leather seats. She seemed to think they were like clouds to sit on; I disagreed.

"Why Port Angeles?" Jasper suddenly asked.

"It's really nice this time of year," I said. "And since most everyone is at school or work right now, it'll be quiet. Port Angeles is really nice when it's quiet."

He nodded. "Sounds fun," he said. "You gonna want to shop at all?"

I smiled despite myself. He knew me so well. "Maybe a little," I said. "But I mostly just want to hang around with you. I've missed you so much."

He took one hand off the steering wheel and held one of mine. He looked over and smiled. "I missed you, too, Alice." His thumb stroked the top of my hand. I just about melted.

"So you and Peter are pretty serious, eh?" Jasper said. The nonchalance in his voice almost hurt.

"I guess," I said, shrugging.

"Really now?" he said in a teasing voice. "Do I hear wedding bells in the future?"

I laughed. "Slow your roll," I said. "We're sixteen. But, you never know. Maybe." I smirked.

"You still keeping that promise about letting me be your best man?" he joked.

I giggled. "Jazz, come on. We made that promise in like the third grade."

"So I can't be your best man, then?" he said, feigning hurt. "You've replaced me?"

"No! No, no," I said, too fast for my liking. "You know I could never replace you. Of course you can be my best man at my wedding. I love you, Jazz."

He squeezed my hand. "I love you, too, Alice," he said softly; solemnly. "You're the best little sister I could've possibly asked for; better than Rosalie." He laughed. My heart dropped to my stomach.

Sister. Yeah.

_Oh, snap out of it, Alice. You're always calling him your big brother. It's not like you want him to be anything more than that._

It didn't take much longer to get to Port Angeles. The streets were mostly empty, just as I'd known they would be. Jasper parked in front of a large department store, one of my favorites. He opened my door and helped me step out of the car. As soon as I was out, the cold air hit me straight in the face. I let out a barely audible "Holy damn" and started rubbing my palms against my arms to keep myself warm.

Jasper noticed my fruitless attempts at trying to generate body heat. He pulled off his jacket and put it over my shoulders, reaching around my neck to fasten the top button. I slipped my arms in to the sleeves and tilted my head up soon enough to see him grin widely. His hands gave my shoulders a squeeze before he shifted to walking beside me with one arm around my waist. I curled into his side.

The day was, in a word, amazing. It made me glad that Forks High didn't take ditching seriously. As much as I hated to, I couldn't resist entering some of the large stores in the area. Jasper was the perfect gentleman. He sat outside the fitting rooms and gave his honestly bias opinion on everything. I laughed when I came out in a horrible green and orange ensemble and he said I looked beautiful.

But for the next half hour, I couldn't stop debating with myself if he was serious or not.

At checkout, we bickered over who got to pay. He'd put my credit card back in my wallet only to have me take it back out five seconds later at least half a dozen times before he took the wallet from my, held it up to where I couldn't reach, and paid with his own money. The cashier smiled and called us a lovely couple.

We walked out of the store laughing at the face she made when he told her that he was "my dad."

"I can't believe you paid for all that," I told him, handing him back his jacket and pulling on my new black coat.

"Well I couldn't very well let you pay for it," he said. "A gentleman never lets a lady pay."

"And, of course, you're the perfect gentleman."

"Of course."

We stopped on the street in front of a man. He was playing his guitar with an empty guitar case in front of him. There were two or three couples there, listening to him play and sing. A redheaded girl stood hand in hand with her boyfriend, and another girl was kissed by hers. Jasper took my hand and kissed it, then held it tightly by his side. I blushed and leaned into him as I listened to the music.

"_Give me more loving than I've ever had,_

_Make me feel better when I'm feeling sad_

_Tell me I'm special even when I know I'm not_

_Make me feel good when I hurt so bad_

_Barely getting mad_

_I'm so glad I found you_

_I love being around you_…"

I smiled. If there was a single song that almost summed up the way I felt about Jasper, it was this one. He'd been my best friend since we were little kids, and I loved him so much. He'd always played the role of the big brother I never had, with a few minor differences.

A big brother wasn't supposed to make your heart beat a thousand miles and hour when he was around. You weren't supposed to want to rip to shreds any girl that came near him. You weren't supposed to compare your boyfriend to him. He wasn't supposed to make you stutter over your words. His every touch wasn't supposed to send shivers up and down your spine.

Rain started falling. Jasper and I applauded with the rest of the small crowd that had formed around the man. We both reached out to drop money in his guitar case at the same time. I squeezed his hand, and he led me to the nearest restaurant.

It was one of those old-school diners, the only eatery in Port Angeles I'd never been to. We sat at one of the two-person booths and shook the water out of our hair, laughing as if we were kids again.

A waitress came, took our orders, and left, bringing back two banana smoothies and a promise that the food was on its way a couple of minutes later.

"You know, I never really noticed that, as twins, you and Bella are complete failures," Jasper joked.

"Yeah, you're right," I said, laughing. "We couldn't be more different, as far as looks go. She's tall and beautiful. I'm…"

"Short and beautiful?" he supplied. I tossed the wrapper of my straw at him.

"I can't say I exactly trust your opinion on the matter," I said, taking a sip of the smoothie in front of me.

"I don't see why you wouldn't," he said. "Don't you trust me?"

"What kind of question is that, Jazz? You know I trust you with everything."

"And is trusting my any different than trusting my opinion?"

I glared at him playfully. "When did you become such a smart ass?"

"When we were little," he said, smiling. "It's one of the things you've always loved about me."

"Oh, right." I laughed. "I forgot."

The waitress returned at that moment and we both straightened in our seats as she set down two burgers and a large plate of fries.

"Wave me over if you need anything," she said. I nodded, never taking my eyes off Jasper.

I took a fry from the plate and munched on it, thinking.

"Hey, remember that time we tried to take your mom's car because we thought we could drive it to the toy store?"

He put his burger down and chuckled. "And how we couldn't even figure out where the ignition was."

"And how we tried to stick the key in the steering wheel."

"And, of course, how we ended up…"

"Locking ourselves in the car!"

We laughed at the memory. It had been a good hour before anyone thought to look for us in the garage. Sure, we'd gotten a good talking to from our dads, but the experience had served as a good moment for reminiscing.

That sparked a conversation of stupid things we'd done together as little kids. The time I tried to go over the top of the swings and ended up falling off, the time he tried to climb a tree with me on his back, the time he helped me shoplift because we didn't know it was illegal, the time we fell asleep in the backyard, under the stars, only to have the sprinklers wake us up in the morning…

We finished eating and paid for our food only to find that it was already dark out. It was already six. I knew my mom was probably freaking out.

"Let's get home," I said. "Our parents are already gonna kill us for ditching school. Let's not give them another reason to."

He smiled at me. We went back to the car and drove home in mostly silence. The only noise was the sound of our breathing, the rain pattering on the windows, and his occasional humming of songs I didn't know.

He pulled into the driveway at my house. I breathed a sigh of relief when I realized neither of my parents were home yet. I leaned over to give him a hug goodbye, but he was already climbing out of the car, intending on walking me to my door.

I grabbed the bags of clothing he'd bought me along with my backpack and followed him to the front door. Once there, I set the bags on the ground, rang the doorbell, and knocked twice. _Open the door, Bella. It's effing cold out here. _

Bella wasn't answering the door, no matter how many times I knocked. I turned to Jasper in the mean time.

"Thanks for a great day, Jazz," I said. "I had an amazing time."

"It was my pleasure, m'lady," he said, grinning and bending to kiss my hand. I laughed.

It was still raining. I looked down at my hands. We were quiet for a moment.

"Jazz, I need to… tell you something," I whispered. I looked up at him through my lashes to see him staring intently at me.

"You can tell me anything, Alice."

"Jasper, I…"

"_There _you are, Alice! God! I've been worried as hell! I had to cover for you when Mom called. You're so damn lucky she's not home yet! Oh, hey, Jasper."

_Bella! _I yelled at her in my head. She grabbed my sleeve and pulled me inside.

"Night, Alice," was the last thing I heard before Bella slammed the door in his face.

"Why didn't you answer the freaking door sooner?" I said, my cheeks burning red from what had just happened.

"Because," she muttered. "I was… er…"

"Hey, Bella, who was at the… oh, hey, Alice."

It was Edward with the exact shade of lipstick Bella was wearing smeared on his face.

"You left me out there in the cold rain, freezing my ass off, because you were making out with Edward."

"Well…"

"Oh, never mind." I took my coat off and left it on the sofa. "I'm going upstairs. Have fun, kids."

I stormed up the stairs, only to meet Charlotte half way to my room.

"Hey, Alice, I got my bed today! That's great, right? We all have our own rooms now!" she squealed.

"Great," I said, feigning happiness. I went into my room, eternally grateful for the privacy, and slammed the door.

I curled up on my bed, thoughts buzzing through my head at a million miles per hour.

I was in love with Jasper Hale, and I had no idea what to do about it.


	17. Chapter 17

**Alice's POV - Age 16**

"Alice, what are you doing?"

I tore my eyes away from the television screen to see Bella standing in the doorway. I paused the film.

"Watching a movie," I said. "Hence the DVD player and bowl of popcorn."

"Do you know what day it is?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips in a very mom-like fashion.

"Yeah," I said, putting _Titanic _on play again and tossing some popcorn into my mouth. "It's Friday night."

"And what's special about Friday night?"

I pondered her question for a moment. Friday night, Friday night…

And just as Jack and Rose shared a passionate kiss on the screen, it hit me.

"Oh _shit_," I exclaimed, jumping out of my seat. "Date night. I completely forgot."

"Yeah," she said, but I barely heard her. By the time the word had left her mouth, I was already half way up the stairs.

I glanced at the clock on my nightstand. I had half an hour. How could date night have slipped my mind? I'd been thinking about (more like dreading) it all week. I didn't know what I was going to do. I didn't have the heart to break up with Peter. He was just so sweet and kind and loving. But… I didn't love him.

I loved Jasper. I loved him more than my sixteen year old self could understand. And I would never feel that way about Peter.

I sighed, pulling the first dress my hands found over my head. It was my favorite: the one with the scoop neck, the grey top, the black waist, and the red skirt. I put on a jeweled black necklace, and black flats. I ran my fingers through my hair and looked awkwardly in the mirror as I tried to straighten the dress to my liking. I reapplied the lip gloss I'd had on all day and went no further makeup-wise.

I spent the last ten minutes of my time pathetically trying to avoid thoughts of Jasper by debating on which purse I should take with me. During the last five minutes, I grabbed my red and black Dior bag and collapsed onto my bed. I pulled my knees to my chest and buried my face in my arms. There wasn't time for more than a single tear to slip out before I head Peter honking from outside.

I put on a headband as a last minute addition, remembering the time Jasper had complimented it, before heading downstairs.

"Hey, I'm going over to the Hale's place later," Bella reminded me. "Rose, Charlotte, and I have a project to work on, so the house will be empty when you get back. Charlotte's already over there. Mom and Dad said they wouldn't be back till tomorrow."

"Got it," I said. "See ya, Bells."

"Have fun!"

Yeah, right.

It was freezing outside, so I ran to Peter's car. Once inside, I cranked up the heater.

"Hey, Alice," he said, surprised that I didn't even bother with a hello.

"Oh, yeah, hey," I said. "Where'd you say we were going tonight?"

"Seaside Bay," he answered. I nodded. I'd only been there once, with my family. It overlooked La Push beach. Very private, very quiet, very expensive. I almost felt bad that he was spending so much money, but, on the other hand, I wasn't surprised. He'd always acted as though spoiling a woman was the way to her heart.

I could tell Peter knew something was wrong. He studied me carefully the entire car ride. I couldn't bring myself to care as much as I should've. My thoughts were on Jasper. His smile, his touch, his laugh, his eyes, his voice… everything about him was perfection in my eyes. His endless compliments made me laugh, which made him smile, which made my heart melt. Thinking of all the memories I'd made with him never failed to put me in a good mood. I'd always loved him, but this was so much different.

This love started a fire in my soul that could only burn brighter, hotter. This love made the butterflies in my stomach permanent. It made my cheeks turn red, my hands shake, my heart clench. It was beautiful. It was painful. It was confusing. It was impossible. It was the most spectacular thing I'd ever felt, and ten times greater than anything I could've imagined it to be.

But it also filled me with guilt. I felt horrible that I was doing this to Peter, but I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to hurt him, even though I knew that with every second I kept pretending that my heart was his, the end result of everything would just be more hurtful. I didn't want that to happen, but at the same time, I had no idea what to do. I was scared. I was young. I didn't know what I was doing, but that much was obvious.

Then there was the other dilemma: Jasper wasn't in love with me. He hadn't said anything about Charlotte, but I knew she had the hugest crush on him. With her looks, I imagined she could get him to fall for her whenever she deemed fit. I hated her for it.

It took me a while to realize that we'd arrived at the restaurant, and that Peter was holding my door open, expecting me to step out. I shook away my thoughts and pulled myself out of the car. He closed the door behind me and put one arm around my waist. I tried to keep as much distance between the two of us as I could without making it obvious.

While we were waiting for our table to become available, we sat on a bench inside. Peter pulled my close to him and kissed my forehead every few minutes. The whole thing felt so wrong to me. I felt as if I was betraying myself by being with Peter. I sighed.

Our table was ready, and we were led to a very private booth in the back of the restaurant. I looked at the menu, contributing to the conversation he was holding up with me without knowing what either of us was saying. Either he didn't notice something was wrong, or he was trying to ignore it.

The server came, took our orders, and returned with them about twenty minutes afterward. Glad for a reason to stop talking, I picked up my fork and started eating.

"Hey, whatever happened to that bracelet I gave you?" Peter asked all of a sudden. "I never see you wearing it anymore."

I dabbed at my mouth with a napkin. "Oh. I, um, let Bella borrow it. She hasn't given it back yet."

I lowered my eyes to the table, hoping he understood I didn't want to talk about it. The truth was, I'd taken it off the second my realization had hit. The only bracelet I ever wore anymore was the one Jasper had given me all those years ago, which I still only took off when I showered.

My eyes flew to the pearl bracelet, and I could feel my face light up a bit. I stared at it, longing to feel his arms around me.

Peter leaned across the table. "Alice. Go."

His words confused me. I looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"Alice, listen to me," he said. "I know you don't love me. I love you enough to know that. I know you love him."

"Peter, I…"

He put his hand on mine. "Go to Jasper, Alice. Tell him how you feel. He'll be lucky to have you."

And with that, he leaned forward more, and pressed a final kiss to my lips. I was stunned silent. I wasn't moving.

"Alice, _go_," he said, his voice getting louder. Other people turned to stare. I got up out of my seat and gave him a quick hug.

"Thank you," I whispered to him. He pressed the keys to his car into my hand.

"I'll stop by your place later to pick it up," he said. "I'll take a taxi home."

"No, Peter…"

"_Go._"

And, with that, I took the keys and left without another word or glance back.

Once on the road, I drove like a mad person. I didn't care that I didn't have my license with me, that it was at home. None of it mattered. All I cared about was getting to him.

I pulled into the Hales' driveway, parking sloppily. I couldn't help but run to the door. I knocked on it quickly. Jasper's mother opened the door and smiled.

"Alice!" she said, giving me a hug. "Come in, come in. It's freezing out. Oh, so good to see you! Bella and the girls are upstairs."

"Thanks, Claudia," I murmured, making my way past her as quickly as I could without seeming suspicious.

I was utterly thankful Jasper's room was the first one in the hall. I opened the door without knocking.

"Jasper, I need to talk…"

I was stunned into silence. Charlotte was with Jasper on his bed, her fingers knotted in his hair, leaning against his chest. Their lips were locked in a fierce kiss that almost sent me sobbing to my knees.

Jasper pulled away from her and locked eyes with me.

"Alice, I--"

"Forget it," I spat, tears filling in my eyes. I turned around and slammed the door before the tears could fall.

I stormed down the stairs, not caring what anyone thought. I wiped my eyes on my sleeve.

"Alice?" Claudia's concerned voice called.

"Alice, what the _hell_…"

"Alice, wait!"

"What's going on? Alice?"

Rosalie, Bella, Charlotte… all their voices mixed together, but I didn't hear any of it. I got in the car and left as quickly as I could manage.

Charlotte. Jasper. Charlotte. Jasper. I hated them both. Especially her. I hated her so much. I hated having to breathe the same air as her, having the same blood, and same height, the same family. I never wanted to see either of them again. Especially. _Her. _

I got to the house and ran upstairs, not even bothering to take off my coat in the entrance hall. I slammed the door when I got to my room, not caring that there was no one around to hear. I left Peter's keys on my bedside table before curling up on my mattress. I threw the stuffed animal Jasper had given me off my bed, and covered half my face with a pillow as I started to cry.

All of hell had just decided to invade perfection, and I was caught in the middle.


	18. Chapter 18

**Shit. Uhm. So. A lot of you have prolly already read this chapter because... I uploaded it to the wrong story last night. I dunno if the fact that I haven't slept since the night before the New Moon movie premiere is a good enough excuse. It's probably not... but still. Sorry, guys. I feel like an idiot right now. Never been so embarrassed over the Internet in my entire life. Dx uhm... I hope the people who reviewed this chapter on the other story still review this one. Thank you guys for being so cool about it, even though I'm not. Uhm... yeah. You guys are awesome(: love y'all.**

**Alice POV - Age 16**

I felt so stupid and alone.

What had I been thinking? Had I really thought it could work? I'd been an idiot; that much was apparent. Jasper never loved me, and somewhere deep inside me, I'd known that, even as I drove like a mad woman to his house expecting him to take me into his arms and never let me go.

The events of the night flashed past my eyes. I felt like a woman about to take her last breath before death overcame her, those last few seconds when her entire life went by her in one blink, before it all disappeared.

But my pain didn't disappear. It was all real, and it wasn't going anywhere. All I could think about was Charlotte's perfection, and the way their lips were crashed against each other. They were great together. An invisible force stabbed me in the chest with every word I thought and every memory I relived, even the happy ones.

I needed him. I needed Jasper. I needed to feel him next to me, to feel his arms around me, holding me close to him. I needed him to tell me he wanted me forever, not her.

It could've been easy. Why couldn't this have worked out normally? Developed a secret crush on him as a little girl, and escalated to more than an innocent crush? But, no. Nothing was every really that simple. This wasn't just a crush. This wasn't something I'd get over easily, or maybe even at all. I loved him. Not as the brother I'd always seen him as, but as everything. He was my everything. Everything was him.

But as I remembered Charlotte again, I knew he'd never return those feelings.

The night passed by slowly. I glanced at the clock a couple times that seemed hours apart, and had found that only six minutes had passed. I wanted the day to be over. I wanted to fall asleep so that I could wake in the morning and convince myself that it had all been a heinous nightmare.

I muffled my screams of pain and sobs with a pillow, biting into it.

I heard the front door open and close shortly before frantic footsteps pounded up the stairs. I contemplated standing long enough to lock the door, but I couldn't bring myself to get up.

Bella and Rosalie burst through the door. I saw a flicker of white blonde hair in the hallway. I was glad she wasn't going to enter the room. It was the smart thing to do. I wasn't sure how I'd react to seeing her.

I kept my eyes on Bella after realizing that looking at Rosalie when she bore so much resemblance to her brother hurt far too much.

Bella sat on the bed and pulled me so that I was sitting upright. She hugged me as I cried into her hair. Her chin was on top of my head.

"Aw, Alice," she said. "I'm sorry."

I hated how her trying to make me feel better actually made me cry harder. I was sobbing uncontrollably, and nothing could make it go away. My gasps for air between wails made my entire body shake.

"Alice, neither of us can believe it," Rosalie said. "We were so sure… we're sorry. This is partially our fault, we realize that. I hate myself right now, and you have no idea how angry my brother has me right now."

I didn't answer. I kept crying. Bella's hair was a mess with my tears, but she didn't even shift to pull it behind her shoulder.

"Charlotte isn't talking to us," Bella said. My heart gave an extra sharp squeeze at the mention of her that pumped angry blood through my veins. "She said she wouldn't say another word until we'd let her talk to you. I think she's upset at herself for hurting you. I think she understands now."

"But we didn't let her come in," Rose said. "I'm pissed as hell at her. The worst part is, I think she knew you loved him, and she went for it anyway."

I looked up just long enough to see her blue eyes burn with rage. Her blue eyes. They looked so much like his. Take away the delicately curled eyelashes and the thin lines of eyeliner, and they'd have been identical to his. I bit into the pillow again to keep from bawling more than I already did.

Within the comforting embraces of my friends, I gradually stopped crying. Once the tears had halted, I wished they'd come back. Without them, there was no way for me to let out the negative energy other than screaming, but I didn't want to stoop to that. The tears refused to start flowing again. I hopped off the bed, ran my fingers through my hair, and slipped into a pair of shoes and a jacket.

"Where are you going?" Bella asked.

"Out," I answered, afraid that it would come out as more of a squeak than an actual word. Thankfully, I was coherent enough for her to understand me.

"If Mom gets home, tell her I went to Angela's to study," I said, my voice cracking on the last word. I barely had time to see Bella's vacant, confused nod before I'd swept out of the room.

Peter had already come to pick up his car. Knowing Rose would be upset if I took hers, I had no choice but to take Bella's truck. I hated that filthy piece of scrap metal, but since Mom and Dad only had enough money to buy one of us a car for our sixteenth birthday, I'd insisted on waiting until I was seventeen and giving Bella the car of her dreams. Who'd have known the car of her dreams would have been a rusty, old, 1950's Chevy?

The engine roared to life, scaring the crap out of me. I shook off the shock and reversed out of the driveway. A look in the rearview mirror showed me Rosalie's car starting up and coming after me. I groaned. Come on, Rose, you don't need to follow me. I had a nagging suspicion she thought I was out to do something stupid. But I wasn't. I just needed to clear my head. _Alone_.

I went as fast I could in the ancient truck, trying to confuse Rosalie into going on a different path and leaving me in peace. Nothing I did worked. Sighing, I pulled into the parking lot of my destination: a coffee shop in the middle of no where.

I'd only been there a couple of times before, but I remembered how much I'd loved the atmosphere. I remembered all the college and high school kids sitting with laptops and steaming cups of coffee in large armchairs, the wooden tables and floor, the stone walls, the fireplace, the bar chairs. It was a place I'd felt cozy, and I was hoping after a few lattes and zero conversation I'd be able to think straight enough to figure out what I was going to do about… him.

But conversation seemed to be unavoidable, seeing as I hadn't even made it to the door of the café before Rosalie parked her car and stepped out. I saw a familiar swish of blonde hair as the car door closed.

It wasn't Rosalie at all. It was Charlotte, decked out in black and white and looking as though she'd just stepped off the set of a photo shoot for Teen Vogue.

"Alice!" she called, hurrying up to me. She was holding her sweater closed at the top and her high heels clanked against the cement. I ignored her and walked straight into the café, closing the door in her face.

It was warm enough inside that I was able to take off my sweater. I sat on one of the stools at the counter and pulled a menu from the pile in the corner. I flipped through it, not really reading any of it. I was too absorbed in my thoughts. When I looked up and outside the glass door, I saw Charlotte struggling with her heel that was stuck in a crack in the ground. Not even that was enough to make me smile.

A bored looking guy that looked no older than I came to ask me what I wanted. I glanced at the menu again and ordered the first choice under lattes.

"Um, pumpkin spice, please," I whispered.

He nodded. "Sure thing." Then he went into the back and placed the order. I rested my cheek on the countertop, folding my arms under my head.

I felt the gust of air from the door opening before I heard the clank of her heels against the marble floor. I heard her sit herself next to me. I didn't move.

"Alice," she said, touching my elbow with the tips of her fingers. I remained cold and indifferent. I'd always been the bubbly and optimistic one. I'd always known what was coming. But I didn't know anything today. I didn't know what was going to happen, and it frightened me. I'd never been clairvoyant, but at least I'd been able to have a glimpse of what the future held. That night, I knew nothing of what to expect.

"Alice, please talk to me," Charlotte's quiet voice said. The boy came back and placed a coffee cup next to my head.

"Thanks," I whispered to him, lifting my head only to take a sip. I avoided looking at her. I stared into my drink, imaging things in the whipped cream that weren't really there.

"Green tea, please, with two packets of sugar," I vaguely heard Charlotte say to the boy who went back to prepare her order.

"Alice, come on," she whined. "Please talk to me."

I snapped my head to the side so suddenly she jumped. I stared her in the eye. "Alright, I'm listening. What do you have to say?"

She stuttered incomprehensively. I couldn't even bring myself to be smug about the fact that I'd caught her speechless.

Charlotte stopped trying to form words and sighed, putting her hand on one of mine. For a moment, I didn't feel inferior to her. We were equal for once.

"I know how you feel about him," she said. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," I said coldly. "He chose you. You chose him. It's over and done with."

"No, Alice." She sipped her tea. "I chose him, but he didn't want me."

"Please," I scoffed. "Don't try to pull that."

"It's true!" she protested. Charlotte sighed. "I was supposed to go into his room only to ask if he had any idea where the scissors were. We needed them for our project. Once in there, I, well, I went for it."

"All the while knowing how I felt?"

She turned red, and nodded.

"I feel terrible, Alice," she said. "I'm not used to guys resisting me, and Jasper was so… _tempting_ to me. It was a pathetic crush that got me no where quick, and hurt you in the process. Alice, you're family. You and your parents and Bella took me in when I had no place to go. The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you. Every moment since I've been here, you've treated me so much better than I deserve, which is saying something, since you've been treating me kind of like crap."

But I wasn't quite ready to apologize for my treatment of her just yet. "So, you're saying that… you just attacked him? He doesn't…?"

Charlotte shook her head. "Alice, he never liked me. It's never been me. It's always been you." She took another sip of her tea. "I see the way you look at him, and the way he looks at you. You're his sun. His world revolves around you. I don't know what I was thinking when I kissed him." She shook her head, looking genuinely ashamed of herself. "I wasn't trying to change his mind. You two were made for each other, that much has been obvious to me since day one, and I would never want to get between that. I just… wasn't thinking."

And without a second thought, I leaned over to hug her. She stiffened, shocked at my sudden change in spirits, and then hugged me back. I pulled away and drank some of my latte, thinking.

"So… now what do I do?" I asked her stupidly.

Before she could answer, the door to the café opened, and I looked instinctively to see the person entering.

My breath hitched in my throat. My heart skipped a couple beats, then started pounding. My hands shook. My cheeks turned pink.

It was Jasper.

Charlotte smiled and finished off her tea.

"Thank me later," she said before leaving two dollars tip for the boy who took her order and leaving. She gave Jasper an apologetic smile as she left, but I could tell he didn't see her. All either of us was focusing on was the other. I smiled and hopped of my stool, closing the distance between the two of us.

When we were but inches away from each other, he pulled me against his chest. I looked up at him through my eyelashes, a small smile never leaving my lips.

"You've kept me waiting a long time," I said softly. He pulled back just enough to duck his head like a good, southern gentleman and bow slightly to me.

"I'm sorry, ma'am," he said, a smile playing at his lips.

I held out my hand, and he took it, noticeably without stopping to make sense of what he was doing.

We walked hand in hand outside into the darkness of the light. But I didn't see darkness. Everything shone with a new brilliancy, brighter than the day. He turned to stare me lovingly in the eyes. His hand stroked my cheek.

"My darling Alice," he whispered. I closed my eyes, leaning into his touch. He put one finger under my chin, tilting my head upwards and leaning in. His nose brushed against mine. "Because of you, I've felt hope."

And with not another word from either of us, he crushed his lips to mine in a tangle of passion and desire.

I was his as long as he wanted me, and, with any luck, that would mean forever.


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: I'M BAAAAACK :D Didya miss me? (; Yep. School got out on 6/23 so I have infinite time. That is, until I get that letter that tells me what books I have to read and the essays I have to write x_x But anyway. Yeah. Hope you guys like the chapter; & it feels totally good to be back.

**Alice POV - Age Seventeen**

The house was quiet when I got home. Bella was still out with Edward, Mom and Charlotte were out to watch some foreign film, Dad was working, driving some plane to Japan, and Jasper wasn't supposed to come see me for another half hour. Half an hour was long enough to take a shower to relieve some stress. Of course, Jasper was famous for being early, so I'd have to make it quick.

I went into the bathroom with clothes in my hand and locked the door, despite the fact that I was home alone. I just could never take a shower comfortably with the door open or unlocked. It's so… wrong.

I stepped under the hot, running water and felt immediately much better than I had earlier. The end of the school year meant tests, and lots of them. AP exams weren't particularly difficult for me, but they were still a pain. My English teacher expected me to be able to study, handle a part-time job, and write a twelve page paper by the end of the week. If that man wasn't on something, then the universe was obviously trying to fuck with me.

I stepped out of the shower with a towel wrapped around me. I squeezed the water out of my hair and walked across the hall to grab the blow dryer from my mother's dresser. Deciding it was too quiet, I turned the television on and returned to the bathroom. I brushed the few tangles out of my short hair, observing that it would soon be time for another trim. It was getting too long for my usual hairstyle.

I pulled on my pink sweats and black tank top. I grabbed my matching pink sweater off the door handle, deciding it was too cold to go without. I had no problem with Jasper seeing me in sweats, looking plain as can be with no makeup. He'd known me long enough that I didn't have to conform for him.

Jasper. My heart started beating faster just thinking about him as I put some blue gunk on the tips of my hair to help it spike out without the use of a flat iron. I turned on my blow dryer and turned my head upside down to dry the underside.

We'd been dating since that fateful night the year before. I loved him so much. He was the reason I no longer thought saying "I love you" before you were thirty was silly. Love truly knew no age; it only knew the people, and recognized which people deserved love. Jasper and I were two of the lucky ones. We were infinitely happy together. The incident with my cousin was far, far, _far_ behind us.

I was on good terms with Charlotte. After what happened with Jasper, her flirty side disappeared. I liked her much better now. She was really a sweet, charming girl. Of course, guys were all over her, but she didn't go around making out with whoever she could get her hands on or leading anyone on. She was still single; something I could not understand.

My hair was dry and spiked in its usual manner. I pulled on some socks to protect my feet from the cold, hardwood floor in the living room. I settled down onto the couch to watch the news while I waited for Jasper.

There was nothing particularly interesting being broadcast on the TV. A forest fire, some report about how teens are going to need surgery on their thumbs if the text messaging rate keeps rising. Boring.

I was just about to change the channel when the anchor announced some breaking news. The scene changed from inside the news studio to the outdoors, somewhere in New Jersey, where a news-person was standing with a microphone in his hand and an umbrella in his hand. There was an empty field filled with people, chaos, ambulances, cops, and firefighters.

"There has been a plane crash in a desert field near the border of New Jersey. The airline may not be disclosed at this time."

"Damn," I murmured. My eyes involuntarily flashed to a picture of my father on the mantle, wearing his pilot uniform. I didn't have much time to worry before the doorbell rang. I flew to answer it.

Jasper had a warm smile waiting for me. He was dressed as casually as I was; blue t-shirt, black pants. His hair was an organized mess. I stood on my tippy-toes and kissed him.

"You're positively handsome," I told him, sneakily taking in his scent. Honey and peppermints, as always.

"Of course I am," he said, smirking and kissing me again. "Because a stained t-shirt is totally sexy."

I laughed. "I didn't even say sexy," I said. "But, for the record, yes, I think it's very sexy."

"Well, then, are you going to let me in or are we just going to continue talking about how sexy I am in your doorway?"

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, come in." I closed the door behind him. "I was just watching the news. There was a really bad plane crash. It's the kind of thing that makes me think, you know? What with my dad being a pilot, and all…" I grimaced.

"You shouldn't be watching that," he said grimly. "You know how the news gets you. I'll change the channel."

I was about to let him, but I turned to the television and knocked the remote out of his hand.

"Wait," I said, staring intently at the TV. "Turn it up."

He obliged begrudgingly. I sat down next to Jasper on the couch.

"The plane, flying from Seattle, Washington to Tokyo, Japan, had two hundred and fifty passengers onboard. Six of them died in the crash, one of which was the pilot, Erik Brandon, a husband and father from Forks, Washington."

The world stopped spinning. My breath hitched in my throat. The tears started rushing before I could fully comprehend what I'd just heard.

Jasper's arms were around me, but, for the first time in my entire life, they did nothing to comfort me.

He was shaking. I was shaking. We were both shaking and crying and shaking and crying and I was screaming into his arm and he was biting back tears and I was sobbing into his shirt and nothing made sense and I wanted my mom and Bella and Charlotte and I didn't know what to do.

And my dad was dead.

And my world was broken.

Jasper held me tightly. I heard the front door open.

"Alice!" my mother called. "Are you here, hun?"

I stood up abruptly. Jasper mimicked my sudden movement. I walked to the front door. Mom was hanging her jacket on the coat rack. Charlotte was right behind her. Neither of them looked at me. I bit my lip as hard as I could.

"Do you know when Bella will be… Alice, why are you crying?"

Mom walked toward me. She looked from me to Jasper. I could feel her silently accusing him, as though she thought my tears were his fault. She had no idea how wrong she was. Her hand was on my arm.

"Alice?"

Charlotte stood near the door, taking in the scene, confused.

"Dad's dead," I said, wiping my face with the back of my hand. I was trying to be strong, trying to put on a face of no emotions. But as soon as I opened my mouth again, the tears refused to stop flowing. "His plane crashed in a field. Six people died. He was one of them."

Mom started shaking. Her hands moved slowly upward to cover her mouth. She shook her head and closed her eyes tightly. Tears welled out the corners of her eyes.

"No, no, no, no," she whispered. "No… no!"

Her voice got progressively louder. Jasper explained the situation to Charlotte. Both of them were crying, Charlotte slightly more. She'd already lost both of her parents, and now her uncle. I was too out of myself to feel bad for her.

My dad was dead.

_Dead._

I fell to my knees, cradling my head in my arms. My body shook violently as I sobbed. All I wanted to do was cry and scream, scream until there was no sound left in my body, cry until I drowned the world.

Jasper came to his knees beside me. His strong arms wrapped around me. I curled into him, feeling more vulnerable than I had in my entire life.

I wanted my daddy. But nothing I ever did would be able to bring him back.

**A/N: Sorry it was so short, and sorry for… well… yeah. Gimme ten reviews so I can write the next chapter (: Love you guyss !**


	20. Chapter 20

**Alice POV - Age Seventeen**

A month had passed, and nothing was getting any better.

Mom never left her room. Bella, Charlotte, and I were studying from home for a while, but Mom wouldn't let us keep her company. The only people she wanted to see were Esme and Claudia, but since Claudia's work got in the way, it was usually just Esme that came over early in the morning to spend the day with my mom.

It was hard for all of us to even be in the house. Every single room had been entirely designed by my father… we all had pictures of him in our bedrooms, and the living room was filled with family photos.

He was gone, but he was everywhere.

Bella and I were doing most of the planning for Dad's funeral. We had brave faces on for our mother during the day. When the florist asked what should the "showcase flower" be in the arrangements, I smiled and said sunflowers were his favorites. When the planner mentioned that she couldn't decide if she should show a certain picture of him at the ceremony, Bella laughed and said that he'd always hated that picture because it was taken just as he had recovered from a sneeze.

Those were the masks we wore during the day: smiles and laughter and "He wouldn't want us to be sad."

But, every night, Bella and I would go into his office, set down two pillows on the floor, snuggle up together under a blanket, and cry until we had no tears left.

My eyes were swollen red when I woke up the morning of his funeral. Beside me, Bella was still asleep. I pushed a strand of hair out of my sister's face and kissed her cheek. This was the first time I'd seen her asleep in four days. Her face was still wet with tears, though, so I knew she hadn't been asleep for long.

I stood up without waking her, deciding that she deserved a few more hours of sleep.

Charlotte was in the kitchen already, which didn't surprise me. I'd recently found out cooking was her method of keeping control of her emotions. I hadn't seen her cry since the night we'd heard the news, but I heard her sobbing whenever she didn't think we were in earshot.

She looked up from a covered pan on the stove when she heard me walk in. She smiled at me, but there were dark circles under her eyes. I didn't think she'd slept.

"Morning, Alice," she said, pulling out a chair for me at the table. "Want some food?"

I cringed internally. My appetite hadn't been as huge as usual lately. The smell of food repulsed me. Even drinking water made me nauseous. But, seeing Charlotte's wide eyes and hopeful smile made me nod my head.

"Great, alright," she said, then bustled off to get a plate ready. I downed a glass of water she set on the table, hoping my stomach wouldn't react poorly to the new intrusion.

She set a plate of food in front of me, then one for herself. She sat across from me, and immediately dug in. Her movements were jerking, quick. Her eyes were unnaturally wide and the fakest smile I had ever seen was painted on her face.

"Dig in, silly," she said, speaking as though I were an incompetent two year old. "The food's not going to just climb into your mouth!"

I picked up a fork hesitantly and brought a morsel to my mouth. The second it hit my tongue, I realized just how hungry I was. I finished off the food in a few minutes, ignoring the insane waves of nausea that swung over me. It was my first actual meal in a month, and all I could do was hope I wouldn't be throwing it up later.

Surprisingly, after another glass of water, the nausea settled, and I felt the relief of a full stomach. Charlotte wasn't halfway done with her plate. I noticed she was just picking at her food.

"Something wrong?" I asked her. She looked up at me, smiling at first, but then bit her lip and started to blink away tears.

"Wrong?" she said, her voice hysterical. "Wrong? Alice, your dad is…" She fanned her face as she tried to get the word to come out. She went on. "And you're asking _me _if I'm alright!"

I smiled sadly. "I'm worried about you, Charlotte," I told her. "You've been looking a bit… crazed lately."

"Worried!" she exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air. "Worried about me! Alice, good Lord, I'm worried about you! You don't have to be strong all the time, you know. I've been trying it, and I have absolutely no idea how you and Bella do it." She started shaking her head as the tears fell freely. "I try; I try _so hard _to be like you guys and put on a brave face for Auntie Marissa, but I just…" She sniffled. "I just _can't fucking do it._"

I placed my hand over hers and forced a smiled. If only she knew just how torn up I really was…

"Dad wouldn't have wanted us to be sad," I said, actually believing what I said for once. "He was such a happy man, so full of life. And he loved us. He loved me and Bella and you and Mom." The tears started coming, and Charlotte stared at me with red eyes. "He loved the Cullens and the Hales… He loved seeing Bella happy with Edward and me with Jasper; even loved seeing Rose and Emmet happy… Always wanted to see you happy. He loved all of us." I sobbed out my words. "He wouldn't" sniffle "have wanted us" sniffle "to be" sniffle "sad."

And there they were. The tears, the sobs, the convulsive shaking I'd been hiding around others for a month. They fall flew out of my body leaving no prisoners. I could tell Charlotte had no idea what to do, so she just sat there squeezing my hands and whispering words I couldn't hear.

My hands fluttered uselessly before I stood up. I wiped my face with the back of my hand, and the hard front was back.

"You should go get ready," I said, turning my back and walking toward the sink to hide my face. "I'll clean up and get all the leftovers in the fridge."

"Are you sure?" she said, hurrying over to me. She reached out, but pulled her hand in at the last second. "I can pick up; it's no trouble…"

"Go," I said. I didn't hear her move. I made my voice harsher. "_Go!_"

I heard her leave the room, and I moved to pick up the plates. I placed them next to me and turned on the sink.

I fell to my knees in tears before my hands touched the water.

-x-

I hated standing there. I was the closest one to his coffin, the closest one to the people sobbing beside his dead body.

It'd been hard to get my mother ready and out of the house. Esme, though would be out of work in time for the funeral, wasn't able to help us in the morning. Therefore, Charlotte, Bella, and I helped get Mom out of bed, dressed, and presentable. Charlotte drove us while Bella and I stayed in the backseat, each of us holding on to one of Mom's hands.

And now here she was, at the start of the family line, greeting people and accepting their condolences with a sad smile and dry eyes. I couldn't imagine how loud she was screaming on the inside.

Finally, the familiar faces started appearing. One by one, each of the Cullens came down the line. Edward gave Bella a kiss on the forehead as he passed her, and whispered something in her ear. She smiled sadly in return.

Emmett was the first one to get to me. He pulled me into one of his famous bear hugs.

"How you holding up, Alice?" he asked.

I shrugged. "As well as I can," I answered. I looked up sadly at him and he smiled half heartedly before continuing. I heard him hold in a breath as he passed my father, and as he walked toward the pews I noticed a single tear on his cheek. It was surreal seeing Emmett cry, but at the same time, it really helped drill into me the fact that this whole thing _was _real, and Dad wasn't just going to pop out from behind the door like he did when I was a little girl.

Edward followed close behind. He gave my hand a firm squeeze.

"Jasper should be coming soon," he whispered. "I saw their car parked outside."

I breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness," I said, more to myself. It just hit me how much I really needed him then. "Thanks, Edward."

Instead of looking to see Edward as he walked by the coffin, I kept my eyes on the door. I took hugs from Esme and Carlisle, and exchanged a few soft-spoken words I couldn't remember with people I didn't know.

If there was one person I needed to talk to now, that I could talk to, it was Jasper. I hadn't seen him since the last time he stopped by my house two weeks ago; hadn't heard him speak since I heard the voicemail he left while I was taking food up to my mom.

Just as Jessica passed me, I saw Rosalie emerging through the door, dressed in a knee length black dress with two fresh mascara tears painting her face.

Close behind her were her parents. I recognized the look on Auntie Claudia's face; she was trying not to cry. Uncle Richard was red faced and solemn; Dad had been his best friend.

Jasper entered, and the doors were closed. The Hales had been the last people we'd been expecting. As they made their way to where Bella, Mom, Charlotte, and I were standing, my eyes scanned the pews filled with people my father had met at least once in his lifetime. His regrettably short lifetime…

"Alice."

Jasper breathed my name softly and pulled me into his arms. We were the only two left at the front of the church. My family, the other Hales, and the Cullens were already sitting in the front row. Jazz took my hand as he took his favorite watch out of his pocket, the one my dad always admired, and placed it in the coffin along with the abundance of flowers and homemade cards. We took our seats at the edge of the aisle together. I threw a fleeting smile at Mom, who tried her hardest to return it.

Jasper kept his arm around me while people spoke about my father. I tried as hard as I could to keep everything in, but occasionally, a small whimper would escape my mouth. When this happened, I would feel him press his lips to my hair or his arm pull me closer to him.

It was hard to stay calm while my mother was speaking. It was even harder when Bella and I had to rush to bring her back to the seats when she collapsed after she finished talking.

"Bells, can you take Mom back?" I whispered to her. "I think I'd like to speak after all."

Bella stared at me in awe. We'd both agreed not to give speeches at the funeral. We both knew we couldn't handle it. She nodded and took a gulp of air.

"Good luck, Alice," she said. She put one hand on Mom's back to steady her and I hurried back to the podium. I locked eyes with Jasper, who smiled sadly at me and silently encouraged me. I took a deep breath.

"My father was the most amazing man I ever knew," I said. "He was brave, caring, and never failed to put his family before everything else. He took care of my sister, my mother, and me as well as any human being was physically able to. He even took care of his friends who, in his eyes, were just a different branch of his family."

I looked down at my hands and bit down on my bottom lip.

"I try to imagine what he'd say to me if he were here," I said. I wasn't talking to the crowd anymore. I was talking to myself, and somehow, that made it so much harder to get the words out.

"Probably something along the lines of, 'Alice, how could you pair that dress with those shoes? Honestly, I know you have better sense than that!'" I laughed to myself, a sad sort of laugh. My ears blocked out all other noises, so I had no idea what kind of reaction my words were having on the people in front of me. "He always tried to make me smile, whether by teasing me, telling me a joke, or simply just… being there. His presence alone was enough to brighten my mood.

"I don't like to think that he's gone, even though I know he is. He would want me to be practical enough to at least admit that to myself. But I do like to think that he's still watching me, making sure I don't get into any trouble and that I always paint my nails to match my shoes." I looked down at my nails; they were a shade of blue that matched my heels exactly. "Yeah, he always did like it when I matched the two littlest parts of my outfit."

I looked up, past the ceiling, past everything I could see. I didn't know where my dad was, so I spoke to the universe, hoping that somehow my words would get to him.

"Dad," I said, my voice shaking. "I feel bad for all the people who never had fathers as wonderful as you. I wish I could hug you one more time, but since I know I can't…" A tear fell from each of my eyes, and I wrapped my arms around myself as though it would keep me in one piece. "I just want you to know that I love you. So much. And even though you won't physically be there at my high school graduation, or my wedding, or to see my kids grow up… You'll always have a place in my house and my heart, that you can occupy whenever you want, whether it be to take care of me or Mom or Bella or anyone else. I miss you already, Dad."

My voice dropped to a whisper, so low I could barely hear myself. "I wish you didn't have to leave me."

I walked away from the podium. I touched Jasper's hand briefly before continuing down the aisle and out the door of the large church. I didn't want to stick around in the room to see the reaction people had. I didn't want to see them cry anymore. I didn't want to be so close to my father's dead body.

There was a garden just outside, planted as a memorial to Lady Something-or-other. I curled up on the bench that sat amidst all the flowers and plant life, frustrated to find that I couldn't make myself cry.

"Why did you have to leave me?" I whispered into my knees. The still air produced a light breeze that caressed my face in a soothing manner, then went back to its previous state.

The lovely coincidence made my smile despite everything else. If I closed my eyes, I could almost imagine it was my father, patting my cheek the way he always did to cheer me up.

"And so she smiles."

I opened my eyes. Mom was standing at the edge of the garden, evidence of fresh tears painted on her face, but with a smile that was obviously genuine.

I pulled my knees in closer to my chest to make room. She sat down next to me, and pulled my legs down so that they rested over her knees. She tugged at my shoelace subconsciously.

"I should've given this to you earlier today," she said. "But I haven't been thinking straight lately. I'm just glad I remembered to bring it to give it to you now."

She pulled a small, black box out of the pocket of her coat and handed it to me.

"I was going to give Bella's hers at the same time," she said, "but I decided giving it to the both of you individually might be better."

I ran my fingertips over the smooth velveteen box before opening it. There was a necklace inside, silver and heart shaped. A locket. I pried it open with my nonexistent fingernails.

Inside were two pictures; one of Bella and Mom, and one of him and me. I remembered the pictures. They were taken on our seventh birthdays, in the few moments our parents managed to pry us away from our little friends.

"He bought these for the two of you when he found out I was pregnant with twins," Mom told me, patting her stomach. "He'd been so excited… He meant to give them to the two of you himself on your eighteenth birthdays, or the day you moved out. He hadn't decided which yet." She chuckled. "So indecisive, your father. Always had such a hard time deciding which choice was perfect."

"Why are you giving this to me now?"

"I want you to remember that your father did not leave you," she answered. "He did not leave you, or me, or Bella. He's still here, still with us. He'll never truly be gone, not as long as he still exists at least in our memories."

I blinked away every single tear that suddenly overwhelmed me. What had I said to Charlotte when I first met her?

_You can shed tears because they're gone, or smile because they lived._

I had the same two options.

I could either spend the rest of my life sad because I'd lost my father, or I could be happy for the fact that, although he had so much living left to do, he lived a great life, full of happiness and love.

I fastened the necklace on and took my mother's hand. People were filing out into our view, now. I could see Rose, Jasper, Bella, Edward, and Emmett huddled together, their eyes scanning the premises. I also caught side of Charlotte talking, laughing, and smiling with Peter. Now _there _was a brilliant idea!

"Go with your friends and your sister," Mom said. "I think I'm going to go back inside. I'd like to speak with him alone, now that the place is empty."

She pressed a kiss to my forehead and left. All I saw was her skirt billowing behind her as she passed a pillar, and then she was gone. Her undying love for my dad would forever give me hope.

Rose was the first to catch sight of me. "Alice!" she called, waving at me. "Alice!"

I stood from the bench and practically ran to them, the tips of my feet barely touching the ground. The familiar breeze engulfed me again as I reached them, but it was only mine and Bella's hair that rustled in the wind.

Bella and I, surprisingly, didn't need comforting. After I'd left, she'd stood up to speak, as well, ignoring her shyness and letting her love for Dad overpower it. We both felt better. We'd both said goodbye while still acknowledging that he wasn't really gone.

_Dad, wherever you are, I love you. We'll always be together._


	21. Chapter 21

**Alice POV - Age 18**

"How much longer, Alice?" Mom called from downstairs. "You don't need to take everything you own with you, you know!"

"Just two more, Mom!" I said back. "I swear, I'm almost done."

I zipped up the final suitcase, then stood up to assess my surroundings. The room I'd grown up and many so many memories in was nearly empty. An empty bed frame, a bare vanity, an empty dresser, and a couple of boxes filled with childhood clothes and toys were the only occupants.

Bella swung into my room. "Alice, come on. The plane isn't going to wait for you. Rose is already here, the boys are waiting in the car, and Mom had to do the airport check in online so that we don't waste any more time when we get there."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I said, picking up my suitcase and carry-on bag. "There. I'm ready."

Bella smirked. "Alright. I'll go let Mom know."

She disappeared from the doorway. I made no move to follow her.

Seeing my childhood room so empty made me want to cry. I looked at myself in the mirror that hung in the hallway. It was so strange. I could still remember being so small I couldn't reach the doorknob; remember fitting inside toy boxes and playing with Pixie. I kept her collar all those years; it hung from the handle of my suitcase.

I remembered the first day I stepped into the room after my dad repainted it. It had been such a magical experience; no more sharing a room with Bella! My room was the first thing I'd ever had that was all my own. The painted walls always reminded me of Dad, and all the hard work he put into it. I touched my necklace.

_Oh, Dad, _I said silently, _how I wish you could be here now._

Even though my windows were closed, the familiar breeze ran through my hair.

"Love you, too," I whispered.

"Dammit, Alice!" It was Rosalie's voice that whined from downstairs. "We have to go! _Vamonos_!"

I picked my last two bags up off the floor and dragged them out of my room. Standing at the top of the stairs, I grinned at Rose.

"Who are you, Dora the Explorer?" I teased. She tapped her watch.

"Tick-tock," she said loudly. "We're gonna leave without you."

I hauled my bags down the stairs and out the door handing them to Jasper so he could put them in the trunk of my car. _My _car. Mom bought it as an eighteenth birthday present. Finally, no more driving around in Bella's crap-mobile. I had a wonderful, beautiful, shiny Yellow Porsche. _And it was all mi - _

My thought process was interrupted by a pair of warm lips pressing against mine. Jasper pressed my back against the car, his hand finding my hair. My arms instinctively lifted to wrap around his neck. We fit together flawlessly, even despite the major difference in height. His other hand pressed against the window my car…

I pulled away. "_What did I say about putting hands on the car_?"

"Oh my God, Alice," he chuckled. "Really?"

"Yes, really," I said, crossing my arms. "Hand. Off. Car."

He took two steps back, holding both his hands above his head like he was being arrested. "Alright, alright," he said. "This better?"

"Much," I said, stretching up onto the tips of my toes to peck his cheek. "Are you sure you have to go to school in New Jersey? Can't you just settle for New York like us girls?" Well, most of us girls. Charlotte chose to go to Ole Miss to be close to Peter; they were engaged just out of high school, but were waiting until college was over and Peter was the successful whatever-he-wanted-to-be to get married. I chuckled inwardly at the heart attack _that _news almost gave my mother.

He ran his fingers through my hair. "Alice, Princeton is an hour and a half away from where you, Bella, and my sister are going to live," he reminded me. "Besides, at least the three of you were able to get off-campus housing. Edward's going to school in New Hampshire, and Emmett's gonna be all the way in California. I'm going to have to share a dorm with someone I don't even _know_."

"That's what you get for going for an Ivy League," I teased, sticking my tongue out.

"You're so judgmental," he joked.

"Oh, no, I'm just messing with you, Jazz," I with wide eyes. "I'm so proud of you, you know that."

He pressed his lips to my forehead. "I know."

"Alice, we need to get going soon," Bella said, jogging clumsily up to me. "Let's go say bye to Mom."

I smiled fleetingly at Jasper before following Bella up the stairs leading to our front door. When would be the next time I'd go up these steps? I couldn't be sure.

"Alright, Mom," Bella said. "It's about time for us to leave. Our cars will arrive within the next few weeks, right?"

"Oh, yes," Mom answered. "You all are _so _lucky Jessica's father owns a car shipping business and was willing to send all both yours and the boys' cars - not to mention Jasper's motorcycle -so far for a fraction of the price."

Bella and I smiled. It was silent for a few moments.

"My girls," Mom said finally, already crying, pulling us both into a hug. "My wonderful, beautiful girls."

"Momma," I crooned, rubbing her back. I could feel Bella squeeze her tighter.

"My girls," she said again. I could feel her tears soaking through my shirt. "Your father would have been so proud."

Mom looked up just a bit, moving us so that she could pull Rosalie in as well.

"I love you three so much," Mom said. "So, so much."

"We love you, too, Auntie Marissa," Rosalie said, running her fingers through my mom's hair.

"Yeah, Mom," Bella added. "We love you. Don't feel bad."

At first, Mom was the only one who would be able to go with us to the airport. Carlisle couldn't; he had a surgery to perform. Esme couldn't; she had a meeting with a potential customer. Auntie Claudia and Uncle Richard couldn't; their flight home was delayed indefinitely because of bad weather. And, now, Mom was being rushed off to some city I couldn't remember the name of for a crucial gathering that would determine whether or not she would keep her job. We couldn't take her away from that.

"I wish I could be there to see you girls off," she said. "To just have more time with you, if only an hour…"

"You act like we'll never see you again," I joked lightly. "We're coming home for Christmas; promise."

"Only a few short months away," Rosalie said.

"You girls have to get going," Mom said, finally letting us go. I only realized just how tightly she'd been holding us when I had to take a few large gasps to get my breathing back to normal.

Someone, most likely Edward, honked from outside.

"We'll miss you, Mom," I said. "We'll call you when the plane lands."

The three of us took turns leaving a kiss on her cheek. She followed us out to the front of the house, standing in front of the door as we loaded into my Porsche. The guys were already in Rosalie's BMW, where the bags that wouldn't fit in my car were; I was still surprised she let them touch it.

I got into the driver's seat, Bella in passenger, and Rose in the back. My mom's tears glistened in the sunlight. She waved, and the three of us waved back. I pressed down on the gas, averting my eyes so that no one could tell just how badly I wanted to cry.

Bella, however, was shamelessly sobbing beside me. Rose, who always refused to wear her seatbelt, scooted forward enough to be able to pat Bella's back.

"Come on, Bells," she said. "It's not really goodbye, is it? You'll see your mom again, and this town. It's just kind of a new beginning, right? A new place, new people, new atmospheric qualities."

I laughed. "Do you have any idea what you're even saying, Rose?"

"Of course I do," she said haughtily, sitting back and crossing her legs. "When _don't _I?"

I nodded as though she had a point and raised my bottle of water. "Well, then, a toast to new _atmospheric qualities_."

Rose laughed, and even Bella managed a small chuckle through her tears; both of them held up their own water, bumping it against mine and taking a swig.

I opened the window, letting the rare still Forks air turn to breeze, and the feel of my dad rustle through the car and taking away every fear we had of this new beginning.

"We're gonna miss our plane," Rose grumbled as we hurried through the airport. We'd gotten lucky; Emmett had a friend here who was able to get us to the front of the line to check in our bags. However, none of us knew the airport's new layout well at _all, _so finding our gate was proving to be the biggest challenge.

"Gate nine, gate nine," Rosalie was muttering under her breath. "Where the hell - "

"Gate nine!" Bella said suddenly, stopping in her tracks and pointing at a large sign. She pulled her cell phone out of her pocket to check the time. "Alright. We _really _need to get going. The plane leaves in just under twenty minutes."

Rose was the first to react. Completely disregarding that there were very young children around, she wound her fingers into Emmett's hair, pulling his lips onto hers as though they were alone. I averted my eyes.

"You'll come see me, right?" I said immediately to Jasper, a hopeful edge painting my voice. We hadn't really talked about what we'd do apart, even if we weren't so far away from each other. He pulled me against him, rubbing my back comfortingly.

"You know I will," he muttered against my hair.

"When do you have to leave?"

"Not for another week," he answered. I looked at him, my eyes as wide as I could make them, trying to memorize everything about him that wasn't already burned into my mind. "Call me when your plane lands, so I can make sure you got there alright."

"I'll be fine," I assured him seriously. Neither of us had been on a plane since my dad… The event had us traumatized. I wasn't looking forward to the flight, especially since our seats were in the back row, furthest away from an emergency exit.

"Be careful, Alice," he said, his lips sweeping across my forehead.

"I will," I promised. "I love you."

He pressed his lips ever so slightly to mine. "I love you, too. I'll see you soon, Alice."

I smiled halfheartedly. "Miss you already."

He grinned. "Miss you more."

Bella tugged at my arm. "We have to go," she said.

And with a few more fleeting goodbyes to our three favorite boys, we were off.

The final check went by in a blur. I could barely even remember taking off my shoes or putting them back on. I took my carryon bag from the conveyer belt as it came out of the x-ray check and slung it over my shoulder. We barely had time to stop and purchase magazines and snacks for the long flight before we heard the final boarding call over the intercom.

Once on the plane, there was a huge debate over who would take the window seat. I didn't want it; the window was a pain in the ass to sleep against. Bella argued that she wouldn't be able to stay calm if she was so close to "fragile glass, outside of which is an endless sky of doom!" Uh. Sure. Whatever.

Rosalie's excuse was that she felt safer in the middle. In the end, it was decided Bella's reasoning was the least valid, and, therefore, she took the window seat. Rose was in the middle, I was on the end.

I pulled my phone out to send a quick message to my mom before the plane took off and electronics had to be shut down.

_On the plane now. Should be taking off in a few minutes. Love you, call you when we get there._

I hit send. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Bella presumably doing the same thing. Next to me, Rose had just snapped her phone shut angrily, her cheeks red. She beat her head against the back of the seat.

"Do I want to know?" I asked her as Bella put her headphones into place. We wouldn't be hearing from her for the rest of the trip.

With her eyes closed, Rose groaned. "Two words," she said. "Royce King." She held up one finger for his first and last name.

I grimaced. Royce King. His father owned a bank in Forks, and he was exactly the kind of guy Rose's parents wanted her to be with. They knew his parents from somewhere, and it would have been their dream come true to see their perfect daughter with the Kings' perfect son.

Of course, Rose's parents loved Emmett. I mean, who didn't, right? And they loved the Cullens. But they didn't think Emmett was _mature _or _serious about his future _enough to be with their daughter. I'd never forget just how angry Rose was when her mother had told her that. Since Rose and Emmett had started dating, her parents had tried pathetically hard to get her to leave him for Royce.

But that would never happen. Royce was a pig; every girl in Forks knew it. Even his good looks weren't enough to make up for that. I heard he'd try to get a thirteen year old into bed. Normally, I didn't believe rumors, but the sick way he smiled when he was confronted about it made me think it was anything but a lie.

And, of course, it just so happened that no one wanted Rosalie and Royce together more than Royce himself. Rose, however, was completely disgusted by him and totally in love with Emmett. Thank goodness. I would never forgive her if she got with him.

"Don't tell me…"

"He's attending the School of Music," she groaned. "_And his off campus housing is in Manhattan._"

"How close to us?"

She held up her hand. "Six blocks."

"You don't think your parents…?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. The flight attendant informed us that the plane would be taking off shortly, and told us to make sure any electronics were shut off. I powered down my cell phone. "They don't try this hard. And it's not _his _parents, because I heard them telling Mom they wanted him close to home. Nope; this was all his doing."

"He's such a psychopath," I murmured. "He can't be mentally stable. Does he even want to study music?"

Rose nodded stiffly. "Unfortunately," she said. "Mom said he's been playing violin and clarinet since he was five or something. She says it's _one of the many things we have in common_. Please."

I pursed my lips. She loved music, and, apparently, so did he, but that wasn't something to build a relationship off of; not when a certain someone just happens to be an inconsiderate jackass.

"Don't let it get to you," I advised. "If he's gonna be a creep, let him be a creep, but don't let it get in your way. You're better than that."

"Of course I am," she said. "I know that. And he definitely won't be getting in my way, I'll make sure. It just bugs me that he's willing to take it to this level. It's sick."

I shrugged, but couldn't think of anything else to say, so I contented myself by pulling a magazine from my carryon bag as the plane lurched forward, commencing its ascent.

I went through one magazine, then another, then another, and another. Soon, I'd read the entire stack, and we still had another three hours to go. I pulled a pen from my bag and contented myself by drawing mustaches and facial hair on celebrities I didn't like.

I wasn't sure when it was that I fell asleep, but when I opened my eyes, people around me were standing up and crowding together, trying to maneuver their arms out of the tight space to reach up and grab carryon bags from the overhead compartments. I rubbed my eyes.

Unbuckling my seatbelt, I looked over to see Rose and Bella still asleep. I pulled out Bella's earplugs and shook Rosalie with as much force as I could manage. The two awoke, scared and disoriented. I chuckled and pulled my bag out from under the seat in front of me.

"Ready?" I asked them. Rose was still yawning and rubbing away the sleepiness from her eyes.

"Mhm," she managed softly. She looked to Bella. "Got your bag?"

"Yep," she said. "Let's go."

The plane was nearly empty as we filed out. I was grateful for the coolness of the airport. My shirt was sticking to my back with sweat from the stuffy plane.

Rose, Bella, and I stood and waited for our baggage. As Bella ran to get her red duffle bag as it quickly passed by her, my eyes wandered to the top of the exit doors. A large sign grinned down on us reading JFK INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT.

It took a long time to get all of our bags. Rose was sure she'd missed one of hers at least twice before she actually got it. I urged them to move faster and stay more alert so that their luggage wouldn't keep passing them. I wanted so badly to get going already.

Once I'd gotten the last of my bags and Bella and Rose were still waiting for theirs, I decided to take the time to sit down and call my mom to let her know we'd landed.

I dialed her number, but the call went straight to voicemail. I sighed and left her a message telling her we were all safe and sound in the airport and that we'd be catching a cab to the apartment within the next half hour. I blew her a kiss over the phone and, after telling her to call me back whenever she could, I hung up. Rose was chasing after her Barbie suitcase as it passed on the conveyer belt. I shook my head in amusement.

"Alright, we're ready to go," Bella said to me. I set my smaller bag atop my suitcase and started toward the exit.

It was hell waiting for a taxi. Everyone needed a cab, and everyone seemed to beat us to the empty ones. My phone vibrated in my hand.

"Mom?" I said immediately, holding the phone to my ear. A familiar chuckle greeted me.

"Not quite."

"Oops! Sorry, Jazz," I said as Rose finally managed to get a taxi driver to pull up to us. He helped us put our bags in the trunk.

"I take it your plane has landed, then?"

"Mhm," I muttered, fumbling to get my last bag into the cab. "We're just barely leaving the airport. I meant to call you soon, it's just - "

"It's fine," he assured me as I slid into the backseat after Bella. I pulled the slip of paper with our new address on it out of my pocket.

"1440 York Avenue," I said to the driver. He gave me a thumbs up and put the car into drive. Beside me, both Bella and Rose were pulling out their phones.

"How's the city?" he asked me. I peered out the window.

"Crowded," I answered. "Really crowded. Smoggy, too. The buildings are so tall, it looks like there isn't even a sky here." I laughed. "I think it's beautiful."

"I bet it is," he said sincerely. I curled into the seat, closing my eyes and imagining he was there to experience the overwhelming sensation of moving into the Big Apple with me. "It's hard to think about having to be away from you for so long, Alice. It's always been so easy growing up. You were always there; I could always keep you safe."

"Things have to change sometime." I smiled. "Besides, this will only make things more exciting when we do see each other again. When will that be, again?" I tacked on innocently. He chuckled.

"I'll head over within a week after I get to New Jersey," he said. "Promise."

"Alright," I said, puckering my lips. Two weeks without him. How did I ever survive when he was in Texas? "I'll see you then. Hopefully I'll have some crazy story to tell you in two weeks."

"But not too crazy," he teased. "No sneaking into clubs or anything. You're still only eighteen. Got it?"

I giggled. "Got it." I drew out my words. "No clubs, no bars, no jumping into people's vans. I can handle that."

"I'm not so sure you can." I could almost see the smirk on his face. I yawned. That nap on the plane hadn't been enough to make up for the fifteen minutes of sleep I'd gotten the night before.

"You're tired," he acknowledged. "Take a nap. With the traffic over there, I'm sure you'll have some time to sleep before you guys get there."

I rubbed at my eyes. "Good thinking, mister," I mumbled. "I'll call you later, okay?"

"Okay."

"Oh, and, Jasper?"

"Mm?"

"I love you."

I could tell when he was smiling, even if it was over the phone, and I always knew exactly which kind of smile it was. "I love you, too." This one was simple; very slight, just enough to make the corner of his mouth turn upward and his eyes to shine. It was my favorite.

"Bye, Jazz."

"Bye, Alice."

I tried my hardest to keep my eyes open. Even in stopped traffic, I couldn't run out of things to stare at. I wanted every detail to be burned into my memory. I memorized every building, every grey cloud of smog, every outfit on every billboard…

My eyes drifted closed and my head lolled to the side, coming to rest on Rose's shoulder. I heard her snigger, then move slightly to make me more comfortable.

"Wake you up when we get there," she whispered.

I was fast asleep before the last word escaped her lips.


	22. Chapter 22

_**Two months later…**_

"Happy Thanksgiving, Alice!"

Bella's voice was the first thing to greet me when I walked into the living room after waking up. She waved at me from the couch, where her legs were propped up on Edward's lap and her head was turned toward the TV. Edward flashed me a smile.

"Good morning," he said. "Or, good afternoon, I should say. Sleep well?"

"Not particularly," I said, taking a seat by him. "It's my week to sleep on the mattress pad, remember?" Our small apartment had room for two beds, neither of which was made for a full-size human being. We invested in a mattress pad so we'd never have to sleep on the hardwood floor, and rotated the bed schedule every week.

Bella laughed. "He just likes hearing you say it. Besides, you're not worse off than him and Jasper. Emmett has dibs on the couch for the week so they get the floor and a couple of blankets."

"That's what you get for not going to see your parents for Thanksgiving," I teased.

"I couldn't afford the ticket," Edward said.

"Carlisle offered to pay for it."

"I'm living on my own now." That was his favorite argument. "I don't like to accept money from them unless I absolutely need it. Besides, spending the week here isn't all bad. It's kind of like living in a shoebox, but you can't beat the company."

"And it's got a great view," Bella added. I looked over my shoulder at the enormous window that took up most of the back wall of our apartment. The view was definitely the best part of living in the city. Bella, Rose, and I spent many all-nighters drinking coffee in front of that window, waiting for the sun to rise over the skyline.

"Speaking of company," I said, "where's the rest of our club?"

"Rose took the boys to the grocery store to pick up some last minute things for dinner," Edward answered. "She needed the man-power to help carry bags. I volunteered to stay behind and protect you two from harm."

"I think a locked door usually does the trick for that, Edward," Bella laughed.

"They walked to the grocery store?" I asked. "It's freezing out!"

"You know Rose likes the scenery," Bella said. "New York in the snow is gorgeous."

"Yeah, from a window," I said. "She's insane."

"_You're_ insane, cooped up in here when it's so beautiful outside," Rose's voice called from the front door. "We're back!"

I could hear the click of her heels approaching the living room. Typical Rose. No weather conditions are severe enough to make her choose flats over platforms. I understood her love for heels, I really did. My Louboutins was as precious to me as it would be to any other girl, but in snow? Thanks, but I'd rather take the Payless boots out of hibernation for that.

"G'morning girls," Emmett said, tipping his head to Belle and me before piling the bags he was carrying on our kitchen table. He kissed Rose on the cheek and began shedding his many layers of shirts, sweaters, and jackets.

"Morning, Em," Bella said. I stood from my seat on the couch.

"Need any help?" I asked as Emmett turned his attention back to the groceries.

"Sure thing," he said, pushing half of the bags toward me.

"Where's Jasper?" I asked.

"Right here, darlin'." I felt the familiar pair of arms close around my waist. I turned my head to the side and gave him a quick peck on the lips. He shook the snow off of his hair and clothes.

"Not in the house, Jazz," I whined. "That's a new rug!"

"A little snow won't kill you," he teased. He kissed my cheek and began unloading his share of the grocery bags. Rose busied herself in the kitchen, marinating our turkey.

"Rose, did you really have to buy out the grocery store?" I asked as my pile of bags didn't seem to be getting any smaller.

"It's our first Thanksgiving away from home!" she answered eagerly. "I want it to be special. My mom compiled a huge list of her, Esme, and your mom's best recipes for me. I couldn't let it go to waste."

"Since when do you even cook, Rose?" Bella asked, giving up her seat on the couch to help with the bags. "You haven't even made yourself lunch since we've been here."

"Who do you think baked the holiday pies every year back home?" Rose said, rolling her eyes. "I can cook, I just prefer not to on a day-to-day basis. Make sure you leave all the Thanksgiving stuff on the counter. Potatoes, stuffing; all of that."

We did as we were told and were then ushered away from the kitchen so we wouldn't spoil anything. Bella, Edward, and Emmett took over the couch and TV. I took a game of checkers off a shelf and set it up for Jasper and me to play.

"Aw, shit," Rose groaned from the kitchen. "I forgot the stupid cranberry sauce. I'll just run to the store and get them."

I looked out the window. The snow was picking up. "At least take my car this time," I insisted. "It's getting pretty bad out there."

"Don't be silly." She waved me off. "It's just a few blocks down."

"Take a pair of my boots, then," I said, standing to go find her a pair as she put her coat back on.

She laughed. "Yeah, I'll just fit my sasquatch feet into your little pixie shoes. That makes sense."

"Take some of mine, then," Bella said. "We're the same size."

Rose rolled her eyes and, with a look as if she was about to go through some kind of brutal torture, exchanged her Chanel heels for Bella's favorite pair of six dollar boots. She grabbed her scarf and stomped toward the door.

"Someone baste the turkey if the timer goes off before I'm gone, okay?" she called back to us. "I left everything in plain sight."

"Got it!" Emmett said. "You sure you don't want me to go with you?"

"I can handle myself, Em," Rose assured him. "It's just cranberry sauce. I think I can manage. Love you!"

"Love you, too," Emmett replied, uneasily.

"Don't worry, seriously," I said when the door closed, taking two of Jasper's pieces in the game. "Rose is always going out into the city by herself. She'll be fine."

Emmett grimaced, but returned his gaze to the TV. I turned back to the game to find Jasper trying to take one of my pieces off the board.

"Caught ya." I smirked and ruffled his hair.

"Alice," he groaned, trying to fix it. I put my piece back where it belonged and blew him a kiss. He chuckled.

Time seemed to pass very slowly then. Bella had the channel switched to a marathon of a show she liked, and because I paid little attention to it, the same episode seemed to stretch out over at least a five-episode period of time. The timer went off on the turkey, and Edward got out of his seat to baste it. He pushed it back into the oven when he was done, and reset the timer. He walked back to the couch with his steps synced to the tick, tick, tick of the timer.

New York was always dark in the winter, no matter what time of day it was. That, coupled with the lack of clocks in our apartment and my cell phone in my room, made it hard to judge the time. Jasper and I were into our third checker game.

"It's probably time to start getting ready," I said to him. "Wanna help me pick out clothes?"

He smiled. "You never take my opinion into account."

"I know," I said, wiping our pieces off the board and into the box. "I just like your face every time I take off my shirt to try something else on."

He rolled his eyes, but stood up. I smirked.

"We'll be in the bedroom," I announced to the three unresponsive bodies on the couch. Bella was reading a book then, and Edward and Emmett were watching CSI. There was no distracting them.

Picking out clothes was always a huge ordeal for me, especially on special occasions like holidays. Pants and a blouse? A dress? Maybe a skirt and a blouse? The possibilities were endless.

Jasper sat on one of the bed - Bella's, for the week - and watched me attentively as I threw open the closet. It was a walk-in, and would definitely fit another bed if we chose to convert it into a second room. The possibility had been brought up, but, between the three of us (mostly Rose and I), we just had too many clothes.

"How about this?" I said, immediately going for a striped black and white top. "I could pair it with…" I reached into the bottom row of hangers. "…this skirt!" I held the outfit up to my body and let Jasper see.

"I rather like it," he said. "Maybe if I could see it on?" He raised his eyebrow.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes, even though this generally was the part I liked best about picking clothes with him. I pulled off my shirt first, then my sweatpants. Hearing his quick intake of breath made my movements to try on the outfit very slow. I smirked. Jasper and I didn't have a very sexual relationship, and we liked it that way, but moments like these were welcome, especially when we only had a week together after two months of being apart.

"Zip up my skirt?" I asked. He nodded, that wonderful smile playing at his lips. I arched my back a bit more than usual as he scooted toward the edge of the bed to zip me up.

His fingers didn't go straight to my zipper. They lingered at my hips, my thighs. His hand brushed the curve of my back before I heard the zipper go up. I turned around to face him.

"How does it look?" I asked.

He stood up and pulled me toward him with one hand firmly on my hip. His other hand found the back of my neck, and his thumb brushed the side of my cheek. I felt chills go up my back.

"Stunning," he said, his lips close to my ear. "You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

I pushed him back onto the bed and my lips found his. Two months of loving and missing him flooded out as I locked my arms around his neck to bring him closer to me. His fingers stroked and pulled on my hair and I realized that I'd really forgotten how much I loved kissing him, and how our bodies molded into one another.

We broke apart, but I wanted nothing more than to keep going. He brushed his lips ever so lightly against my cheek.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you, too," I sighed. "And… I should really finish getting ready."

He smiled and helped me off of him. He took his seat back on the edge of the bed and I started back into my closet.

"So you really like it?" I asked, fumbling with the high waist of the skirt in the mirror.

"I do," he said. "Definitely."

I smiled at my reflection. "Me too. It's not often I like the first outfit I try on, but I think this works. Hey, check the time for me, yeah?" I asked. Rose had been gone for about an hour, so she'd probably be back soon, and that only gave me so much time for my hair and makeup. I pulled a pair of soft gold, glitter-covered heels from a shelf.

"Um…" Jasper reached for my phone. "6:45."

"6:45?" I asked, stunned. "Are you sure?"

He double checked on his phone. "Yeah, I'm sure. What time did Rose leave, anyway?"

"Around two, I think," I said. "No more than an hour and a half after I woke up."

I put my hands on my hips. Really? She'd been gone for almost five hours? I couldn't be. I walked back into the living room.

"Hey, nice outfit, Alice," Bella said. "Love the heels. Do they come with life insurance? Let me know, so I can collect it when you trip and fall to your death."

I scrunched up my face toward her, then turned to Emmett. "How many episodes of CSI have gone by since Rose left?"

Emmett turned to Edward. "Four, I think," Edward said.

"Does it take four hours to go to the grocery store?" Bella asked, putting her book down.

"Not usually," I responded. "Has Rose called any of you?"

My question was met with several nos. I bit my lip.

"Jasper, can you call her?" I asked. When I turned to him, he was already dialing.

"She's a big girl," Edward said, his voice anything but reassuring. "She probably got into a fight with the store clerk over the price of her cranberry sauce."

"Yeah, or, there's that huge shoe store right across the street, remember?" Bella's voice was shaking. "They have sales all the time. That's probably where she is."

"They don't open today," I said. I turned to Jasper, who shook his head at me.

"No answer," he said.

"Okay, um, Jasper, Emmett, come with me. We'll take my car," I said, rushing to grab their coats. "Bella, Edward, make sure your phones are on. Call us if you hear anything, okay?"

They nodded, and Bella turned off the TV. Her face was paler than usual. Edward took out his phone, made sure it was on loud, then put it on the coffee table. Jasper put on his coat. Emmett grabbed my keys and walked out the door, ignoring his jacket. I knew there was no use trying to get him to put it on.

I never minded the stairs in our apartment building. Sure, I would've rather taken an elevator up seven floors, but I got a kick out of the exercise. That day, I wanted to beat them down. No speed was fast enough to get to the bottom, especially not in my shoes. I should've changed, but there was no time.

We piled into my car, and Emmett revved up the engine. His face was set in stone. I'd never seen Emmett scared, not once. Not when we were kids, and certainly not in recent years. In that instant, he looked terrified.

We drove toward the grocery store. My heart fell as I saw it in the distance with its lights off. If the store was closed, where was Rose?

Suddenly, in the street to my left, I saw a dark coat and a mass of blonde hair. My heart flew back into place.

"There she is!" I cried. "She's fine, there she is!"

But as Emmett slowed down, I saw that it wasn't her. It was an anonymous woman, rushing home for Thanksgiving. It wasn't Rose. Emmett sped up the car.

"Wait, stop!" I said as another figure on the sidewalk caught my attention. "Stop the car!"

The car came to an abrupt stop. I rolled down my window.

"Royce!" I called out. "Royce!"

I hadn't seen much of Royce King since we moved to New York. He lived in a building not far from us, but he never seemed to be around. I passed him on my way to the store sometimes, but that was it. I wasn't even sure he'd come in contact with Bella or Rose more than once.

"Alice?" he asked, approaching the car. "Is that you?"

"Yeah, it's me," I said.

He stuck his head into the car and smiled. For a jerk, he had a really nice smile. I usually wanted to punch it hard enough to make his teeth fall out, but I was desperate.

"Hey Jasper," he said. "Emmett." Neither of them said anything back.

"Yeah, listen, um, have you seen Rose?" I asked. "She left the apartment to pick up some last minute groceries four hours ago, and we haven't heard from her since."

He shook his head. "Nope, haven't seen her. I'm sure she's fine. Rosalie's a big girl."

"Yeah, okay," I said. No amount of 'she's fine' could calm me down. "Thanks, anyway, Royce. Happy Thanksgiving."

"And to you." He tipped his hat and grinned in a way that made me uneasy. "Alice, let me know if you find her. Okay?"

"Um, sure," I said, trying not to look him in the eye. "Bye, Royce." I rolled up my window. Emmett kept driving.

"I really don't like that guy," Jasper said.

"Tell me about it," I groaned.

We drove around for at least half an hour, examining every nearby street and alley. I was about to call Bella to see if she'd heard anything when Emmett made a sharp right turn that nearly smashed my head against the window. He opened the door of the car without parking it, jumped over the hood, and disappeared behind a dumpster.

"What the - " I started, opening my own door.

And then I saw Rose's blonde hair peaking out from behind the dumpster, laying in the snow.

My door hit against the brick wall, but I couldn't have cared less. I ran for the dumpster, Jasper just behind me.

Emmett had Rose in his lap, his arms holding her body close to his chest. The snow next to them was red with blood. The side of Rose's face I could see was dirty. Her coat was haphazardly thrown on. I saw her favorite dress, the one she'd been wearing, hanging out of the dumpster. One of her shoes was still on her feet. The other sat a few feet away, the heel broken off. Her lip bled. She was shivering, and paler than I'd ever seen her.

"I'll drive," I said. I crouched down next to Rose. Her eyes very slowly found my face. "You're gonna be okay, Rosie. Okay? Okay, we're going to a hospital. Emmett, sit in the back with her. You'll be fine, Rose." I stroked her hair with my shaking hand and kissed her forehead. I think she tried to smile.

My knees buckled under me as we hurried back to the car. Tears flooded from my eyes. Jasper grabbed my shoulder. He looked like he hadn't slept in days.

"I'll drive," he said. I could only manage a nod. He wiped a tear from my cheek and got into the driver's seat. I curled into the passenger's seat.

Emmett's voice was barely audible from the backseat. "Rose, honey, you're going to be just fine." He was crying. He sobbed between his words. "Nothing bad is going to happen anymore. You're safe. I love you. You're safe."

My trembling fingers struggled to find Bella's number in my phone. When I finally managed to call her, she answered on the first ring.

"Hello?" She sounded like she'd been crying.

"We're taking Rose to the hospital," I said, trying to put a stopper in my tears. "Meet us there."

"What happened?" she asked, a sob shaking her words.

"I - we don't know. Meet us there." I ended the call. Jasper looked at me from the corner of his eye. He took one hand off the wheel, placed it in mine, and squeezed. I tried to squeeze back.

"Rose, baby, you're fine," Emmett was saying. "You're fine, you're gonna be just fine. God, baby, I love you. You're going to be fine, you'll see. You'll be fine. Rose…" His voice collapsed into sobs. I tried to stop listening.

I'd never been more terrified in my life.


	23. Chapter 23

I wasn't sure how long we'd been in the waiting room.

My nose burned with the smell of the hospital. The medicine, the sickness. The stench was too much for me. I couldn't remember ever being so bothered by a hospital. Then again, I'd never been in one for any more than a checkup, a vaccine. Never for something like this.

We hadn't been allowed to go in with Rose. Emmett fought. He almost got himself kicked out, cursing and threatening the doctors. Jasper held him back. They sat on either side of me, both as pale as the white walls behind them. I hadn't seen myself since we arrived. I hadn't even moved. I probably looked just as bad, maybe worse. My makeup wasn't waterproof.

Bella and Edward sat across from us. Bella was still. Her chest hardly rose or fell with her breathing. Edward had been on the phone since he arrived, talking to Carlisle and Esme, my mom, Rose's parents. Jasper had tried to talk to his mother, but had given the phone back to Edward after a few moments.

"She's screaming," he said, his voice shaking. "I - I can't."

His head fell into my lap and he cried. I stroked his hair as his sobs shook his body. I ignored the stares from other people in the waiting room - some sympathetic, some annoyed. I bit back my tears. My tongue brushed my lip and I tasted blood. I kept biting. Someone had to be strong. I only wished it hadn't had to be me.

Every time the double doors that lead to the hospital rooms opened, Emmett would stand. The nurse or doctor who exited the doors would shake their head and continue on their way. Every doctor who failed to bring news about Rose frustrated him. He grew steadily more desperate as the hours went on. I glanced at him only once in all those hours, and regretted it immediately. He'd aged so much in just that night. The happy, light-hearted Emmett who I'd seen carrying groceries that morning was gone. His eyes looked darker. His lips seemed as though they'd be unable to ever form a smile again. He looked nothing like the Emmett from my childhood. I wondered what Rose would look like the next time I saw her. A lump formed in my throat that I couldn't swallow.

The clock across the room read midnight. The window directly under it showed mostly darkness, the only light being from the streetlamps reflected off the ghostly white snow. The lack of cars made me forget we were in the city. Everyone was home, celebrating the holiday with their families, patting their turkey-filled stomachs and sipping champagne as they sent their children off to sleep.

I'd give anything to go back. I'd give anything to insist Rose took my car, or at least walked with her. There was nothing I wouldn't do to be able to turn that clock back and stop her from going out that door.

Jasper was still trembling in my lap. Emmett stood as the doors opened once more. A nurse with red hair shook her head at him.

"God DAMN IT," Emmett yelled, his fist colliding with the wall. "GOD DAMN IT ALL."

"Em," Bella said, lightly touching her arm with her fingertips. Only then, with her face tilted up into the light, did I notice the tears that stained her cheeks. "Stop. You're disturbing everyone. The other people in here are worried about someone, too."

Emmett flinched away from her hand like he'd been burned and slid back into his seat. His head fell into his hands. The next time the double doors opened, he didn't stand.

It was a waiting game. Several nurses came to ask us on occasions if we needed something - food, water, a bathroom. All for no cost to us, of course. Edward politely declined them on our behalf each time. I tried to at least smile politely, but the corners of my mouth wouldn't turn up. I managed a grimace.

It was nearly two in the morning when the doctor who walked through the double doors didn't shake his head at us. I shook Jasper, who had fallen asleep in my lap, awake and patted Emmett on the shoulder. He lifted his head out of his hands. His eyes were red. I caught Bella and Edward's attention.

"I have to go," Edward said into the phone. "The doctor is coming… yes, I'll call back with any news. Bye."

The five of us stood up. The doctor looked tired, and very stern. It worried me. I searched for Jasper's hand and squeezed when I found it. He stroked my thumb.

"She's conscious," he said without introducing himself. His nametag read Dr. Clearwater. "But I can only let family in the room for now."

"We're family," I said, without thinking. I often forgot that Rose wasn't really my sister, or even my cousin. How could I ever consider her only a friend? I couldn't, of course.

The doctor raised an eyebrow at me. "All of you?" he asked suspiciously.

"We grew up together," Bella said pleadingly. "Please. We have to see her."

"And you will, in due time," he said. "For now, only family. Hospital regulations. Does she have any family here? Parents, a husband?"

"I'm her boyfriend," Emmett said. His fists clenched and unclenched at his side.

The doctor took off his glasses. "Family only."

"I'm her brother," Jasper said. He pulled his ID out of his pocket and held it up to Dr. Clearwater's face for inspection. "May I please see my sister?"

Jasper's voice was broken, like he had to strain every word through bloodied vocal cords. I'd never seen his face so drained. He looked as though he hadn't slept in days.

"Follow me," Dr. Clearwater said to Jasper. He turned toward the doors, but Jasper turned to face us.

"You'll all see her soon," he said. "You heard him. I'll find out whatever I can. Emmett." He let go of my hand and put one hand on either of Emmett's shoulders. "She's okay. They would've told us if she wasn't."

Emmett nodded. I'd never seen him show any affection toward someone who wasn't Rose, but he hugged Jasper without any hesitation.

"Tell her I love her," I heard him whisper.

"I will." Jasper tried to smile as Emmett stepped back. It didn't work.

He took one of my hands in both of his and kissed it.

"I'll be back," he said. He followed the doctor through the double doors and was gone before I could blink.

For the rest of us, it was back to playing the waiting game.

Emmett didn't sit down. He couldn't after that. He paced at times, stood at others. Bella sat curled up into Edward, his head resting on hers. Bella was the first to fall asleep. Edward, though he tried not to, followed soon after. I sat alone across from them.

"I'm going to go get food," I said as a spur of the moment decision. I was tired of staring at the same wall, the same double doors. "Does anyone want anything?"

Bella and Edward stirred. Emmett stopped pacing, but he didn't say anything.

"Anything," Bella said. "I'm not picky." Edward nodded in agreement.

"Okay, I'll be back."

I walked toward the front desk to ask where I could find the cafeteria. The nurse smiled at me.

"Take the corridor to your left, then the first right," she said before I could ask. "You can't miss it."

"Thanks," I said. I suddenly noticed how cold it was. I looked back at Bella. She was shivering. Edward took off his jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders.

"Um, do you know where I could get a couple of blankets?" I asked the nurse.

"I'll find some for you and your friends," she said. "A couple of pillows, too, if you'd like."

I wanted to cry. "Thank you so much," I said.

"It's no trouble," she said. "Really. I know how hard it is. I've seen dozens of people come in here just like your friend, seen how their families and friends react. Rape is an ugly thing."

Rape? Who said anything about rape? I nodded, trying to be polite, but I ended up gagging. I keeled over, landed on my knees, and vomited.

"Oh, goodness!" the nurse at the desk exclaimed. I burst into tears.

"I'm - sorry," I said between sobs. I reached up onto the counter for a tissue and tried to clean up my mess. I tried not to look over at Bella, Edward, and Emmett. I hoped they hadn't noticed. "I'll - clean. I'll clean - it - up."

"No, no, sweetie, it's okay," the nurse said, coming around the desk with a mop. "It's fine, really. Do you want to lay down somewhere? We can get you a room if you feel sick."

"No, I'm okay," I lied. I wiped my face and found a huge streak of black on my hand. I never wanted to wear makeup again.

"I'm - I'm sorry," I said again. I stood up and ran into the corridor. I pushed open the first bathroom door I saw and saw a urinal directly across from me. I would have backed out, but my body thought otherwise. I vomited again, missing the sink by a couple of inches. I stumbled into a stall, locked the door, and kneeled by the toilet, preparing myself for another wave. All I got were dry heaves. I hadn't eaten in hours. I had nothing left to throw up.

_Rape is an ugly thing, _she'd said. I started sobbing again. Rape? Rose? Who could ever - who would even - how could anyone…?

"Alice?"

I heard Bella's soft voice drifting in from the door. I pulled myself up from the floor.

"Alice?" she said again. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I said, stepping out of the stall. "I'm… yeah."

I leaned against the sink, my mouth aiming for the sink. I felt like I was going to be sick again. I wanted to be prepared. My eyes deliberately ignored the mirror in front of me.

"Are you okay?" Bella asked, unsatisfied with my previous answer.

I collapsed onto her. She managed to catch me, and she stroked my hair as I soaked through her shirt with my tears.

"Shh, shh," she crooned. "Everything's going to be okay. Rose is fine. She'll be just fine."

My sobs grew louder with each of her words. Fine? God, how could she be fine after this? She _would_ be fine, of course, she was Rose. Rose was always so strong, so… together. But… rape? I pushed Bella away from me and threw up into the sink. She held my small amount of hair out of my face and rubbed my back.

My tears mixed with my vomit and I couldn't avoid the mirror anymore. Behind me, Bella was crying. Her cheeks were red, but so unlike the Bella Blush I'd giggled at since we were kids. Her hair was up, and her bangs stuck to her forehead. My eyes flashed to my own face. My face was stained black with eyeliner and mascara, my face was red, and my eyes were puffy. All of my curls had curled out of my hair, which hung limply around my cheeks. My clothes were stained with dirty snow and - I gulped - Rose's blood. It wasn't much, but it was enough to make me sick again.

"Do you want water, Alice?" Bella asked when I finished. "Should I get a doctor? You might be coming down with something… This can't be okay."

"No, no, I'm fine," I said. My voice was cracking and my lips were dry, but I didn't want water. I was sure anything I ingested would just come right back up.

I leaned over the sink in silence for a while, Bella rubbing my back the whole time. She didn't ask anything. She didn't have to. We were twins. She knew me better than anyone, and she knew I'd talk when I was ready.

"I know what happened to Rose," I croaked after what seemed like an eternity. "The nurse told me… she didn't know we had no idea."

"Really?" Bella said, leaning in so that her face was right next to mine. "What… what happened?" She wasn't sure she wanted to know. I could hear it in her voice. I started crying again.

"Bells…" My voice trailed off. Could I even get it out? "She - Rose was - she was raped, Bells. Raped." The last word was a sob. Bella's choked gasp rang in my ear, and suddenly we were hugging, sobbing into each other's shoulders.

"Who - could - do - that - to - Rose?" she asked.

I couldn't answer her. No one could. It made no sense. Rose was beautiful, of course. Everyone knew that. But that didn't merit… nothing made her deserve… nothing made _anyone_ deserve that. There was no 'she shouldn't have been out by herself' or 'she shouldn't have made herself look so attractive' about it. It was so brutally unfair. Rose had done nothing wrong. It was someone else's fault, someone who I wanted dead. Whoever it was, I wanted to strangle them. I wanted to hold their neck in my tiny hands and somehow squeeze the life out of them.

Of all the inexplicable things in the world, this had to be at the top of the list. How could anyone do that to Rose?


End file.
